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Clips from The Golden Girls - On Golden Girls (S01E01)

"Oh, wait now, Blanche, come on. I'm from New York. I did chores."
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"I made the beds, I washed the dishes, scoured the pots, cleaned the bathroom,"
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"folded the laundry, took out the garbage."
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"My, my. Did you attend a military school?"
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"No, she lived with me."
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"- Did they have chores in Sicily? - Are you kidding?"
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"They invented chores in Sicily."
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"- Rose, never mention Sicily. - Oh..."
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"I guess when I was little, I didn't have to do anything."
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"And I raised my daughter the same way."
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"So that's why David is the way he is now. So it's all my fault!"
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"Oh, now, Blanche. You can't blame yourself for David."
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"I am gonna give this list to David and see that he starts right away."
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"How is it possible to get pregnant in Sicily just by crossing the street?"
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"- Cheap Chianti and narrow streets. - Oh..."
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"If you wait a couple of minutes, I'll make you some sandwiches."
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"- Where you going? - I don't know."
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"How you getting there?"
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"- I'll take a bus. - I see."
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"And when the bus gets to you-don't-know-where,"
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"- what will you do then? - Get a job."
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"- Really? - Yeah."
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"As what, Secretary of State?"
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"- I gotta go. - So you're just gonna wimp out, huh?"
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"- I'm not wimping out. - What do you call this?"
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"Why should I stay here when I got all this crappy stuff to do?"
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"You know, first of all, buddy boy, life is full of crappy stuff to do."
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"It's everywhere, so you better get used to it. The President has crappy stuff to do."
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"Second of all, your grandmother happens to like you. My mother likes you."
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"She doesn't hit anyone unless she really cares. Take it from me."
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"And I happen to like you."
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"But you have a choice."
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"But right now you're here, and this doesn't have to stink."
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"And if you stay and work at it and everything turns out,"
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"- I just can't, like, come here whenever. - You can just, like, come here whenever."
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"Well, I don't mind the gardening. But it's, like, the vacuuming I hate."
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"- That's, like, for girls. - Well, we can renegotiate."
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"Come on, I'll fix you something to eat."
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"All right, now, attention, everyone. I want to propose a toast."
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"To Dorothy Zbornak, who got an A in her French class,"
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"Thank you, ladies and gentleman."
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"Or should I say, merci beaucoup. mes amies."
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"Oh, my, that was impressive!"
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"Jane Goodall once taught an ape to rhumba - that's impressive!"
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"Now, I would like to propose a toast."
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"To David, who in the past week has proven that he is one damn good kid."
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"You know, it's really been interesting."
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"I got hit, did chores, learned all about handicapped animals."
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"All in all, it hasn't been half-bad."
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"And if it's all right with you, I wouldn't mind living here full-time."
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"Oh, Mom and Dad will say yes. They'll be as happy with the idea as I am."
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"Well, I'm gonna get some ice cream."
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"Wait up! I'll show you where I hide the good stuff."
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"- I really think you should. - All right, I will."
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"I don't want to send him back to an unhappy home,"
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"but we're grandmothers."
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"It wouldn't be fair to be this old and have to raise children."
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"Hello, baby, it's Mama! Well, I'm fine, honey, I'm just fine."
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"I'm calling you about David. No, he's fine."
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"Matter of fact, he's so happy here, Janet, that..."
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"You heard me. He says that you and Michael spend so much time arguing,"
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"that you don't have time for him."
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"Don't you take that tone with me, missy."
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"But you let me tell you this. If you and Michael don't straighten up"
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"I will kick your uppity butt till hell won't have it again!"
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"She'll call us right back. She has to wake up the Yankee."
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"- Well done, Blanche. - Oh, absolutely. Nice bluff."
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"That was no bluff. I meant every word of it."
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"I would love to have a chance to raise David."
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"I might make up for the mess I made with Janet."
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"I still wish you'd let us drive you to the airport."
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"Oh, my cab's already here. Besides, I've seen the way you all drive."
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"Oh!"
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"It was nice of your folks to let you join them in Hawaii."
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"to start over from scratch, so the least you can do is meet them halfway."
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"- I'll try. - I bet it'll be easier than you think."
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"Especially now that you have an alternative."
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"If things get too tough at home, you can always come here and live with us."
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"- Well... - Bye, Grandma."
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"Bye, honey."
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"- Dorothy. - Bye, love."
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"Rose."
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"See ya, slugger."
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"Bye, darling. Bye."
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"Oh, I hope he's gonna be all right."
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"Oh, Dorothy that was so sweet of you, telling him he could come live with us."
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"I meant it!"
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"I'll say. No more listening to Dorothy snore!"
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"Ma, I do not snore!"
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"Please, I had to turn you from the window so you wouldn't inhale the drapes!"
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"I'm referring to Cary Grant. He's living in the broom closet."
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"Come on, I want you to meet my friends."
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"If I breathe and it bothers you, put a pillow over my face."
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"- It sure was nice. - It still is."
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"Take it easy, ladies. Don't get your support hose in a knot."
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"- They wouldn't listen. - I'm listening."
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"He might even start feeling good about himself."
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"you'll have a place to visit when the things at home really get to stink."
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"I'll do the vacuuming if you'II, like, learn English."
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"Call his mother!"
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"No, I don't suppose I can stop you if you insist on coming and getting him."
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"Run, run, run! Go."
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"Listen, I felt safe with you when you were three."
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"This is Sophia. Oh, we've just been so anxious to meet you!"
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"I thought you were in bed!"
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"David, you listen to me. They want the three of you"
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"What are you trying to do, pickle yourself so you'll live to be 100?"
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"That noise."
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"I would certainly have to discuss that with your parents."
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