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Clips from Shameless - Pilot (S01E01)

"Kev and Veronica, fantastic neighbors."
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"FIONA: Seven fifteen, monkeys. Come on."
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"Electric."
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"LIP: Deb, that's getting really good. FIONA: Who's got the phone?"
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"I'm working after school."
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"Here you go."
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"...and she's crying because she lost one ear and she can't find it."
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"No, more like a plan."
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"...un|ess acted upon by an external force."
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"Yeah, this isn't charity. I get paid for tutoring."
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"-Where's his stamp? -Can you believe this joker’?"
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"-Fine. You're all barred. -For what?"
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"-Drugs. -What?"
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"He probably let him get away, he knows him."
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"I mean, I thought we tell each other everything."
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"...but I was offered a place in the nursing school."
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"Fine, but it never happened."
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"Yo, Veronica. You got my keys?"
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"...you'd think the man would have manslaughter down by now."
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"No more fuck-ups like leaving his dad breathing."
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"-What, that's his? -Yeah. Well, company car."
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"...within a year, he owned it. Made his first billion by 20."
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"-I'm not a dumb prick. -Kevin, ljust met the guy an hour ago."
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"You sure didn't mind watching him take his shirt off now, did you?"
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""Not bad.""
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"Slower. Slower."
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"Shit."
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"ls Fiona in?"
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"Ahem."
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"You think little guys can't be fucking faulting you»-"
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"Who the hell is that?"
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"He smoked his lunch again. He won't even know."
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"-What's with the crowd? -Layoff at the Chrysler plant."
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"[PATRONS CHEERING]"
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"Fuck, no."
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"Come on. You can get laid anywhere."
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"[DRYER RA'I'|'L|NG]"
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"-...where they can breathe? -Sure."
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"You kids want some homemade lime chicken chimichangas?"
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"EDDIE: All right. I'm off to work."
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"SHEILA: Guess what I made for your lunch."
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"-My bedroom, top of the TV. -Yeah?"
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"Pack of smokes and the lighter. Okay."
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"Reap what? What are you reaping now?"
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"Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. Whatever it is, I'll try. I'll really try."
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"-Pork rinds? -No."
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"Get yourself to that mosque so your dad stops blaming me..."
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"She's your mother, get her to take her Thorazine."
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"No worries."
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"He ain't seen nothing yet."
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"If all you want is to be needed, then congratulations."
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"Thanks for all your hard work.""
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""He's overly generous and that bugs me.""
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"STEVE [OVER PHONE]: I don't buy and sell cars."
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"[ENGINE REVS]"
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"Seems nice."
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"KASH: All right, you stack the butter. I'll do the snacks."
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"Stuff he's never heard of, stuff he might like..."
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"It makes you wrong, you fucking smart asshole."
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"It's not a case of whether or not I agree, it's a fact. If I were a single parent--"
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"...I am slammed in the ribs by a headless flying chicken."
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"-...God rest her soul. -Dad, stop it."
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"-Continuity. -Continuity."
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"-You got any idea what time it is? -Sorry, it's Frank. He's--"
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"KEVIN: Frank, what did I tell you? -Here we go. Neighbors of Satan."
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"Your dad made me follow you up."
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"One."
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"-Yeah? Who? -I'm not telling you, all right?"
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"What? What?"
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"You're not-- You forgot to take the trash out."
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"...knows the most important thing in this life:"
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"Like a hobby?"
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"She won't ever get enough Once she gets a little touch"
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"Hey, talk out of your ass with that much conviction..."
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"-You okay, Lip? -Please, don't touch it."
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"Don't try blaming me for this."
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""Because I'm not used to getting spoiled.""
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"-It was a kid at school. -Yeah?"
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"But seriously, like...."
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"[LAUGHS]"
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"Boy's definitely going somewhere."
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"DEBBIE: "Oh, no. I fell down.""
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"DEBBIE: Okay. FIONA: Arms up."
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"Once, ifl double bagged it. Project girls don't abort."
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"Okay, so if you remember it like this, the formula's completely visible."
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"-Physics? -Yeah, yeah."
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"Everybody continues..."
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"Uh, hang on. Karen, I'm--"
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"In the back of the car On the way to the bar"
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"That was fucking incredible."
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"A couple mil a year."
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"-Your face. -How is that funny? It's not even funny."
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"As quiet as it ever gets."
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"Slower, slower, slower."
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"[KNOCKING ON DOOR]"
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"TONY: Fiona, are you home?"
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"Wondering what your scheduIe's like on Friday."
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"Your dream girl? We had drunken sex on my kitchen floor."
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"Cerium, erbium, praseodymium."
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"Her room, I think."
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"What are you hiding for?"
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"Owl Jesus, Fiona."
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"Okay. Wiggle your toes."
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"Second cupboard above the sink, liquid ibuprofen, freeze spray, Ace bandages."
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"-"Steve"? No. -Yeah. Uh-huh."
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"What did I say? What did I tell you? Sow and thou shall reap."
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"Get fucked!"
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"STEVE [OVER PHONE]: Hello? -How much you pay for it?"
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"[IAN CHUCKLES]"
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"Oh, Jesus Christ, Lip."
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"...because he's done nothing to be sorry for. Nothing."
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"Gotcha."
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"Who paid for this?"
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"Hm?"
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"STEVE: What?"
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"-She better be dead, that bitch. FIONA: Cut it out!"
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"Four-month-old baby, 14-year-old girl just had her appendix out..."
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"-No. -Calypso-- Yes, calypso blue."
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"-Sterilization? -Continuity."
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"[KNOCKING ON DOOR]"
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