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Clips from Axe Cop - Babysitting Uni-Baby (S01E01)

"So he had tryouts and hired a partner."
Axe Cop
"So, uh, what do you want to do now?"
Axe Cop
"You know what?"
Axe Cop
"I don't like you. I'm gonna hide this"
Axe Cop
"Hey, Sockarang, look what I drew."
Axe Cop
"- We should go there! - I know."
Axe Cop
"See?"
Axe Cop
"Magic World is so magical, I could cry."
Axe Cop
"Not me, I never cry."
Axe Cop
"Intruders! Freeze, Magic Police!"
Axe Cop
"- Let's go watch! - I've got a better idea."
Axe Cop
"Ah!"
Axe Cop
"at our amazing magic show!"
Axe Cop
"This is ridiculous. Where are their wands?"
Axe Cop
"Make that hole filly well!"
Axe Cop
"Oh, see, now that's what I expect..."
Axe Cop
"Baba-shalell, make $100"
Axe Cop
"- We win! - You lose."
Axe Cop
"Ha ha!"
Axe Cop
"And good night."
Axe Cop
"Axe Cop, I just wanted to check in on Uni-Baby."
Axe Cop
"No, I hear because you're judging me."
Axe Cop
"Hey, I think we should go back home and check on Uni-Baby."
Axe Cop
"No. Send Chubby Doll back."
Axe Cop
"That way we can stay here in Magic World"
Axe Cop
"or $100 minus $15. So $85."
Axe Cop
"What could possibly happen?"
Axe Cop
"Ahhh, Stockarang!"
Axe Cop
"I hate babysitting."
Axe Cop
"Why won't Uni-Baby stop crying? It's so annoying."
Axe Cop
"Too bad. I don't want her pooping."
Axe Cop
"- Oh ho ho, I hear that. - Axe Cop, Axe Cop, come in."
Axe Cop
"But I think I know who is."
Axe Cop
"We are rich now!"
Axe Cop
"I'll chop your head-- oh no."
Axe Cop
"Look at this present we got you!"
Axe Cop
"So, Axe Cop,"
Axe Cop
"Aloha! We're back."
Axe Cop
"That'll be $15."
Axe Cop
"I will chop your heads off!"
Axe Cop
"music for parking in the dark while in rock creek park."
Axe Cop
"Seriously, we're out of gas."
Axe Cop
"Wait, what the--"
Axe Cop
"You just chopped my girlfriend's head off!"
Axe Cop
"Her real name was Poison Poison?"
Axe Cop
"Wow. Thanks, Axe Cop."
Axe Cop
"That's why I spy on people."
Axe Cop
"What do you want, Flute Cop? I'm on a night mission."
Axe Cop
"I'm sorry to bother you, but, uh,"
Axe Cop
"do you know how I've been saving my money to get $100?"
Axe Cop
"Well, guess what? I did it! Yeah."
Axe Cop
"So I was thinking of taking Anita"
Axe Cop
"So..."
Axe Cop
"Could you possibly babysit Uni-Baby for us?"
Axe Cop
"Uh, I can pay you $15."
Axe Cop
"I'll be right there."
Axe Cop
"Flute Cop's taking me to Hawaii."
Axe Cop
"- Isn't he romantic? - How would I know?"
Axe Cop
"I mean, can you think of a better place to go on vacation?"
Axe Cop
"- Yes. - Uh, so the baby food is in the fridge"
Axe Cop
"and the fresh diapers are in the dresser."
Axe Cop
"Oh, and don't mess with Uni-Baby's horn,"
Axe Cop
"um, as it holds great power."
Axe Cop
"- Okay, see you in a couple days. - Okay, see you later."
Axe Cop
"Bye-bye, little Uni-Baby. Mommy wuv you."
Axe Cop
"And don't mess with Uni-Baby's horn. It holds great power."
Axe Cop
"Gross!"
Axe Cop
"She already pooped."
Axe Cop
"I'm not feeding you any more food."
Axe Cop
"You poop too much. From now on"
Axe Cop
"you just get one small meal a day."
Axe Cop
"What the heck?!"
Axe Cop
"until your parents come home."
Axe Cop
"Babies are so dumb."
Axe Cop
"Sockarang on the telephone!"
Axe Cop
"Sockarang, I'm at Flute Cop's house babysitting."
Axe Cop
"Oooh, I love babies!"
Axe Cop
"I'll be right there."
Axe Cop
"Aw, man. Flute Cop has the best snacks."
Axe Cop
"I locked her in the closet because she poops and cries too much."
Axe Cop
"- Oop, smart. - Now let's look around the house"
Axe Cop
"and see if there's anything cool to play with."
Axe Cop
"I call it... Magic World."
Axe Cop
"- But how? - With... this!"
Axe Cop
"Great! Let's go to Magic World!"
Axe Cop
"- Oh wait, what about Uni-Baby? - She won't die."
Axe Cop
"- She ate a small meal. - We can't just leave her here alone."
Axe Cop
"No, but we can create cyborg versions of ourselves"
Axe Cop
"to watch over her."
Axe Cop
"I programmed the cyborgs to watch Uni-Baby"
Axe Cop
"and to punch her if she cries."
Axe Cop
"When I have a baby, you're babysitting."
Axe Cop
"Not unless you have $15, I'm not."
Axe Cop
"Run!"
Axe Cop
"We lost 'em."
Axe Cop
"The Magic Police are the slowest police."
Axe Cop
"Oh... my... gosh."
Axe Cop
"Cool!"
Axe Cop
"Ladies and gentlemen, prepare to be amazed"
Axe Cop
"And now for our first trick..."
Axe Cop
"Boo-ooo. They tore our historic tent!"
Axe Cop
"appear in every hand."
Axe Cop
"How did they do that?"
Axe Cop
"A thousand-pousand- papa-pa-pa-pow!"
Axe Cop
"This is an outrage."
Axe Cop
"Now they're richer than we are."
Axe Cop
"Let's kill them!"
Axe Cop
"Buy something that makes something invisible."
Axe Cop
"Yeah, that's a great idea. I know a guy--"
Axe Cop
"Wa-wa-wait, I see something I want."
Axe Cop
"Awesome!"
Axe Cop
"I chubby wubby you! Ha ha ha ha!"
Axe Cop
"Chubby Doll is the best."
Axe Cop
"- Yes, he is. - Come in, Axe Cop."
Axe Cop
"I'm trying, just give me a second."
Axe Cop
"You don't have to say anything. It's that look."
Axe Cop
"Axe Cop--"
Axe Cop
"and have even more fun."
Axe Cop
"I'm going to blow this baby's head off!"
Axe Cop
"- Do it! - What the heck?!"
Axe Cop
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