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Clips from The Office (2005) - Christening (S07E07)

"Oh, no, it's just that, if a vampire had to cough,"
The Office (2005)
"'Cause of the euro."
The Office (2005)
"Well, other things you can do to help cut down on the spread of disease"
The Office (2005)
"are to wash your hands regularly,"
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"Ah. and get your flu shot."
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"No. No, no. They will cost you your life."
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"Elaborate."
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"The worst thing you can do for your immune system is to coddle it."
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"They need to fight their own battles."
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"A simple bowl at every juncture"
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"Exposing yourself to germs..."
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"So by that rationale, if I had to sneeze, I should just sneeze on you."
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"Yes. I would welcome it."
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"The principle is sound."
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"To avoid illness, expose yourself to germs,"
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"I don't know why everyone doesn't do this."
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"Okay."
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"Cece's getting christened today."
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"Big day."
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"Everyone from work is here."
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"We weren't planning on that."
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"Nope."
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"And a top of the day to you, too, sir."
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"I hope you brought your pipes."
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"We're about to smoke the opium of the masses."
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"Oh, yes, doobie-doobie-doo."
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"because it's not a day for just Jim,"
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"And I thought we should all celebrate"
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"all jumping around and sucking on the teat."
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"Put them in a box, give them to my neighbors."
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"Yeah, I want kids."
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"For all your paper and printer needs."
The Office (2005)
"For all your paper and printer needs."
The Office (2005)
"Sunday church service. It's been a few years."
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"Hey. Hey."
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"Oh, Michael, this is just for family."
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"But I'm the godfather."
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"that can be confusing at a christening,"
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"Are you talking to me?"
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"Okay, Michael, um,"
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"I'm sorry, Michael. I need you to say it. I'm so sorry."
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"So who is the godfather?"
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"Old friend, like, you've known him since kindergarten?"
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"No, I have plenty of friends, so..."
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"All right, well, you have great seats. Enjoy the show."
The Office (2005)
"Okay. Thank you for coming, Michael."
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"And that's not true,"
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"Good morning."
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"What a terrific day this is,"
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"and not just because the Eagles are playing."
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"You may have seen the bus out front."
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"They're leaving for three months"
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"to build a school for the village of Quimixto in Cabo Corrientes, Mexico."
The Office (2005)
"I've heard of that place."
The Office (2005)
"If you go to Cabo San Lucas, all the prostitutes are from Cabo Corrientes."
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"Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope."
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"We hope for a speedy recovery."
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"Thank you."
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"Like Justin and his disfigurement,"
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"I would like to offer a 4% discount"
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"Christening calls to repentance,"
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"to faithfulness and to discipleship."
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"We've come to celebrate these babies."
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"Well, she can't bring this up with her."
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"All right, come on. Where are we going? Where are we going?"
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"We're gonna take a little field trip."
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"There's my girl. All right."
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"Oh, my... Oh, my God."
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"Cece, no. No, no, no. Not on the dress."
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"Honey, no. Yes."
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"No, no."
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"We have an extra outfit in the bag."
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"No. There's no extra outfit in the bag."
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"You said you checked it. I did"
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"At this time, will the families please come join me?"
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"They are totally gelling."
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"It's as if they leave my office and they go to another office"
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"And good for them."
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"That's great, because, you know,"
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"the paper industry's not gonna last forever."
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"Before we go, I'd like to remind everyone"
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"that the Halberts have been kind enough to host a reception next door"
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"immediately following the service."
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"Mmm. Mmm."
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"And, B, I think a more appropriate statement would be,"
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"For all their generosity of spirit,"
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"they password-protect their wireless?"
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"Opus Dei."
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"Hi. Good morning."
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"Good morning. Good morning."
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"Hello."
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"How are you? Good morning."
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"Good morning. Good morning."
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"I am feeling this."
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"I am loving these people."
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"I'm Doug McPherson, Davey's uncle."
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"Oh, well, Dave is an adorable baby."
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"Davey."
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"Well, this is intimate."
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"We weren't expecting this many people."
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"Nope. And we're gonna need"
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"But he should be your caterer, 'cause you're a little angel."
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"Why didn't your parents get you a caterer?"
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"'Cause they don't think."
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"Mmm! Don't listen to her."
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"to someone as cute as you."
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"I don't know. I'm just hungry."
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"Okay, well, you know what, everybody's hungry."
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"Sorry. I think I'm just hungry."
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"Oh, after you. Oh, no, after you."
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"No, I insist. After me."
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"I'm gonna use that one."
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"Have a good lunch. Thank you. You, too."
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"This is not the meal I was promised."
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"I'm going to have no energy for the rest of the day."
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"I canceled my plans to come to this thing and they repay me with this?"
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"You know what, guys? Let's just enjoy lunch."
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"With what? How?"
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"Sometimes, Michael."
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"Sometimes."
The Office (2005)
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