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Clips from South Park - A Very Crappy Christmas (S04E04)

"Stan! Go get the other guys and tell them to meet me at the bos stop in ten minutes!"
South Park
"It's Mr. Hankey! He hasn't shown up yet."
South Park
"Aw, Jesus Christ! I'm going back to bed."
South Park
"Kyle, I have a full day of watching TV tomorrow."
South Park
"I don't have time to go on a poo hunt right now, okay?"
South Park
"If you guys want thre to be a Christmas, you'd better come help me!"
South Park
"Dude, you sneezed on my back!"
South Park
"Oh, sorry, you might get some germs while you're walking around in human feces!"
South Park
"Hey, look. Hello?"
South Park
"Oh, no I'm fine, Kyle."
South Park
"But where have you been? Things aren't the same without you."
South Park
"I know, Kyle. I've just been awfully busy with my family. Honey!"
South Park
"Boys, I want you to meet my wife. Autumn."
South Park
"Howdy-hey kids! Would you like a drink?"
South Park
"Hey haa, it's Christmas!"
South Park
"Our daughter Amber."
South Park
"And our son, Simon."
South Park
"Eee, hey! Hnhn."
South Park
"Heh What? Dad? Huh?"
South Park
"Nothin', Simon."
South Park
"I know, it's like it doesn't matter anymore."
South Park
"I'm sending the nuggets up tomorrow to spread Christmas cheer!"
South Park
"Anything for more presents!"
South Park
"You boys wanna bet me I won't take off my clothes?"
South Park
"Honey, pleh, you're--you're drunk. Onkay?"
South Park
"But it's a Chrstmas party!"
South Park
"Honey, can we go inside for a second?"
South Park
"Well, it's decided, kids."
South Park
"Tomorrow we're gonna bring back the spirit of Christmas!"
South Park
"Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas, you guys!"
South Park
"Only three shopping days until... God-damnit!"
South Park
"Hey! Merry Christmas, asshole!"
South Park
"Nobody's paying any attention."
South Park
"Ew, I almost stepped in it."
South Park
"Well, it was a good effort, boys. But I'm gonna have to close shop."
South Park
"Nobody's buyin' anything an' I can't afford to keep this furnace runnin'!"
South Park
"This is hopeless."
South Park
"And in other news tonight it appears that everyone is officially SICK OF CHRISTMAS!"
South Park
"In an SPC poll, 38% said they were fred up and tired of the holiday,"
South Park
"5% said they were indifferent to it,"
South Park
"and a whopping 57% they would quick Bon Jovi square in the balls if given the opportunity."
South Park
"Well, I think people are just fed up with the crowded shopping and the credit-card bills, uh."
South Park
"I, I think that the holiday just has become a joke."
South Park
"You know, it's just that a lot of people don't really"
South Park
"So what's to celebrate?"
South Park
"Well, the holiday spirit may be gone from South Park,"
South Park
"but at least our faith in each other remains strong."
South Park
"Dude, change the channel. This is too depressing."
South Park
"Good Grief! We need a Christmas tree for our play."
South Park
"Alright, everyone, we've got to get on with our play!"
South Park
"Jesus, this sucks! All they keep doin' is dancing around!"
South Park
"My mom could make a better Christmas special than this!"
South Park
"Hey, that's it. Oh, my God, that's totally it! It's so simple!"
South Park
"What, dude?"
South Park
"own animated Christmas special, and showing it to everybody in town!"
South Park
"We don't know anything about animation."
South Park
"Hey yeah! We can make a little animated Santa Claus and Jesus,"
South Park
"Ogh! This is terrible, Johnson!"
South Park
"Our whole town's economy is going right in the toilet!"
South Park
"We've got to get everybody back in the Christmas spirit!"
South Park
"Meugh. Send them in."
South Park
"You do?"
South Park
"can watch and and play it on the screen at the old drive-in."
South Park
"It'll have everything. Jesus, Santa."
South Park
"And when people see it, they'll just HAVE to get in the spirit."
South Park
"An animated Christmas card."
South Park
"Kids, that just may be the dumbest idea I've ever heard, ever!"
South Park
"But at this point I'm willing to try anything."
South Park
"Alright!"
South Park
"You guys go tell Butters to start making the cutoouts."
South Park
"I'm gonna go tell Mr. Hankey the good news!"
South Park
"Now you put that vase down! Put that vase down!"
South Park
"That's a very expensive vase! Don't you throw that vase!"
South Park
"Ah, Mr. Hankey?"
South Park
"Oh, Kyle! Hoowwddy ho!"
South Park
"We got the money, Mr. Hankey. We're gonna make our animated Christmas card."
South Park
"We've gotta all go get that old drive-in workin' again."
South Park
"That's not the only thing we gotta get workin' again, if you know what I mean..."
South Park
"Good luck, Kyle. And we'll have that projector workin'! Don't you worry!"
South Park
"What's the matter, Cornwallis?"
South Park
"Alright, Butters. Let's see what you've got."
South Park
"Well, alright. Here's a little paper construction of Santa Claus."
South Park
"Ho ho ho, uh, there-a kid. Hu-uh, would you like some toys and stuff?"
South Park
"Huh, and here's the cutout versions of you guys."
South Park
"They kind of look like us."
South Park
"I mean, Stan's got blue eyes and I've got a sharper nose, but I mean, they kinda look like us."
South Park
"I AM NOT THAT GODDAMNED FAT!"
South Park
"Woh, ah, hey! I made a little cutout version of me, too!"
South Park
"Ih in case you need it for your animated film."
South Park
"See ya!"
South Park
"Uh-m, alright, alright then."
South Park
"Oh, uh, hello, good-lookin'? What's your name?"
South Park
"Well, Butters, would you like to slap my titties around?"
South Park
"Cornwallis, we've got to go fix up the drive-in."
South Park
"I don't want to, Dad. I'm too sad."
South Park
"It's not that, father. Its... Well, I don't feel like I'm really a part of Christmas."
South Park
"But son, you're a Hankey. We love Christmas!"
South Park
"Come on, it's time to sit around the tree!"
South Park
"God-damnit it's Christmas and we're gonna be a happy family around the tree!"
South Park
"Alright, now, just go help the other kids; they can't get their stockings up.""
South Park
"That's not the only thing that can't get up around here."
South Park
"Why? We're just pieces of crap. Christmas isn't for us."
South Park
"Christmas is about feeling good. That's for everybody!"
South Park
"All the Christmas movies: Santa, elves, reindeer. No poo. I'm not a part of it."
South Park
"No, you're not a part of it, Carnwallis. You're all of it. Don't you see?"
South Park
"I'm nothing but crap!"
South Park
"Everything that lives on earth poos in some way"
South Park
"Cause it's eaten by cattle, which is eaten by women and men"
South Park
"And that poo goes through the sewer, where it's dumped into the sea."
South Park
"And then that bigger fish with the poo still inside"
South Park
"By the grizzly bear that poos on a dead piece of sand"
South Park
"So it can spring to life and become food for the land"
South Park
"The grass is eaten by the cattle, which comes out the other end"
South Park
"But how can I be that giraffe and blade of grass, and a human?"
South Park
"Just like your heart beats without you thinking about it,"
South Park
"I think I see now."
South Park
"So I'm the leg of a leopard and the wings of a hen"
South Park
"Okay, here's the script. But it doesn't have an ending."
South Park
"No ending? Well, we can't animate until we have our voices recorded,"
South Park
"Okay, talk directly in the mike and don't hit any hard p's."
South Park
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