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Clips from American Dad! - Spring Break-up (S03E03)

"Oh, come on! You used to think that was funny!"
American Dad!
"You need to get some new material."
American Dad!
"Okay. Your dinners are in the fridge."
American Dad!
"Francine, you're not looking at my fingers."
American Dad!
"Did he do something? Say you'll buy her jewelry. He'll buy you jewelry!"
American Dad!
"The place off the freeway is nice."
American Dad!
"Francine hates you. You should kill yourself in the motel off the freeway."
American Dad!
"Why would I want to get rid of you? I love you! Let's have sex!"
American Dad!
"Inside are wristbands- red for cabanas, blue for the beer line."
American Dad!
"I'm Scotch Bingeington, the true king of spring break!"
American Dad!
"Yup. I put up a Web site, cold-called some schools."
American Dad!
"- I'm wasted! - I'm so drunk."
American Dad!
"- Oh, yeah! I'm gonna hit that. - I'm gonna tear that up!"
American Dad!
"Five tears will have you on your ass."
American Dad!
"- Roger, there's no way you're having spring break here! - Mmm!"
American Dad!
"Little hot dog with your-"
American Dad!
"No. I mean- I mean, I am funny, but I work for the C.I.A."
American Dad!
"Oh, my God! Tracy!"
American Dad!
"- He works for the C.I. A! - Whatever."
American Dad!
"Uh-"
American Dad!
"- I'm Jessica. - I'm Stan."
American Dad!
"So then I fed this Colombian warlord his own tongue..."
American Dad!
"Yeah. Had it in my storage space from when I lived in Phoenix."
American Dad!
"Well, I lived in Mesa. But when you say Mesa, people don't know what Mesa is."
American Dad!
"than having a broadcast journalist in the family."
American Dad!
"You're interesting, you're funny, and you're pretty."
American Dad!
"You're awesome."
American Dad!
"Hey, I just called to remind you tomorrow's trash day..."
American Dad!
"You so chatty! Hang up phone! Daddy need to be farted."
American Dad!
"You know, I-I don't know what I was thinking."
American Dad!
"I'm pretending you're a whale, and I'm a parasitic fish who's gonna eat all your algae!"
American Dad!
"We're finally gonna get boob!"
American Dad!
"You're gonna get a lot more than that!"
American Dad!
"Carm, you made it!"
American Dad!
"Welcome, MTV below-the-line workers."
American Dad!
"- Come on. Let's do this. - Unhand me, inebriated temptress!"
American Dad!
"Oh, you're getting wet!"
American Dad!
"Splash buddies, looks like. You were splashing her for so long."
American Dad!
"Yeah. Scotch was really blowing it up."
American Dad!
"# Uh, what you Uh, what you want #"
American Dad!
"# Spread your love and fly You and me for life #"
American Dad!
"You got a real pretty face."
American Dad!
"Pretty, like a stripper's face."
American Dad!
"Francine! Oh, it's spring break! It's great!"
American Dad!
"Nice to meet you!"
American Dad!
"Jess, we got to go."
American Dad!
"Oh, I'm gonna miss you so much!"
American Dad!
"We'll be spring break buddies forever. Bye, Stan."
American Dad!
"Stan, what the hell?"
American Dad!
"- You're being ridiculous! - Well, Jessica doesn't think so."
American Dad!
"Jessica says I'm funny and important and pretty!"
American Dad!
"Spring break never has to be over."
American Dad!
"After spending a week with her, I remember what it's like to be with someone who appreciates me!"
American Dad!
"Phew! Do not go on the beach volleyball court."
American Dad!
"Are you one of her father's war buddies?"
American Dad!
"I'm willing to have sex with you..."
American Dad!
"Nowadays you can't be too safe..."
American Dad!
"just because I didn't laugh at his stupid coffee joke he's told a thousand times!"
American Dad!
"And it never funny. Not once."
American Dad!
"But that was only for, like, two days."
American Dad!
"# I just want to fly #"
American Dad!
"- I came to be with you. Hi, Tracy! - Eww!"
American Dad!
"Stan! Are you crazy?"
American Dad!
"Are you trying to tell me this wasn't real?"
American Dad!
"Just- leave me alone. Go home."
American Dad!
"My doctor faxed it over. Some of the pages are faint. You're low on toner."
American Dad!
"Sorry, Carmen. I can't."
American Dad!
"Francine? Wh-What are you doing here?"
American Dad!
"I came to find you."
American Dad!
"Oh, Francine. I'm so embarrassed about how I acted!"
American Dad!
"No. This is my fault too."
American Dad!
"I want to be the one to make you feel that way... always."
American Dad!
"Hey, have a little coffee with your sugar."
American Dad!
"Mmm."
American Dad!
"I threw a good spring break, maybe even a great spring break..."
American Dad!
"but not the best spring break ever."
American Dad!
"They're all real, baby, so come and get it!"
American Dad!
"Oh, my God! She's dead! Carmen is dead!"
American Dad!
"# Good morning, U.S.A. #"
American Dad!
"#The sun in the sky has a smile on his face #"
American Dad!
"#And he's shining a salute to the American race #"
American Dad!
"#Good morning, U.S.A. ##"
American Dad!
"Yes, honey. The first thousand times you said it."
American Dad!
"Maybe you need to forget my old material!"
American Dad!
"Mostly I'll be pressing down on his abdomen to release gas, or " fart him. ""
American Dad!
"I wish I could go with you, Francine, but I have to work."
American Dad!
"You know, got to protect the country."
American Dad!
"Please. I've been to your work."
American Dad!
"You bowl oranges at plastic cups and google people you went to high school with."
American Dad!
"That's how I found out that Rebecca Green is a real estate agent in Chimdale!"
American Dad!
"And we're finally gonna lose..."
American Dad!
"our fear of college-level number theory!"
American Dad!
"Man, your suitcase is heavy!"
American Dad!
"Is what someone less buff than myself would say."
American Dad!
"Aah! Oh! My foot! You ran over my foot!"
American Dad!
"Nothing? You used to love the crushed-foot bit."
American Dad!
"- Do you think I'm pretty? - Stan, I'm late."
American Dad!
"Why aren't you taking Stan?"
American Dad!
"Jewelry! What, are you crazy? On your salary?"
American Dad!
"I'm not going with her, Roger. Not that she really cares."
American Dad!
"I guess after 20 years of marriage, Francine is bored with me."
American Dad!
"- Are you trying to get rid of me? - That's ridiculous!"
American Dad!
"Go wait for me in the motel off the freeway. Oh, too late. Here we go."
American Dad!
"Welcome, Rutgers, to Spring Break '08!"
American Dad!
"Yeah!"
American Dad!
"Roger, what the hell is going on?"
American Dad!
"Last year I was watching MTV's Spring Break with Carmen Selectra."
American Dad!
"She was at a house in Cabo talking to this total idiot."
American Dad!
""King of spring break, '"they called him."
American Dad!
""Wildest spring break ever, '"they said."
American Dad!
"That spring break sucks! I could throw a better spring break than that loser! '""
American Dad!
"My scepter shoots Chivas!"
American Dad!
"And this end dispenses Ludens cough drops. I'm fighting something."
American Dad!
"You're having spring break in my house?"
American Dad!
"Rutgers is here. A bus from Georgetown is coming."
American Dad!
"Central Virginia State. Yes, it's a real school."
American Dad!
"You've read about them. Their mascot allegedly raped that stripper."
American Dad!
"Remember? He stayed in his costume the whole time, never took his head off?"
American Dad!
"Get to know me, Stan. I'm amazing."
American Dad!
"I'm gonna kill her with a bottle!"
American Dad!
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