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Clips from ALF - It Isn't Easy... Bein' Green (S01E01)

"I liked aunt mabel."
ALF
"Forget it, kid. You're spittin' in the wind."
ALF
"You're going to make a great celery stalk."
ALF
"He's an asparagus. Oh."
ALF
"Before the last rehearsal."
ALF
"Let's go over the song before spencer gets here."
ALF
"What d'you care what spencer says?"
ALF
"I don't like him. He's mean."
ALF
"I'm sure spencer has some fine qualities."
ALF
"You said the kid was fungus!"
ALF
"I know, 86 the alien."
ALF
"I'll try."
ALF
"Wow! Can i look at it?"
ALF
"From your father? Is he back in town?"
ALF
"But he told her to."
ALF
"Where is it?"
ALF
"Right over here."
ALF
"Here's material i've written to open the act."
ALF
"Brian, you want to come try this."
ALF
"Let's see if you get it right this time."
ALF
"Asparagus?"
ALF
"♪ will make you body strong and lean ♪"
ALF
"♪ our flavor can't be .. ♪"
ALF
"Guys, we're trying to do this together."
ALF
"It takes a lot of cooperation."
ALF
"Let's try it at the refrain."
ALF
"Let me do it for you."
ALF
"♪ asparagus, asparagus ♪"
ALF
"♪ put us on your table ♪"
ALF
"♪ asparagus, asparagus ♪"
ALF
"You changed it!"
ALF
"I changed it. This has more impact."
ALF
"Nobody knows who aunt mabel..."
ALF
"You're the writer."
ALF
"♪ put us on your table ♪"
ALF
"♪ asparagus, asparagus ♪"
ALF
"No priests, no rabbis, and no ministers!"
ALF
"No, spencer, the song stays as it is."
ALF
"Ready?"
ALF
"I don't want to go."
ALF
"Honey, it will be a lot of fun."
ALF
"All your friends will be there."
ALF
"William, may i have a word with the boy?"
ALF
"Alf, he's our son. We'll handle this."
ALF
"I know that spencer bothers you,"
ALF
"But you can't let that stop you."
ALF
"I don't care. I don't want to. I'm scared."
ALF
"Hyperventilates..."
ALF
"I'll wait in the car."
ALF
"If you really don't want to sing,"
ALF
"We'll just sit and watch."
ALF
"Take your costume in case you change your mind."
ALF
"Let's get in the car."
ALF
"So brian, you going to sing?"
ALF
"Not exactly, but we are going."
ALF
"I think i've got a fix on the kid's problem."
ALF
"Mind if i talk to him alone, for a minute?"
ALF
"Come on over here, pal."
ALF
"We'll be in the car, brian."
ALF
"We are pals, aren't we? Yeah."
ALF
"What's the problem?"
ALF
"It's that spencer guy, isn't it?"
ALF
"Let me tell you a story"
ALF
"Someone i grew up with on melmac."
ALF
"Nice kid; handsome,"
ALF
"Your name's really gordon?"
ALF
"It was my mother's maiden name, all right? Sorry."
ALF
"It was opening night. There was a full house."
ALF
"When suddenly, i froze."
ALF
"I was like this."
ALF
"Just go with me on this, okay?"
ALF
"The audience was getting hostile."
ALF
"They were ready to throw bread sticks,"
ALF
"When the guy who played don quixote,"
ALF
"Pulled me aside and gave me this good luck charm."
ALF
"A tooth? Yeah!"
ALF
"His 124 year molar."
ALF
"I got through my song, "the impossible dream,""
ALF
"And every other song in the show."
ALF
"For an encore i did a couple from "gypsy.""
ALF
"Yeah, but will it work on asparagus songs?"
ALF
"No problem!"
ALF
"Don quixote says it works on vegetables, too."
ALF
"Just stick it in your back pocket."
ALF
"You'll go out there and knock 'em dead."
ALF
"Great! I will."
ALF
"Thanks, gordon."
ALF
"Oh, no."
ALF
"Hello, jack rabbit delivery service?"
ALF
"I'm looking at your ad in the yellow pages."
ALF
"Now, we'll take a short break, while we air out the stage."
ALF
"Okay guys, come on."
ALF
"It's gone! What's gone?"
ALF
"My lucky tooth! I can't go out there!"
ALF
"I give you the aspara-Guys."
ALF
"I want you to go out there and do those jokes."
ALF
"Oh, boy! My big break!"
ALF
"I'm trying to understand this tooth business."
ALF
"You'll be going to the franklin elementary school."
ALF
"None, just a tooth."
ALF
"Hello?"
ALF
"A kid walks into the principal's office.."
ALF
"The principal says, "my gosh how did this happen?""
ALF
"The duck says, "it started as a growth on my foot.""
ALF
"Is this an audience or an oil painting."
ALF
"No matter how special the tooth may be,"
ALF
"Why not?"
ALF
"Courage doesn't come from a thing."
ALF
"From in you."
ALF
"If you can sing with a lucky charm,"
ALF
"You can sing without one."
ALF
"You won't mess up, son."
ALF
"What about spencer?"
ALF
"They don't hate you. They just don't understand comedy."
ALF
"What's it going to be, guys?"
ALF
"I'm not going."
ALF
"You are? Yeah, i don't think i can remember it."
ALF
"And i say, "we'll make your body strong and lean,"
ALF
"Right, dad?"
ALF
"Right."
ALF
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