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Clips from F is for Family - The Liar's Club (S02E02)

"That means I'm not providing. That means I'm not a man."
F is for Family
"Did you know I fought in a war? Oh, yeah. In Korea,"
F is for Family
"He kept yelling, "Those aren't mine! Those aren't mine!""
F is for Family
"- Fog of war, girls! - Oh, my God."
F is for Family
"I still can't eat kielbasa."
F is for Family
"And how am I rewarded?"
F is for Family
"With a TV show called M*A*S*H that turns the hell I went through"
F is for Family
"into a bunch of doctors playing fucking grab-ass in the Hollywood Hills!"
F is for Family
"All right, we got 30 minutes left."
F is for Family
"Let's make popcorn balls"
F is for Family
"♪ Come and get your love now ♪"
F is for Family
"♪ Come and get your love Come and get your love ♪"
F is for Family
"All right, baby!"
F is for Family
"You're listening to W-K-W-O-K FM. The Kwok! ****"
F is for Family
"Oh, turn that fucking light off!"
F is for Family
"Knock it off, you goddamn animals!"
F is for Family
"What kind of dildo gets a job that starts at five in the morning?"
F is for Family
"- Fuck you! - Why does your hand smell like butter?"
F is for Family
"I told you to knock it off! Now, shut up before you wake up your sister!"
F is for Family
"Dad, stop yelling!"
F is for Family
"Go back to sleep, angel! See what you pricks did?"
F is for Family
"It's Kevin."
F is for Family
"- he's... you know... - He's what?"
F is for Family
"- He's gonna want to fuck something. - Jesus, Frank!"
F is for Family
"I said you weren't gonna like it."
F is for Family
"- And you're gonna go today, right? - Oh, Sue."
F is for Family
"Honey, there's no shame in filing for unemployment."
F is for Family
"Sure there is. It's humiliating."
F is for Family
"Frank, focus."
F is for Family
"You paid into that system your whole life."
F is for Family
"And they have people who will help you apply for work."
F is for Family
"Yeah, shit work."
F is for Family
"I want to provide for this family, Sue. And I'm looking for a real job."
F is for Family
"Pogo couldn't have blackballed me at all of them."
F is for Family
"You almost killed him, Frank."
F is for Family
"And the only thing he can reach is his phone."
F is for Family
"I'm not making as much as you did at Mohican."
F is for Family
"Oh, Sue."
F is for Family
"Frank. Not now."
F is for Family
"Okay. Suit yourself."
F is for Family
"Gotcha! Pussy for a pussy!"
F is for Family
"Look at all this deadweight, suckling from Uncle Sam's tit."
F is for Family
"- I can get another baby. - I'm wearing rented shoes."
F is for Family
"Come on, Frank. Pucker up."
F is for Family
"It's me, Phineas! From the circus, remember?"
F is for Family
"- We're union brothers. - Oh, yeah, hey."
F is for Family
"We've been hitting elephants with shovels for years."
F is for Family
"But suddenly, you get a Democrat in office..."
F is for Family
"Anyway, great to see you, pal."
F is for Family
"He used to be the boss canvas man down at the airport,"
F is for Family
"pulling down some sweet alfalfa."
F is for Family
"Now he's kipping in clown alley with no aba-daba. Ain't you, Frank?"
F is for Family
"spit up your pride and admit it:"
F is for Family
""I'm a complete failure. I can't support my family.""
F is for Family
"I can't do this."
F is for Family
"Where you going, Frank? They're about to pass out lice combs."
F is for Family
"come up with a new and exciting product."
F is for Family
"- That sounds like a lot of work. - It's easy."
F is for Family
"All we do is slap some new names on the old product line,"
F is for Family
"and those pill-popping housewives won't know the difference."
F is for Family
"Excuse me, Tracy."
F is for Family
"I know it's not my place to interrupt, but I am a housewife."
F is for Family
"I'd like to throw my two cents in her."
F is for Family
"We always want input from secretaries."
F is for Family
""Ooh, ooh, look at me, I'm a girl! I'm entitled to my own opinion!""
F is for Family
"All right, settle down."
F is for Family
"It wouldn't kill us to listen to her. Go ahead, Sue."
F is for Family
"Thank you. Well, in my experience,"
F is for Family
"- Such as? - Oh, uh..."
F is for Family
"One extra mayo, one hold the mustard."
F is for Family
"♪ My love has no max capacity ♪"
F is for Family
"Reid Harrison, TV's Colt Luger!"
F is for Family
"♪ All the girls sing Here come banana man, hey ♪"
F is for Family
"♪ Eating cotton candy And thinking of Kristy ♪"
F is for Family
"Why the fuck am I watching this?"
F is for Family
"Oh, you are cancer."
F is for Family
"Mom, I did it! I'm fully employed as a mortician's assistant!"
F is for Family
"No, it isn't."
F is for Family
"Oh, shit, I fucked up."
F is for Family
"Oh, I fucked up."
F is for Family
"- Dad, are you crying? - Oh, Jesus!"
F is for Family
"- What the hell are you doing here? - What are you doing here?"
F is for Family
"We got out early. We had a teacher's meeting."
F is for Family
"It is 9:30 in the morning."
F is for Family
"It's one fucking lie after another with you, isn't it?"
F is for Family
"A real man doesn't lie!"
F is for Family
"- Because I'm your father! - God, I hate this house!"
F is for Family
"Good! Then give it to me in writing!"
F is for Family
"If you're not able to spell your name, just trace your hand!"
F is for Family
"I can't take this anymore!"
F is for Family
"My room sucks! I got no privacy!"
F is for Family
"Reading at a third grade level is affecting your school work,"
F is for Family
"you fucking dope!"
F is for Family
"I hate school! I'm not good at it!"
F is for Family
"I'm trying to write hit records so I can save the family,"
F is for Family
"but how can I do that with fucking Bill in the next fucking bed?!"
F is for Family
"Jesus, Kevin. Don't have a stroke."
F is for Family
"I'm an artist and I need room to blossom!"
F is for Family
"This isn't fucking about you!"
F is for Family
"Okay, look, you don't have to go back to school today."
F is for Family
"- Really? - Yeah."
F is for Family
"I did go to the employment office, but I didn't sign up."
F is for Family
"- Oh, man, I'm sorry. - It's okay."
F is for Family
"And look, I understand what you're going through."
F is for Family
"Well, I hated my dad."
F is for Family
"The fucking dog has his own house! There's no place for me!"
F is for Family
"- I love it. - Do you smell gas?"
F is for Family
"When you pour your coffee in it, the Rainbow Mug changes color,"
F is for Family
"thanks to the hundreds of chemicals in the plastic."
F is for Family
"You get all that, Sue?"
F is for Family
"- Yes. - Good."
F is for Family
"Now eat it, shit it out,"
F is for Family
"- Whose was it? Whose was it? - I'm just kidding, Sue."
F is for Family
"Put that in the bad idea folder."
F is for Family
"I'd like to put a bad idea in Sue's folder!"
F is for Family
"- How does he do it? - Okay, that's it."
F is for Family
"My kids happen to think I'm very cool, but enough is enough."
F is for Family
"Vivian! What's shaking, honey?"
F is for Family
"That type of language is crude and inappropriate"
F is for Family
"- for a professional setting. - Oh, thank God."
F is for Family
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