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Clips from The Detour - The Tub (S02E02)

"- Why? - What?"
The Detour
"- What'd that douche call you? - Petirroja."
The Detour
"- Oh, God. - It's really chilly in here."
The Detour
"What?"
The Detour
"Is that like a chicken? Bawk bawk!"
The Detour
"- Bawk ba-gawk! - Oh, my God."
The Detour
"Cock bock a-doodle do!"
The Detour
"I thought she was turning her face."
The Detour
"- Mm. - No, I mean, everybody..."
The Detour
"- His wife makes the money. - I figured."
The Detour
"I... worked for my father."
The Detour
"All right, make room for the cock bock, everybody!"
The Detour
"I even tried the rhythm method once."
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"I love them, but it sucks."
The Detour
"Anything we want."
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"Just tell her."
The Detour
"How far along are you?"
The Detour
"You're gonna need to enjoy every second of it,"
The Detour
"Yeah."
The Detour
"Am I right?"
The Detour
"I mean..."
The Detour
"Good Lord! Oh, my..."
The Detour
"My body could not withstand your straight white male energy,"
The Detour
"This? It's a nighty."
The Detour
"In your hand?"
The Detour
"- We're out of condoms. - Don't worry about it."
The Detour
"Okay."
The Detour
"- No. Mm. - What?"
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"What am I doing? I'm being sexy."
The Detour
"Oh, everything's sexy about irresponsibility."
The Detour
"Come on. Just stick it in, stick it in."
The Detour
"Actually, the withdrawal method,"
The Detour
"Well, then it must be..."
The Detour
"Must be true."
The Detour
"- What? - Hold on. Just give it to me."
The Detour
"- No. - What are you talking about?"
The Detour
"Ugh!"
The Detour
"Oh! Oh-ho-ho."
The Detour
"Aren't they?"
The Detour
"and then take a piece of the hair"
The Detour
"and put some tape on it and put it in a book."
The Detour
"trying to pick up a quarter off a glass table!"
The Detour
"- Okay. - Baby, baby, baby,"
The Detour
"Mama needs a fresh new baby head to smell."
The Detour
"I'll get a sock. Just a mess."
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"You got it, babe."
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"Ohh!"
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"I'm slipping!"
The Detour
"- Oh, yeah. - Oh, uh, no."
The Detour
"Ohh."
The Detour
"Just think of that little baby, that cute little baby,"
The Detour
"Get out!"
The Detour
"No, thank you."
The Detour
"So, vasectomy?"
The Detour
"Oh, hey."
The Detour
"- Thank you. - I was..."
The Detour
"So, how far along are you?"
The Detour
"8 1/2 months."
The Detour
"- Oh. I love babies. - Mm."
The Detour
"Never wanted to have more?"
The Detour
"Lots of reasons."
The Detour
"'Cause they're awful?"
The Detour
"Babe, I really don't want to go to this party."
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"It's one flight up."
The Detour
"come home, order pizza,"
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"and... you know what."
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"- Why now? - What do you mean "Why now?""
The Detour
"I don't know. 'Cause you're bent over with your mouth open"
The Detour
"and you're not wearing a shirt."
The Detour
"I know, but you can't grind me from behind"
The Detour
"when I've got something sharp next to eyeball."
The Detour
"Let's just stick to the original plan."
The Detour
"Oh, no, Petti... Pet..."
The Detour
"but "jhey" are red."
The Detour
"What? You don't like my cheating accent, mang?"
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"My cheaty, cheaty accent?"
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"Yeah, actually, I kind of do."
The Detour
"Really? 'Cause it's complete bullshit."
The Detour
"Can you make it quick?"
The Detour
"- Oh, I can make it really quick. - Okay, go. Go, go."
The Detour
"Yeah, okay. Let's go. Okay."
The Detour
"I just folded those!"
The Detour
"Where you going?"
The Detour
"- I have to pee right now. - Hold it."
The Detour
"- Fine, fine, fine. - Here we go, here we go."
The Detour
"No! What are you getting under the covers for?"
The Detour
"It's so cold. It's freezing in here."
The Detour
"- Did you lock the door? - Oh, shit, no."
The Detour
"- No one's watching. - Ugh, this guy is."
The Detour
"- Let's go, let's go, let's go. - Wait, wait."
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"Now what?"
The Detour
"- I have to brush my teeth. - No, it's fine."
The Detour
"- I don't care. - I had hummus, baby."
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"You know what? It is cold."
The Detour
"It's been a while."
The Detour
"Okay. Okay."
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"Let's go, let's go, let's go."
The Detour
"- Oh, no. - Oh, geez."
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"Hey, the door's stuck."
The Detour
"Go away, please!"
The Detour
"Jared invited Chase over to watch a movie."
The Detour
"Good, good, good, good. New friends. That's great, babe."
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"Open the door!"
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"Hey, just... just give us like a minute and a half, okay?"
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"What's going on? What's going on?"
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"Sorry."
The Detour
"Are you guys having sex?"
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"No! We're just..."
The Detour
"- Are you wrapping presents? - No!"
The Detour
"That's the only two times the door is locked."
The Detour
"You know, she's been ignoring me for a week,"
The Detour
"and now she wants to talk to me."
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"She is such a cock-blocker."
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"What's a cock bocker?"
The Detour
"Oh, my God. What?"
The Detour
"- That's really thin walls. - Really thin walls."
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"My chicken's not that good."
The Detour
"Jared, come help me cock bock!"
The Detour
"- Oh, my God. - Cock bock!"
The Detour
"Cock bock!"
The Detour
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