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Clips from Cheers - Sam Turns the Other Cheek (S03E03)

WHERE IT'S STRICTLY DOG-EAT-DOG.

"WHERE IT'S STRICTLY DOG-EAT-DOG."

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ONE FIDO BURGER COMING UP.

"ONE FIDO BURGER COMING UP."

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NORM, CAN I HAVE YOUR EAR FOR A SECOND? SURE.

"NORM, CAN I HAVE YOUR EAR FOR A SECOND? SURE."

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DESPITE MY BUILDING INSPECTOR'S PROTEST,

"DESPITE MY BUILDING INSPECTOR'S PROTEST,"

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I'VE DECIDED TO PUT A BID ON YOUR HOUSE.

"I'VE DECIDED TO PUT A BID ON YOUR HOUSE."

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HERE IT IS.

"HERE IT IS."

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I'M AFRAID THAT'S GONNA HAVE TO BE MY TOP OFFER.

"I'M AFRAID THAT'S GONNA HAVE TO BE MY TOP OFFER."

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WHOA! YOU GOT YOURSELF A DEAL.

"WHOA! YOU GOT YOURSELF A DEAL."

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HEY! WHAT?

"HEY! WHAT?"

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YEAH. HEY, EVERYBODY, I SOLD THE HOUSE.

"YEAH. HEY, EVERYBODY, I SOLD THE HOUSE."

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WAIT TILL I TELL VERA.

"WAIT TILL I TELL VERA."

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I CAN LOOK AT THAT PLACE WITH THE POOL ROOM.

"I CAN LOOK AT THAT PLACE WITH THE POOL ROOM."

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WAIT, NORMIE. THAT'S AN EIGHT THERE.

"WAIT, NORMIE. THAT'S AN EIGHT THERE."

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EIGHT? I THOUGHT IT WAS A TWO.

"EIGHT? I THOUGHT IT WAS A TWO."

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AT LAST, ENGLISH-SPEAKING NEIGHBORS.

"AT LAST, ENGLISH-SPEAKING NEIGHBORS."

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HEY, NORM, THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT THIS HOUSE I DON'T KNOW.

"HEY, NORM, THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT THIS HOUSE I DON'T KNOW."

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JUST WHAT IS IT?

"JUST WHAT IS IT?"

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THE MARKET VALUE.

"THE MARKET VALUE."

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THAT PAPER'S NOT NOTARIZED THERE, NORM.

"THAT PAPER'S NOT NOTARIZED THERE, NORM."

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IT WAS AN HONOR MEETING BOSTON'S NEWEST HERO, SAM.

"IT WAS AN HONOR MEETING BOSTON'S NEWEST HERO, SAM."

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OH, THANKS.

"OH, THANKS."

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ANYBODY EVER TELL YOU YOU WERE LIKE GARY COOPER?

"ANYBODY EVER TELL YOU YOU WERE LIKE GARY COOPER?"

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YEP.

"YEP."

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GOOD NIGHT. GREAT PLACE.

"GOOD NIGHT. GREAT PLACE."

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THANK YOU. THANKS VERY MUCH.

"THANK YOU. THANKS VERY MUCH."

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WHAT A NIGHT.

"WHAT A NIGHT."

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200 BUCKS IN TIPS.

"200 BUCKS IN TIPS."

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WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO WITH ALL THAT MONEY, CARLA?

"WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO WITH ALL THAT MONEY, CARLA?"

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I'M GOING TO SPEND IT ALL ON MY KIDS.

"I'M GOING TO SPEND IT ALL ON MY KIDS."

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GOOD GIRL.

"GOOD GIRL."

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HOW MANY GUNNYSACKS AND ONE-WAY TICKETS

"HOW MANY GUNNYSACKS AND ONE-WAY TICKETS"

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YOU THINK IT WILL BUY?

"YOU THINK IT WILL BUY?"

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GEE, I DON'T KNOW, CARLA.

"GEE, I DON'T KNOW, CARLA."

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AW, COME ON, WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT FOR?

"AW, COME ON, WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT FOR?"

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NEVER MIND.

"NEVER MIND."

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COME ON. WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?

"COME ON. WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?"

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YOU'RE LIVING A LIE, SAM.

"YOU'RE LIVING A LIE, SAM."

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OH...

"OH..."

