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Clips from Please Like Me - Spanish Eggs (S01E01)

"- It's in. - Ah, good."
Please Like Me
"- We'll have a singalong. - Yes!"
Please Like Me
"♪ It's time to begin, let's count it in ♪"
Please Like Me
"♪ 5, 6, 7, 8 ♪"
Please Like Me
"♪ My bootscootin' baby is... ♪"
Please Like Me
"- Rose, join in! - No, I don't want to."
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"♪ My dance floor date... ♪"
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"- What's happening? - It's a thing we do. Just go with it."
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"No."
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"Ah, Peg, I don't think you can stop here."
Please Like Me
"Oh, ok, fine."
Please Like Me
"♪ My bootscootin' baby is drivin' me crazy ♪"
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"♪ My rodeo Romeo ♪"
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"♪ Wanna make you mine, better get in line ♪"
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"♪ 5, 6, 7, 8 ♪"
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"♪ Foot kickin', finger clickin' ♪"
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"♪ Leather slappin', hand clappin' ♪"
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"♪ Hip bumpin', music thumpin' ♪"
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"♪ Big grinnin', body spinnin' ♪"
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"♪ Rompin', stompin', slidin', glidin' ♪"
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"♪ Pumpin', jumpin', here we go! ♪"
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"- Alan. - Hello, Rose."
Please Like Me
"Thank you so much for coming to help out today."
Please Like Me
"I really appreciate it. It's very generous of you."
Please Like Me
"Shall we get started?"
Please Like Me
"Open for inspection!"
Please Like Me
"Right."
Please Like Me
"- Right. - So, where do we start, then?"
Please Like Me
"Should I vacuum?"
Please Like Me
"Jesus, when's the last time you vacuumed?"
Please Like Me
"I'm depressed. I don't vacuum."
Please Like Me
"We're in the same family. We all have the same habits."
Please Like Me
"No, please. You really don't need to vacuum."
Please Like Me
"And you won't have time if you're gonna make the game."
Please Like Me
"What game?"
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"Rose, it was meant to be a surprise."
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"He really doesn't like surprises, Geoffrey."
Please Like Me
"- What game? - Collingwood v St Kilda. Members Stand."
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"Oh, no, not AFL. I don't like it. You know I don't."
Please Like Me
"What about Claire's '70s-themed dinner party?"
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"- I'm really excited about that... - We will be there on time, Josh."
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"Can't you just take someone else? I'll ruin the fun for you."
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"- Can't you just find a real boy? - Or you can stay here and help us."
Please Like Me
"My advice is take the football."
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"Alan! Alan, can you come here, please?"
Please Like Me
"Now, I think this would look much better in the backyard."
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"Ah, Rose, there's no way. There's just no way."
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"I really need this done. I don't have anybody here to help me do it."
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"- Rose, it's not possible. - Ok, fine. Forget it, then."
Please Like Me
"Let's just go down to the corner store for some chocolate milk, shall we?"
Please Like Me
"Oh, Rose, I don't think we've got time to go down to the..."
Please Like Me
"Uh, what are you doing? We don't have time for milk."
Please Like Me
"- I just want some delicious milk. - What are you doing?"
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"I know about her, ok? I know."
Please Like Me
"I know she's waiting down at the corner store. Josh said."
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"Why the fuck does that matter? He told me because it came up."
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"Ok, yes, yes, you're right."
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"Anyway, I've decided I'm not angry about it."
Please Like Me
"I've moved on anyway. I'm happy for you."
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"Hey, Ma. Me and Geoffrey are going out to the football, alright?"
Please Like Me
"Bye."
Please Like Me
"Alright, Alan. Now, I am going into the kitchen to do some tidying up."
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"I'm going to leave you with this tree."
Please Like Me
"Rose..."
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"So... what's she like, then?"
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"- Who? - Mee."
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"Mae."
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"Yeah, just tell me about her. I want us to be friends."
Please Like Me
"Then I can tell you about Rod."
Please Like Me
"- That's good. - Yeah, so where did you meet her?"
Please Like Me
"On a plane."
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"- Yeah. - She mustn't have very good eyesight."
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"They don't all have bad eyesight, Rose."
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"What? Oh, Alan, no, not because she's Asian!"
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"Oh, no, I was making a joke about you, about how you look."
Please Like Me
"I was joking about how she came all the way out here for you"
Please Like Me
"and you look like, ugh, that."
Please Like Me
"Right. That's very funny."
Please Like Me
"So tell me about Rod."
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"Oh, well, he's horrible to talk to but he's incredible in bed. Best I've ever had."
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"Go, go, go!"
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"Oh, that's useless!"
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"Geoffrey, I can't find the fifth one."
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"The ball!"
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"Oh, really? What's it like?"
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"Tom, I'm so fucking bored."
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"Geoffrey keeps yelling things that I can't understand."
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"How did he talk you into this?"
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"I'm making compromises, ok? Apparently it's good to compromise."
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"You never compromise."
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"Yeah, I know, because then I end up in situations like this."
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"Oh, why did I get back with him? I'm just such a big dope."
Please Like Me
"Uh, 'cause he's pretty, and you were rejected and alone?"
Please Like Me
"- How's your baby? - We're at the doctor now."
Please Like Me
"Oh, are you..."
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"- Are you getting it done? - Done?"
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"Like you're getting it all, you know..."
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"No. We're not getting it..."
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"we're not getting an abortion."
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"I want to keep it."
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"I've been thinking, and I think one of my favourite things about Geoffrey"
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"is that he doesn't have a uterus, you know,"
Please Like Me
"'cause it means that we could never get ourselves into this situation."
Please Like Me
"I think it's good for the world there's no risk you could get someone pregnant."
Please Like Me
"Yeah."
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"Are you a little bit surprised that your sperm actually works?"
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"Pick up the ball, you idiot. Get on him. On him!"
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"Geoffrey, I've decided I want to get involved. I'm ready."
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"- Ok, ok. You see this bloke? - Yes."
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"Centre half-forward, right?"
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"- His main role is to move the ball... - toward the bloody goal!"
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"Don't drop it!"
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"You sound angry. Is he bad? Is he a bad one?"
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"- No, he was best and fairest last year. - He's the best one?"
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"So I can just yell whatever I like at these people"
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"even though they're doing way more than I ever could?"
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"He's not doing anything today."
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"What are you gonna do when you get too old to do this?"
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"The life of a sportsman is short, and you never got a real education!"
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"Pick up the ball, you idiot!"
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