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Clips from Auntie Mame

""I, Edwin Dennis, being of sound mind and body..."
Auntie Mame
"...do hereby bequeath to my only son, Patrick, all my worldly possessions."
Auntie Mame
"In the event of my demise, I direct Norah Muldoon to deliver Patrick..."
Auntie Mame
"...to my sister, Mame Dennis, at 3 Beekman Place, New York City."
Auntie Mame
"His expenses shall be supervised by Mr. Dwight Babcock..."
Auntie Mame
"...acting for the Knickerbocker Bank..."
Auntie Mame
"...with the power to keep my crazy sister..."
Auntie Mame
"...from doing anything too eccentric and bringing him up to be like her."
Auntie Mame
"Since I am in splendid condition through workouts at the Brokers Club..."
Auntie Mame
"...I am confident that these provisions won't go into effect for years."
Auntie Mame
"I hereby affix my hand this fourteenth day of September, in the year 1928.""
Auntie Mame
"You've been reading it for a week. Why bring it to New York?"
Auntie Mame
"It's the only way I can believe it."
Auntie Mame
"Besides, your Aunt Mame may like it as a remembrance of your sainted father."
Auntie Mame
"Don't you be going by way of the North Pole. We're not greenhorns."
Auntie Mame
"- That's 95 cents. - Here's a dollar. Keep the change."
Auntie Mame
"It's like the ladies' restroom in the Oriental Theater."
Auntie Mame
"You're not scared, are you, Norah?"
Auntie Mame
"Of course not! And don't you be, child. Norah's here to look after you."
Auntie Mame
"Saints alive!"
Auntie Mame
"- You want? - Is this the residence of Mame Dennis?"
Auntie Mame
"Mame Dennis. Oh, yes!"
Auntie Mame
"I'm Norah Muldoon. I'm bringing Dennis to his aunt."
Auntie Mame
"Oh, you come in. You wait. I fetch."
Auntie Mame
"Madam having affair now."
Auntie Mame
"Isn't he wonderful?"
Auntie Mame
"Help is on the way, darlings."
Auntie Mame
"That adorable bootlegger is on his way with a gallon of gin."
Auntie Mame
"Oh, Allen, darling! Edna, I called you yesterday."
Auntie Mame
"- Hello, Mame. - I'll be with you in a minute."
Auntie Mame
"- Vladimir, what are you doing here? - Drinking myself to death, of course."
Auntie Mame
"Besides, I'm your guest of honor."
Auntie Mame
"Of course! You must hear his new symphony, the pastorale."
Auntie Mame
"It has real airplane motors and live sheep. It's devastating."
Auntie Mame
"You've met our guest of honor, Vladimir Klinkoff? Miss..."
Auntie Mame
"Mrs. Klinkoff."
Auntie Mame
"Yes, of course. Then you've met. Oh, Perry!"
Auntie Mame
"Doris, now where are you off to?"
Auntie Mame
"Everyone's going to Clifton's. It's nearly 7."
Auntie Mame
"Give Clifton my love. I'll be right over..."
Auntie Mame
"Oh, dear. The employment bureau didn't tell me you were bringing a child."
Auntie Mame
"He looks nice. If he misbehaves, we can toss him in the river."
Auntie Mame
"Please let us escape from this den of criminals."
Auntie Mame
"Doctor, get this woman on your couch in a hurry!"
Auntie Mame
"I'm not that kind of a woman. I'm looking for a Miss Mame Dennis."
Auntie Mame
"- Ito! lto! - Yes, missy."
Auntie Mame
"Show this woman to the kitchen, start her on glasses."
Auntie Mame
"- This not dishwashing lady. - Then I must have invited you. A drink?"
Auntie Mame
"I'm Norah Muldoon. Didn't you get my telegram saying we'd arrive at 6:00?"
Auntie Mame
"No, your telegram said October 1. That's tomorrow. This is September 31."
Auntie Mame
"No, 'tis the first, curse the evil day."
Auntie Mame
"Everybody knows 30 days has September, April, June and..."
Auntie Mame
"But, darling, I'm your Auntie Mame!"
Auntie Mame
"Quiet, everybody. I have an important announcement to make."
Auntie Mame
"This is my little boy!"
Auntie Mame
"He's not really my little boy. He's my late brother's son."
Auntie Mame
"My only living relative. That's all we have, just each other, my little love!"
Auntie Mame
"Well, what am I going to call you, dear?"
