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Clips from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt - Kimmy Goes to a Hotel! (S02E02)

"♪ Oh, the weather outside... ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(KIMMY) I had to invite Mimi."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"She had no place to go on Fake Christmas."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm married!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Sonja?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"He says he's been working late,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"like Freddy Krueger, but romantic,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"but with the same sweater."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm watching you, Kimmy, and you never know where I am"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"♪ It's a miracle ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"♪ But females are strong as hell ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"♪ It's a miracle ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"♪ Unbreakable ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(SINGERS) ♪ Damn it ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"You're a worse actor than Cate Blanchett."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Is she?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(SIGHING)"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(SCOFFS)"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"What's eating you, sweetheart?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Yeah, take it."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Now that I know how you really feel about me..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Ah, Sonja."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"You know what?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm gonna find me an ice cream shop"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I am not coming in to work on my day off."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"so we need you to cover his shift."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Why didn't I get an audition for that?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"out of my children's mouths."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Please excuse the sling."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I can't discuss it due to an ongoing lawsuit,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"but... the door said push."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"All right, let's get to the matter at hand."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm not giving anything to those whiners!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"so he could turn it into a dress."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I had an empanada con queso in the car."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"in this 1936 photo of the family home."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"What... No, they're standing in front of the painting."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I like him!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"to Harry Wiener and his late wife, Ivana Eda-Wiener."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Well, we could either give the painting back,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"You should see him peel an orange."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"It's..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"pretty..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"What..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(MELANCHOLY MUSIC)"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Well, this is some Fake Christmas."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Dong?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"How did you fit in Rat Alley?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Why did you take the fall for me with Sonja?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"You are such a good person, Kimmy."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"and dream of when I am divorced in two years."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I can't live like this."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"- Run away with me! - What?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"But where would we go?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"On three."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"One, two, three."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Wait, I'm shift manager?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"The most boring of all the shapes!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(SIGHS)"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(CHOKING)"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I... I can't afford to do that."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"That painting was all I had left."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Oh, God."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Well, at least then I can cancel my insurance policy."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Well, of course."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"to Harry Wiener and his daughter, Anita Wiener-Statt."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I know a guy who makes things happen."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"This is better."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"♪ ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(FAUCET GURGLING)"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"to preserve prostatic fluid, bathe at your own risk"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"And I'm the old man with the shovel."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"- Raid the candy machine! - Lose my American virginity."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Oh, yeah!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"but I can offer you a complimentary waffle."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Please hold forever."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(GLASS SHATTERING)"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(BOTH CHUCKLING)"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"with beds..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"We don't have to."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Why do you think I packed this fancy nightgown?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"- Ah! - Oh, I'm so sorry!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm going to kiss you now."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"♪ ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Hey, Titus, since you're the manager now,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I don't care about..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm calling Lillian's guy."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I fail."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(FERN) It's her voice mail, Virgil."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I was in the paper!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I found a leaf that looked like January Jones."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Oh, we forgot to tell you."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I cut that leaf to look like her."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Call us when you can, dear."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Dawson's Creek!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"This is because you carried my bag off the bus."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"This is because you taught me how to drive."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"sound like some sort of... (SIGHS) McDonaldland gift card"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"and I know it's gonna tighten up one day."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(SIGHS) Whatever."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"none of the rest of that stuff really matters."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(RICK) Good news!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"You mean I have to do this job forever?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Hello, Troylus Cressibo, star on the rise!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"right down to the six-pack abs."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"What will become of me if I keep this up?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Spirit, are you saying that's what I'll turn into"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"All gray and wrinkly and everyone hates me?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"My loyal servants."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"If I'm reading this right,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"any of your emails, Peter."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"(GASPING)"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"No!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"How are you?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"were mouth-breathers."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"John Merrick, whom you may know better as the Elephant Man."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Look, I'm not the bad guy here, okay?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Really?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Well, then who is?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Kimmy did this to me."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
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