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Clips from Schitt's Creek - Turkey Shoot (S01E01)

"Um, Twy..."
Schitt's Creek
"What is in the "meadow harvest" smoothie?"
Schitt's Creek
"Ah, you know, it changes every day. Just depends on my mood."
Schitt's Creek
"But it's all organic, earthy ingredients."
Schitt's Creek
"Okay, so it's like fruity or..."
Schitt's Creek
"Yes, it is. Yup. At times."
Schitt's Creek
"Okay! Well, today, is it more fruity or more vegetably..."
Schitt's Creek
"You know, I don't know."
Schitt's Creek
"So "meadow harvest" doesn't refer to anything in particular."
Schitt's Creek
"No, meadow harvest is exactly how it sounds."
Schitt's Creek
"It just changes every day."
Schitt's Creek
"Okay. All right."
Schitt's Creek
"Well, I'll just, um, do that then, the meadow harvest thing."
Schitt's Creek
"- Great. - Thank you."
Schitt's Creek
"Hi."
Schitt's Creek
"Hi."
Schitt's Creek
"Um, I just feel like I have to warn you,"
Schitt's Creek
"Excuse me?"
Schitt's Creek
"She's a sweet girl but her smoothies are deadly."
Schitt's Creek
"Um, I usually prescribe them to my patients"
Schitt's Creek
"That's a lot of information."
Schitt's Creek
"I'm kidding."
Schitt's Creek
"I'm actually not. I've absolutely done that with her smoothies."
Schitt's Creek
"So are you a doctor or..."
Schitt's Creek
"I'm a veterinarian."
Schitt's Creek
"Ted."
Schitt's Creek
"Um, Alexis."
Schitt's Creek
"I know. Without sounding too forward,"
Schitt's Creek
"I've seen you around..."
Schitt's Creek
"And, uh, you know, I have to say,"
Schitt's Creek
"What? No."
Schitt's Creek
"I'm sure there's, like, another girl somewhere."
Schitt's Creek
"Yeah. Well, that's really nice of you to say."
Schitt's Creek
"I would love to take you out to dinner sometime."
Schitt's Creek
"- Uh... - I feel good about this one."
Schitt's Creek
"Yeah, it's a little less fruity but a little more something."
Schitt's Creek
"Mmm."
Schitt's Creek
"Mmm."
Schitt's Creek
"So, about the bug thing."
Schitt's Creek
"No explanation necessary. You've got a thing about bugs."
Schitt's Creek
"No, I don't have a thing about bugs."
Schitt's Creek
"It was one bug, and that bug was milky."
Schitt's Creek
"So, you're a man at one with nature."
Schitt's Creek
"Yeah. I could not be more at one with nature."
Schitt's Creek
"I do Coachella every year, so..."
Schitt's Creek
"Oh! So you'd be into coming with me"
Schitt's Creek
"on the annual turkey shoot then?"
Schitt's Creek
"That's something that should excite you."
Schitt's Creek
"What?"
Schitt's Creek
"The turkey shoot?"
Schitt's Creek
"- Mmm. - Roland's annual thing. We go out and we hunt turkeys."
Schitt's Creek
"Been doing it every year since I was"
Schitt's Creek
"far too young to be holding a gun."
Schitt's Creek
"Yeah. Yes."
Schitt's Creek
"Yeah. Let's do that."
Schitt's Creek
"I was joking."
Schitt's Creek
"I have a strong feeling that would not be your thing."
Schitt's Creek
"And what do think my thing is exactly?"
Schitt's Creek
"High thread count sheets? Colognes that smell like fireplace..."
Schitt's Creek
"Okay. Well, it might surprise you to know"
Schitt's Creek
"that I have more than one thing,"
Schitt's Creek
"so I will happily go with you on the hunt."
Schitt's Creek
"Nothing would make me more excited than to..."
Schitt's Creek
"Go hunting for..."
Schitt's Creek
"- Turkeys. - Turkeys with you, so..."
Schitt's Creek
"Is this a tweed or a camo situation?"
Schitt's Creek
"Okay, did anyone actually see this pillow come out of this container?"
Schitt's Creek
"Seriously? Go to hell!"
Schitt's Creek
"You're a fool!"
Schitt's Creek
"Okay, Moira, why are we doing this?"
Schitt's Creek
"Why don't we wait for the girl to come in and help us make the bed?"
Schitt's Creek
"No. Bastard."
Schitt's Creek
"- Bastard! - Jocelyn."
Schitt's Creek
"- Johnny. - Hi."
Schitt's Creek
"Good, you're here, Moira."
Schitt's Creek
"I was just booking myself an appointment with Janine at the salon,"
Schitt's Creek
"and I said to myself, "Wow!"
Schitt's Creek
""Moira really looks like she needs a pick-me-up,""
Schitt's Creek
"so I booked you a mani too!"
Schitt's Creek
"Little girls spa day on me."
Schitt's Creek
"May I see a spa treatment menu?"
Schitt's Creek
"Oh, well, it's just a salon, so they don't really do all that kind of stuff."
Schitt's Creek
"But she does give a mean scalp massage."
Schitt's Creek
"Really mean?"
Schitt's Creek
"If you requested that, I guess, yeah."
Schitt's Creek
"Please, please do this, for me."
Schitt's Creek
"Let me rephrase that."
Schitt's Creek
"- Yay! - Oh, yes."
Schitt's Creek
"So, what're you doing tonight?"
Schitt's Creek
"Making chili. Might do some laundry."
Schitt's Creek
"Um. What're you doing tonight?"
Schitt's Creek
"Ted's taking me out."
Schitt's Creek
"Ted?"
Schitt's Creek
"I don't know his last name. The, uh... The, um, doctor."
Schitt's Creek
"The vet?"
Schitt's Creek
"Yeah, the doctor."
Schitt's Creek
"Yeah, we went to high school together."
Schitt's Creek
"Do you?"
Schitt's Creek
"I think he has everything you're looking for in a husband."
Schitt's Creek
"A husband?"
Schitt's Creek
"What am I looking for in a husband?"
Schitt's Creek
"Money."
Schitt's Creek
"Hmm."
Schitt's Creek
"So Ted's taking me to Antonio's."
Schitt's Creek
"What's Antonio's?"
Schitt's Creek
"It's this little buffet restaurant in Elmdale."
Schitt's Creek
"But he said that we could order off the menu."
Schitt's Creek
"Are you sure you wanna be traveling so far out of town"
Schitt's Creek
"with a person you just met?"
Schitt's Creek
"I went on a blind date to Bali with Leo,"
Schitt's Creek
"So who is this person?"
Schitt's Creek
"Mmm. He's cute."
Schitt's Creek
"And?"
Schitt's Creek
"And..."
Schitt's Creek
"He doesn't have a trust fund,"
Schitt's Creek
"so that's, like, a refreshing change of pace for me."
Schitt's Creek
"Speaking of people without trust funds,"
Schitt's Creek
"what about that beardy thing that you spend time with?"
Schitt's Creek
"- What, Mutt? - Yeah."
Schitt's Creek
"No. Eww. It's not a thing."
Schitt's Creek
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