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Clips from The Golden Girls - Adult Education (S01E01)

"Traveled down the road and back again"
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"And if you threw a party"
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"Invited everyone you knew"
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"You would see the biggest gift would be from me"
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"And the card attached would say"
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"Ma, you OK?"
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"You get right back here and hit those books."
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"Easy? It's impossible."
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"- So, big shot, did you get the tickets? - Can't you say hello first?"
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"- No! - Oh, yes. I just don't know what to do."
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"Please, I beg you. Look..."
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"I should know. I'm 43 years old, and until today, I never even heard of 7B."
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"I was driving down Biscayne Boulevard, listening to WREQ, the big band station."
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"Rose Nylund, you get your bohonkus back in here"
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"It was that easy, just 'cause you said"
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"but I do know that my self-respect is more important than passing your damn course."
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"- Why, for two... - Wait! Dorothy..."
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"Oh, Blanche, we forgot. How did it go?"
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"Blanche, I hope you're not discouraged."
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"Thank you for bein' a friend"
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""Thank you for bein' a friend""
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"I don't want to miss my appointment at the beauty parlor."
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"In a minute. Dorothy's been trying to get through to the box office for 20 minutes."
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"I can't be late. The last time I was late, Ronald gave me the broken hair dryer."
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"I came out looking like Don King."
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"Ma, please. All my life I've wanted to see Frank Sinatra in concert."
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"I'm not getting off this phone until I get tickets."
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"What are you talking about?"
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"I took you and Gloria to see him at the Paramount Theatre."
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"I'll never forget it. From the second he stepped out on the stage,"
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"- I don't know, something happened. - You fainted. That's what happened."
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"I spent the rest of the evening in the ladies' room, trying to revive you."
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"Wasn't until a couple of years later that I got another chance to see Sinatra."
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"Stan bought tickets for my birthday."
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"But two weeks before the concert, he asked me for a divorce."
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"I got the house and the kids. He got the tickets."
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"Don't think I didn't put up a fight!"
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"Oh, girls, I have terrible news."
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"I failed my psychology exam. I'm just beside myself."
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"Oh, Blanche, look on the bright side. It's just one test."
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"Yeah, but this is my midterm. I could fail the whole course."
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"If I fail this course, I won't get my degree,"
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"and if I don't get my degree, the museum won't even consider me for that promotion."
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"Oh, I guess there's no bright side."
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"Calm down. You're gonna pass the course."
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"You're gonna have to buckle down and study a little harder."
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"At least you're doing well in your other two courses."
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"But those are art courses. They come easier to me."
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"I've always had a great appreciation for the arts and artists."
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"And carpenters and mechanics and delivery boys."
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"Yes? Yes, yes, yes, I'm still here."
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"Yeah, I'm calling about the Sinatra concert."
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"It's what?"
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"What, you've kept me on hold all this time to tell me that it is sold out?"
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"No, no, I will not have a nice day!"
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"Oh, darn! I was really counting on that concert."
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"Now what'll we do? Don't worry. I'll make some calls. I got connections."
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"I'll handle it. I'm gonna call a couple of ticket brokers."
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"Fine, big shot. Handle it. See how far you get."
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"I just remembered, I know somebody in show business who can help us."
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"My best friend in St. Olaf has a nephew who's a page at NBC in Hollywood."
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"I'll write to her and ask her to write to him."
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"Oh, I don't mind. I'm a very patient person."
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"I once waited two whole weeks for a sty to go away."
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"Every night, I'd close my eyes and I'd picture it getting smaller and smaller."
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"And one morning, I woke up and it was gone."
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"I'm fine. I'm just trying to make Rose go away."
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"Whose theory states..."
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""A young man becomes intimate with his mother to get revenge on his father"?"
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"Well, I don't know who said it, but my second cousin Arlen did it."
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"I am exhausted!"
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"I went to at least a dozen ticket brokers today."
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"They all told me the only way I'm gonna get tickets is to go to a scalper."
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"Oh, you can't buy from a scalper. That's a crime."
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"So is eating grapes at the supermarket, but you do that all the time."
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"- I have to test them. - Rose, one is testing, 14 is brunch."
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"Good lord, I'm a criminal."
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"Fine, as long as you already have a record, I can count you in."
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"Tomorrow I am going to a scalper and I'm going to buy four tickets."
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"You'd better make that three. My final exam is that night."
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"- Honey, that's too bad. - Oh, what difference does it make?"
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"My social life's gone down the drain anyway."
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"All I ever do is study."
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"You know, it cannot be good for you. It's unnatural, it's unhealthy, it's unlike me."
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"No wonder I can't concentrate. I need a break. I need a change of scenery."
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"I'll see you all later. Don't you girls wait up."
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"Hold it, Blanche."
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"I don't think you should go anywhere till you finish your homework."
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"Oh, I'll just be gone a few hours."
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"If you want a diploma, you have to apply yourself."
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"Do you think Bob Hope got all those degrees without studying?"
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"Rose, let me handle this."
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"Listen, Blanche, nobody said that going back to school would be easy."
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"I cannot pass that course. I just can't do it."
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"Listen, honey, if you're having such a problem,"
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"maybe you should talk to your teacher."
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"I can't do that. I'd be too embarrassed."
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"- But that's what teachers are there for. - I know exactly how she feels."
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"I used to be scared of my teachers, too."
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"- Get out of here. - No, it's true, it's true."
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"Elementary school was a nightmare. I was afraid to talk in class."
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"- Why? - Well, I had a slight speech impediment."
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"It's different for kids these days, you know. They have Barbara Walters to look up to."
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"Yeah, but in those days, it really stood out, you know."
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"Oh, I don't know, it must have taken three months"
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"before I could muster up the courage, you know, to talk to Mrs. Lenoff."
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"And it turned out to be the smartest thing I could have done,"
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"'cause not only did she help me, you know, with the speech problem,"
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"she was the one who inspired me to go into the teaching profession."
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"You know what? I think tomorrow after class I will talk to Professor Cooper."
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"Good girl."
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"What ever happened to your teacher Mrs. Lenoff?"
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"Oh, gosh. Last I heard, she retired from teaching,"
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"opened a bed and breakfast someplace in Wode Island."
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"Rhode Island."
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"- Professor Cooper? - Yes? What can I do for you?"
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"If I might have a minute of your time."
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"'Course, if now's not convenient, I can..."
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"No, no, please, please, sit. I'm all ears."
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"Don't sell yourself short."
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