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Clips from Eastbound & Down - Chapter 2 (S01E01)

"Oh, just shut up and give me a hand with this shit. [ R ]"
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"You threw me in the fucking lake, Kenny. [ R ]"
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"I insist upon you using some sort of protection."
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"And besides, it's not just for my protection. [ R ]"
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"Pakistani?"
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"- That's what he told me. - Whoa."
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"I don't know. I guess they jumped them and rode off with it."
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"Wayne, keep that pistol aimed at the strike zone..."
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"All right. Fly as I say fly."
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"Just please work with me here."
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"I brought a shotgun and a bottle of Tanqueray..."
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"A humongous part about being a celebrity is cashing in on it..."
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"I am. I'm taking it."
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"We got beautiful cars. Beautiful surroundings."
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"- Oh, yeah. They are pretty hot, huh? - They're my closers."
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"- So if you happen to be a man... - Yeah."
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"I like how you work."
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"- We're having fun. - Okay."
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"But I'm also a businessman."
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"I'm talking about goddamn me in the store..."
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"Bringing in the customers, lubing the deals."
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"This must be my goddamn fucking lucky day."
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"Yeah."
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"And I think it would make this night a grand success."
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"And a blowjob."
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"- Fuck you. - Just kidding."
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"Take this serious, guys."
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"Masculine strength."
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"One, two, three."
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"He's one of our students here. He has brain cancer."
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"- I've never seen that kid. - "Spina diffia", I think."
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"...but it looks like your name is on the chaperon list."
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"You mean, "tonight" tonight?"
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"Yeah, I'm getting paid like 15 notes."
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"You don't have to get upset. I'm sorry I can't go to the dance with you."
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"I need you to give me a ride."
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"- I just need you to drive me around. - Why?"
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"Well, Schaeffer BMW is gonna pay me a shit-ton of money..."
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"All right. I'll drive you there and you can find your way back."
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"If you're gonna do this, you have to do it the full way."
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"Come on, you wanna give me a ride? Wanna be my personal chauffeur tonight?"
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"- Where? - Clegg, to the left, dude."
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"- Where? There? - The fucking place says Schaeffer BMW."
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"The ecstasy?"
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"No, dude. This is a real job."
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"It's not like teaching kids. You can't get fucked up."
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"All right! Kenny Powers is here, everyone!"
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"Kenny Powers. That's Kenny Powers."
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"- Turn around. Look at them, man. - Hey, how's it going, guys?"
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"Are you nervous tonight? You feel a lot of emotions?"
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"I feel 110 percent. Ready to move some BMWs tonight!"
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"Maybe a forkball?"
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"- Signing some balls? - Yeah."
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"- Let's do it. - Yeah. Scott."
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"Why don't you throw that on?"
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"- Put that on. - Right now?"
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"Easy. I don't play games like that."
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"Well, Kenny, my name's Kevin Hickman and I want you to know..."
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"That's great. There you go, sport. Take a hike."
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"...I was wondering if maybe you might burn one down the middle for me."
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"I got Polynesian sauce all over my fingers from eating these goddamn egg rolls."
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"Nonsense! Come on, man!"
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"Yeah, come on!"
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"Hell with that. Smoke that fool."
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"Sorry, sorry. I can't do it. Not gonna do it. Can't do it."
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"Throw the damn ball."
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"Come on, it's been that long, huh?"
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"- No. - Forget your trade?"
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"Come on, it's a simple motion, just like that."
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"How about this: Roll it on the ground, pretend like it's a bowling ball?"
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"Come on. These people wanna see a show and I don't wanna be embarrassed."
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"I thought you were a baseball pitcher."
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"- I am a ball player. - Are you?"
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"Clegg!"
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"Doing what? Giving Robocop a blowjob?"
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"My friends are here. They're..."
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"Now you're gonna dance with her?"
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"Hey, everybody really turned it out for Phillip tonight, don't you think?"
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"Pretty... All right."
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"I'm a professional ball player."
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"I need to be around people who understand that."
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"What a better place for me to say my love than surrounded by little angels?"
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"- You doing okay there, Kenny? - I'm fine."
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"It was the egg rolls, not the ecstasy."
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"Okay. Well, we're gonna get you a ride home, all right?"
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"Well, we raised a lot of money for Phillip tonight, huh?"
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"Oh, okay. Well, why don't you come with me, Kenny?"
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"I'm going home."
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"Well, see you Monday."
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"But then you take a little time off from being unstoppable..."
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"...just to regroup and relax..."
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"All right, Stevie Janowski."
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"Can we go to Ashley Schaeffer BMW first?"
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"A rubber for your mouth. It's not that big of a deal, okay?"
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"Yeah, but I mean, it's a lake."
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"I decided to go for that birdbath your dad put in there just..."
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"...and how it's trying to butt-fuck me back here."
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"That way, in case one day you're not famous..."
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"- Pretty nice showroom you got. - Thank you. We have a lot of pride."
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"...Scott will finger you with his penis."
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"That's the kind of fun and games we have around here."
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"And you're trying to lure costumers in with a caveman spinning a sign around."
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"...could go for an overhaul in the advertising spokesman game."
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"And I think it'll only cost you 2 grand."
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"They're gonna spot me"
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"Oh, fuck me!"
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"Spot me, goddamn it!"
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"Yo, what's happening over here with the babes?"
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"Whatever the fuck any of that stuff is, I don't know him."
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"Okay, well, Kenny, I hate to burst your bubble..."
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"No, I'm not. I'm just saying your name is on the chaperon list."
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"Goddamn it, Kenny, I'm brushing my teeth."
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"Now, close the door. Get the fuck out of here."
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"Turtle-walk your ass out of here. Thanks for nothing."
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"I don't need you going fucking maverick on me."
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"All right, it's up here on the left."
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"All right, here we are."
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"Oh, yes, he is. Yes, he is."
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"...is more indicative of the Kenny Powers rebel persona."
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"...give us a little display of that God-given talent?"
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