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I KNOW YOU WON'T LISTEN TO ME,

"I KNOW YOU WON'T LISTEN TO ME,"

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BUT OUR PARENTS WERE RIGHT

"BUT OUR PARENTS WERE RIGHT"

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WHEN THEY SAID NO ONE PROFITS BY DECEIT.

"WHEN THEY SAID NO ONE PROFITS BY DECEIT."

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SORRY, DIANE.

"SORRY, DIANE."

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BUT TONIGHT'S RECEIPTS ARE MAKING TOO MUCH NOISE.

"BUT TONIGHT'S RECEIPTS ARE MAKING TOO MUCH NOISE."

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I CAN'T HEAR YOU.

"I CAN'T HEAR YOU."

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OK.

"OK."

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I HONESTLY DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO,

"I HONESTLY DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO,"

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BUT I MUST SAY, I'M A LITTLE DISAPPOINTED.

"BUT I MUST SAY, I'M A LITTLE DISAPPOINTED."

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OH. YOU SURE YOU DON'T WANT TO HANG AROUND AND GET NAKED

"OH. YOU SURE YOU DON'T WANT TO HANG AROUND AND GET NAKED"

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AND ROLL AROUND IN ALL MY MONEY?

"AND ROLL AROUND IN ALL MY MONEY?"

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YOU'RE NO FUN ANYMORE.

"YOU'RE NO FUN ANYMORE."

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HELLO AGAIN, SAM.

"HELLO AGAIN, SAM."

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HELLO, MARVIN.

"HELLO, MARVIN."

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HOW YOU DOING?

"HOW YOU DOING?"

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WELL, THIS THING HAS TURNED OUT PRETTY GOOD FOR YOU,

"WELL, THIS THING HAS TURNED OUT PRETTY GOOD FOR YOU,"

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HASN'T IT, SAM? UH, YEAH.

"HASN'T IT, SAM? UH, YEAH."

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SAW YOU ON TV.

"SAW YOU ON TV."

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OH, YEAH?

"OH, YEAH?"

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THERE YOU WERE--

"THERE YOU WERE--"

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THE SCUM WHO WAS MESSING AROUND WITH MY WIFE.

"THE SCUM WHO WAS MESSING AROUND WITH MY WIFE."

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THEY'RE TREATING YOU LIKE YOU'RE SOME KIND OF HERO.

"THEY'RE TREATING YOU LIKE YOU'RE SOME KIND OF HERO."

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YOU WANT TO STOP POINTING GUNS AT ME, MARVIN?

"YOU WANT TO STOP POINTING GUNS AT ME, MARVIN?"

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SAM--

"SAM--"

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DON'T MIND ME. JUST CARRY ON AS IF I--

"DON'T MIND ME. JUST CARRY ON AS IF I--"

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HEY, HEY! YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE!

"HEY, HEY! YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE!"

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COME ON, MARVIN. LET HER GO, WILL YOU?

"COME ON, MARVIN. LET HER GO, WILL YOU?"

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WHAT, SO SHE CAN CALL THE POLICE?

"WHAT, SO SHE CAN CALL THE POLICE?"

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THE POLICE?

"THE POLICE?"

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OBVIOUSLY, SIR, YOU DON'T KNOW ME.

"OBVIOUSLY, SIR, YOU DON'T KNOW ME."

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I STRONGLY BELIEVE

"I STRONGLY BELIEVE"

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THERE IS FAR TOO MUCH GOVERNMENT INTERFERENCE IN OUR LIVES AS IT IS.

"THERE IS FAR TOO MUCH GOVERNMENT INTERFERENCE IN OUR LIVES AS IT IS."

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ALL RIGHT, GET BACK HERE.

"ALL RIGHT, GET BACK HERE."

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THIS IS CRAZY!

"THIS IS CRAZY!"

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I WAS ALREADY SHOT ONCE BECAUSE OF YOU. I MEAN, WE'RE EVEN.

"I WAS ALREADY SHOT ONCE BECAUSE OF YOU. I MEAN, WE'RE EVEN."

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OH, NO, SAM.

"OH, NO, SAM."

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WE'RE NOT EVEN. NOT YET.

"WE'RE NOT EVEN. NOT YET."

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I CAN'T SLEEP.

"I CAN'T SLEEP."

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I CAN'T EAT.

