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Clips from Veep - Morning After (S05E05)

"Amy, Amy, I just need to talk to you for one second."
Veep
"I've got a very big question."
Veep
"I can't go to Nevada. I'm sorry."
Veep
"I have thought about this a lot."
Veep
"What do you think of Candi Caruso"
Veep
"to head up Nevada for me?"
Veep
"Oh, yeah."
Veep
"I hear just excellent things about her."
Veep
"- Harvard Law Review. - Right."
Veep
"She clerked for Justice Tenny."
Veep
"- Politico 's 30 under 30. - That's right."
Veep
"She's still under 30. She looks older, but..."
Veep
"- You like her? Yeah. - Yes."
Veep
"I mean, if you want a super smart woman"
Veep
"who's young and brilliant, then why not?"
Veep
"Yeah, I really want that."
Veep
"I really do."
Veep
"Look, regardless of the recount, this could mean big things for zucchini."
Veep
"Yeah, good. We'll talk later. Bye."
Veep
"Hey, Danny boy. Saw you on TV last night."
Veep
"- Nicely done. - Yeah. Thank you."
Veep
"That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about."
Veep
"- Uh-huh. - See, I need to make some changes."
Veep
"Can you just let me hold on one quick second?"
Veep
"- Yeah. - Shoot off this text. Sorry, go ahead."
Veep
"- You were saying? - I was."
Veep
"I was saying that I really enjoyed my time here."
Veep
"- Oh, good. - And I've learned so much from you."
Veep
"That's good to hear."
Veep
"- Sorry about that. - Go ahead, take that."
Veep
"- Yeah? - Yeah."
Veep
"- It's from you? - Is it?"
Veep
"- I'm fired? - Yes, get out."
Veep
"We are doubling down on O'Brien,"
Veep
"so you're basically as useless to me as a 40-year-old woman."
Veep
"Okay, well..."
Veep
"Oh, interesting. Getting something back from you."
Veep
"Oh, You can't fire me, I quib."
Veep
"You know it's supposed to say quit."
Veep
"Well, I just fired you anyway. You can't quib, you rebard."
Veep
"Ma'am, someone opened a Twitter account for the pimple."
Veep
"- What? - It's called POTUS."
Veep
"- Pimple of the United States. - Okay."
Veep
"There are 220,000 followers as of five minutes ago."
Veep
"How many Twitter followers do I have?"
Veep
"Approaching that."
Veep
"Is there anything not fucked up that you can tell me right now?"
Veep
"Well, the symposium on race is all set for this afternoon."
Veep
"Oh, good. Well, that'll be a hoot."
Veep
"Oh, czar she blows. Excuse me, gentlemen."
Veep
"...with the press on Sundays."
Veep
"- Hey, Tom. Excuse me. - Madam President."
Veep
"- How are you? - I am good."
Veep
"- So you're up to speed on Nevada? - Uh-huh."
Veep
"- And the markets now. - I saw that."
Veep
"My God. Which brings me to my point."
Veep
"Um, I would like to officially offer you..."
Veep
"No, no, no, no."
Veep
"- ...the position of economy czar. - Nope, nope, nope."
Veep
"Thank you, but no."
Veep
"Why not? You would be in charge of the economic crisis."
Veep
"No, I would be blamed for the economic crisis."
Veep
"Tom, stop it. You wanted to be Treasury Secretary."
Veep
"Remember? I don't see how this is any different than that."
Veep
"Well, respectfully, Madam President, I hope you do"
Veep
"because if the President of the United States"
Veep
"can't tell the difference between Treasury Secretary"
Veep
"and stock market patsy, that's pretty disturbing."
Veep
"Then you accept?"
Veep
"Madam President, it is a huge honor,"
Veep
"but I have to balance that against my need not to do it."
Veep
"Tom, I'm asking you"
Veep
"as the President of the United States."
Veep
"And, respectfully, I am declining."
Veep
"I'm not picking up any respect."
Veep
"But you're getting the declining?"
Veep
"Do you know what Candi Caruso's real name is?"
Veep
"It's Candice. And she changed it to Candi with an I."
Veep
"If she does that to her own goddamn name,"
Veep
"how the hell is she going to handle a potential recount?"
Veep
"Good morning, Amy. This is the president's schedule,"
Veep
"which, incidentally, Ms. Caruso is on right now."
Veep
"- Oh, I'm aware. - Oh, good morning, ma'am."
Veep
"- Good morning. - Hey, ma'am..."
Veep
"Okay, I see you. You stay away from my face."
Veep
"I hear you, but this is a family recipe from my aunts in Savannah"
Veep
"and they swear by it for skin problems and migraines."
Veep
"Mm-hmm."
Veep
"Chickpea based, Tabasco, with just a dash..."
Veep
"All you're doing right now is making me hungry."
Veep
"So why don't you do something about that?"
Veep
"Sure, sure."
Veep
"- Snack. - Uh-huh, yeah."
Veep
"Amy, did you need me for anything?"
Veep
"- No. I'm just chilling. - No? Mmm."
Veep
"I think the most important thing in terms of strategy"
Veep
"is controlling the narrative."
Veep
"Oh, I have a saying. If you're explaining, you're losing."
Veep
"Absolutely. I'm right on board with you."
Veep
"- Excuse me, Madam President. - Amy."
Veep
"Have... have you met Candi?"
Veep
"Hi, it's Candi with an I."
Veep
"Amy with a Y. Which is correct."
Veep
"We are right in the middle of an interview"
Veep
"with an exceptionally wonderful candidate for coordinating Nevada."
Veep
"Ma'am, it's just gonna take a second."
Veep
"- Apologies. I'll be right back. - Absolutely."
Veep
"- I got you a snack. - Oh, yeah, give me that."
Veep
"That's a great dress."
Veep
"Oh, thank you."
Veep
"- Size two? - Um..."
Veep
"Ms. Caruso, the president sends her apologies,"
Veep
"but the position has been filled."
Veep
"- Ooh. - Right this way."
Veep
"Okay."
Veep
"And if I need more clothes, then I'll have you or Mom send them."
Veep
"Yeah, fine, bye. Richard."
Veep
"- What's this? - You know Jonah. He works for me."
Veep
"In fact, you two used to date, but you never got over him."
Veep
"Not Jonah. Why is baby with a beard here?"
Veep
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