Auntie Mame
"- Pat. Patrick Dennis. - I know the Dennis part."
Auntie Mame
"And from now on, you must call me Auntie Mame. Well, well, well, now."
Auntie Mame
"Would you like a mar...? No."
Auntie Mame
"Is it your bedtime? No, it can't be. The powder room?"
Auntie Mame
"Food, food! That's it! You must be famished. Come right along with me."
Auntie Mame
"Take your shoes off, darling. It's like removing your hat in America."
Auntie Mame
"Before sukiyaki, a little hors d'oeuvre."
Auntie Mame
"- Could I try some of that jam? - Jam?"
Auntie Mame
"- That blackberry jam? - Of course."
Auntie Mame
"Actually, it's sort of a fishberry jam. It's called caviar."
Auntie Mame
"Now, some pickled octopus, raw fish tails..."
Auntie Mame
"- It's salty, but I like it. - Good. You have wonderful taste."
Auntie Mame
"Vera!"
Auntie Mame
"Vera, this is my little boy. Patrick, I want you to meet a star."
Auntie Mame
"A great lady of the theater and my dearest friend, Vera Charles."
Auntie Mame
"- Hello! - How do you do?"
Auntie Mame
"She just loves little boys."
Auntie Mame
"- Who's he? - That's a Lithuanian bishop."
Auntie Mame
"Doesn't speak a word of English. Stimulating man! Oh, Your Grace."
Auntie Mame
"He's a darling and so worldly for a man of God."
Auntie Mame
"Everything in the universe is composed of the elements of Aristotle."
Auntie Mame
"Thus man is fire, dust and air mingled with water."
Auntie Mame
"Acacius, darling, this is my nephew Patrick."
Auntie Mame
"This is Mr. Page, dear."
Auntie Mame
"That means "Know thyself." Mr. Page is an educator."
Auntie Mame
"He runs a school where they do advanced things."
Auntie Mame
"You think you might find room for Patrick?"
Auntie Mame
"For him, yes! In this boy, I see already the fire, dust and air."
Auntie Mame
"Add water and stir. Would you want to go there?"
Auntie Mame
"- Do they wear uniforms? - At my school, we wear nothing."
Auntie Mame
"It's heaven! lt'll stimulate his psyche and stir up his libido."
Auntie Mame
"- What's libido? - It's perfectly simple. It..."
Auntie Mame
"I'll tell you what we'll do."
Auntie Mame
"Every time you hear a word you don't understand, dear, write it down."
Auntie Mame
"Later, I will explain it."
Auntie Mame
"- I'm off, Mame. - Lindsay! Lindsay, this is Patrick."
Auntie Mame
"Patrick, I want you to meet Lindsay Woolsey, the publisher."
Auntie Mame
"- Circulate, darling. Circulate! - New man in your life?"
Auntie Mame
"Little Patrick! Guess I won't see much of you."
Auntie Mame
"We'll go to the zoo, the aquarium, the Philharmonic."
Auntie Mame
"We'll be together constantly, the three of us!"
Auntie Mame
"That's exactly what I had in mind."
Auntie Mame
"- Good night, Mame. Thanks. - Watch it, Phyllis."
Auntie Mame
"- Some party! - So good of you to come."
Auntie Mame
"You played beautifully. I can't thank you enough."
Auntie Mame
"Goodbye, Mrs..."
Auntie Mame
"Of course. There you are, my little love."
Auntie Mame
"Come here with your Auntie Mame and sit down a minute."
Auntie Mame
"We'll really get to know each other."
Auntie Mame
"Well, now, read me all the words you don't understand."
Auntie Mame
""Libido, inferiority complex, stinko, blotto..."
Auntie Mame
"...free love, bathtub gin..."
Auntie Mame
"...monkey glands, Karl Marx." Is he one of the Marx Brothers?"
Auntie Mame
"No, dear."
Auntie Mame
"She last pretty good tonight. Marie Antoinette room again?"
Auntie Mame
"Yes. Perhaps she'll wake up without a head."
Auntie Mame
"- Get that dog of a dress off her. - Me tuck her in."
Auntie Mame
"Is the English lady sick?"
Auntie Mame
"She's not English. She's from Pittsburgh."
Auntie Mame
"- She sounded English. - She has to do something."
Auntie Mame
"Now, where were we?"
Auntie Mame
""Narcississistic, Lysissistrata..."
Auntie Mame
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