"I CAN'T EAT."

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I CAN'T WORK!

"I CAN'T WORK!"

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ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT IS YOU AND MY WIFE.

"ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT IS YOU AND MY WIFE."

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DIANE, ISN'T THAT A RUN IN YOUR STOCKING?

"DIANE, ISN'T THAT A RUN IN YOUR STOCKING?"

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OH, MY. YOU'RE RIGHT.

"OH, MY. YOU'RE RIGHT."

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WHAT A NASTY RUN. LOOK AT THAT.

"WHAT A NASTY RUN. LOOK AT THAT."

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JUST PUT SOME NAIL POLISH ON IT.

"JUST PUT SOME NAIL POLISH ON IT."

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I DON'T THINK THAT WILL WORK

"I DON'T THINK THAT WILL WORK"

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ON A RUN THIS LARGE

"ON A RUN THIS LARGE"

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AND HIGH UP ON ONE'S THIGH, DO YOU, MARVIN?

"AND HIGH UP ON ONE'S THIGH, DO YOU, MARVIN?"

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LOOK, SHUT UP!

"LOOK, SHUT UP!"

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HE-YAH! OOH.

"HE-YAH! OOH."

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JUST WORKING A CRAMP OUT.

"JUST WORKING A CRAMP OUT."

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THERE YOU GO.

"THERE YOU GO."

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YOU'D BETTER NOT TRY THAT AGAIN.

"YOU'D BETTER NOT TRY THAT AGAIN."

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DON'T WORRY.

"DON'T WORRY."

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MOVE. OVER HERE.

"MOVE. OVER HERE."

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EXCUSE ME, MARVIN.

"EXCUSE ME, MARVIN."

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UH, LISTEN TO ME.

"UH, LISTEN TO ME."

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YOU'RE HAVING TROUBLE WITH YOUR MARRIAGE, AREN'T YOU?

"YOU'RE HAVING TROUBLE WITH YOUR MARRIAGE, AREN'T YOU?"

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BELIEVE ME, I UNDERSTAND HOW YOU FEEL.

"BELIEVE ME, I UNDERSTAND HOW YOU FEEL."

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COME ON, NOBODY UNDERSTANDS HOW I FEEL.

"COME ON, NOBODY UNDERSTANDS HOW I FEEL."

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I DO!

"I DO!"

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OH, SURE, SURE.

"OH, SURE, SURE."

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YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE WITH TRASH?

"YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE WITH TRASH?"

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YES!

"YES!"

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THIS DISGUSTING PILE RIGHT HERE.

"THIS DISGUSTING PILE RIGHT HERE."

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SAM?

"SAM?"

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EXACTLY.

"EXACTLY."

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HE'S TRASH.

"HE'S TRASH."

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BUT I...

"BUT I..."

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I LOVE HIM WITH ALL MY HEART.

"I LOVE HIM WITH ALL MY HEART."

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WHY?

"WHY?"

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BECAUSE...I GOTTA.

"BECAUSE...I GOTTA."

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YOU TELL ME, WHY DO YOU LOVE HER?

"YOU TELL ME, WHY DO YOU LOVE HER?"

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BECAUSE NEITHER ONE OF US CAN HELP IT.

"BECAUSE NEITHER ONE OF US CAN HELP IT."

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BUT I'M ASKING YOU AS A FAVOR,

"BUT I'M ASKING YOU AS A FAVOR,"

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FROM ONE SUCKER TO ANOTHER,

"FROM ONE SUCKER TO ANOTHER,"

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DON'T WASTE MY FELLA.

"DON'T WASTE MY FELLA."

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SAM, IS THIS TRUE? YOU AND HER--

"SAM, IS THIS TRUE? YOU AND HER--"

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OH, YEAH, YEAH. ABSOLUTELY.

"OH, YEAH, YEAH. ABSOLUTELY."

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I DON'T DESERVE HER, BUT THEN, WHO DOES, HUH?

"I DON'T DESERVE HER, BUT THEN, WHO DOES, HUH?"

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AND WHAT DO WE GET FOR LOVING 'EM?

"AND WHAT DO WE GET FOR LOVING 'EM?"

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A PUNCH IN THE FACE, A KICK IN THE GUT,

"A PUNCH IN THE FACE, A KICK IN THE GUT,"

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