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Clips from The Neighborhood (2018) - Welcome to the Hero (S03E03)

"I hope Que's still here. [grunts]"
The Neighborhood (2018)
"My bladder's about to burst."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Well, it's your own fault."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"I've never seen a restaurant cut a guy off"
The Neighborhood (2018)
"from bottomless lemonade."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"It's a medical thing."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Dry tongue runs in my family."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Hey, Calvin, Dave. What's up?"
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Uh, your toilet seat in about three seconds."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Eh, sorry about that, Que. I'm still potty training him."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"[chuckles] When I did that with my dog,"
The Neighborhood (2018)
"I used to whack him with a rolled-up newspaper."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"[laughs] I tried that. It didn't work."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"[laughs]"
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Oh, sorry, man, we're closed."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"I'm not here for a haircut."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"I'm here for the money. Now hand it over."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"[scoffs]What?"
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Why would he give you any money?"
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"Because right now I'm asking nicely."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Oh. I mean, he did ask politely."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Well, don't just stand there, Que. Do something."
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"Good call."
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"See ya!Seriously?"
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"If you didn't cut my hair for free, I would change barbers!"
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"All right, you."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Empty the cash box."
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"No problem. After what he just did,"
The Neighborhood (2018)
"I'd give you the tip jar, too."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"Ooh, that feels much better."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"And who put my phone number above the urinal?"
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"Uh, uh, Dave?"
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"Oh, hey. Dave Johnson."
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"You just stay right there."
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"[chuckles] Don't worry, I washed my hands."
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"He doesn't care about your hygiene, Dave."
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"He's here to rob the place."
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"Oh. Well, in that case, uh, I take my handshake back."
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"Get over there with your friend."
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"I think you mean best friend."
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"Dave,"
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"now is not the time."
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"Okay, all right, well,"
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"let me just go over here so I can..."
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"powder your nose! [screams]"
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"Quick, Calvin, call the police!"
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"I will. But first let me grab his gun."
The Neighborhood (2018)
"What... He has a gun?"
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"Dave, get over here and hold him down!"
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"Okay! [yelping]"
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"Thank God this happened after I peed."
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"♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪"
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"♪ Welcome to the hood."
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"So then the cops came, they took the dude away"
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"and asked us for our statements."
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"Yeah, which was hard for me to give,"
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"because my dry tongue came back with a vengeance."
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"[scoffs]"
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"I still can't believe you guys got robbed at gunpoint."
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"I'm just so glad you're both okay."
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"Yeah, me, too. Aw, baby."
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"I don't want you going back to the barbershop."
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"I'll cut your hair from now on."
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"Thanks, babe, but I'd rather take my chances with the gun."
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"It's so cool what you did, Dad."
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"You're like Batman, except with a much lamer car."
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"It was not that big a deal, and, Grover,"
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"there is nothing lame about a reliable hatchback"
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"that gets 30 miles to the gallon."
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"Y-You know what? Grover's right."
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"You're a hero, Dave."
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"Just because you got a boring car"
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"and an unintimidating physique"
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"and a pretty squeaky voice, uh..."
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"w-where was I going with this?"
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"Uh, well,"
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"I think you were complimenting me."
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"Oh. Yes. Right."
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"Look, the point is is I owe you one."
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"[laughs softly]"
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"Well, in that case, why don't you finally let me"
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"teach you to play Frisbee golf?"
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"Like I told Tina, I'd rather take my chances with the gun."
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"Oh, hey, Gemma."
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"Hi, Marty."
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"You know, it's pretty crazy what happened"
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"to Dave and my dad last night, huh?"
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"Crazy? More like horrifying,"
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"or terrifying or "I didn't sleep a wink"-ifying."
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"Oh, so school principals can just make up words now?"
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"I'm just so freaked out."
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"I know they're okay, but I keep imagining"
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"all the things that could've gone wrong."
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"You know, I do the same thing whenever I'm thinking"
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"of asking a girl out, but it always winds up okay."
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"Really?"
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"Yeah, 'cause I never do it."
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"[laughs]"
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"Ugh, I just wish there was something"
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"that could help me take my mind off of it."
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"Well, if you want, you can come help me"
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"work in my vegetable garden."
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"I always find it's relaxing.You do?"
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"Yeah, it's peaceful, quiet, it helps me clear my head."
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"All right, I'll give it a shot."
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"Great."
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"It'll be fun-tasterrific."
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"Nice try, Marty,"
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"but leave the fake-titious words to the professionals."
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"Hey, hey, y'all. Here's the man of the hour."
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"And I also brought Dave."
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"[cheering]"
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"Whoa, I wasn't expecting all this."
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"Looks like word spread pretty fast."
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"Yeah, almost as fast as Que ran his ass out of here"
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"when he saw that gun."
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"[laughter]"
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"Hey, I ran to call the cops,"
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"'cause I just get better phone reception"
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"hiding underneath my bed."
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