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Clips from Flight of the Conchords - Bowie (S01E01)

"Okay, band meeting. Jemaine?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Yes. Bret?"
Flight of the Conchords
"What do you mean no?"
Flight of the Conchords
"You're obviously here so I'm putting you down..."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Yeah, get on. - All right."
Flight of the Conchords
"Murray, present."
Flight of the Conchords
"Item one: Roll call."
Flight of the Conchords
"We'll just look and see that you're here and carry on."
Flight of the Conchords
"But there's been a couple of times where you haven't been here."
Flight of the Conchords
"All right? And I've put you down as "absent""
Flight of the Conchords
"- Yeah, twice. I mean... - When?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Well, it doesn't matter when. They didn't go very well."
Flight of the Conchords
"Item two,"
Flight of the Conchords
"Now we need to get some better photos done"
Flight of the Conchords
"so that the American media can take us seriously, all right?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Put us in magazines, leaflets, that sort of thing."
Flight of the Conchords
"We've got a good photo."
Flight of the Conchords
"- I like that one. - It's a good photo."
Flight of the Conchords
"I mean, who are all these other people?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Well, that's Gemma's 21st. - Right."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Oh no, that's Nick. - Is that not you?"
Flight of the Conchords
"You've circled Lucas and Nick."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Who are they? - They're my cousins."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Yeah, I took it. - So you're not in it?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- It's got a good energy. - I know, I tell people that,"
Flight of the Conchords
"but they want to know which ones are you,"
Flight of the Conchords
"Have you got any other photos?"
Flight of the Conchords
"We've got one more. This one's just bizarre."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's a photo of Jemaine with his ex-girlfriend Clea."
Flight of the Conchords
"But it's got a photo of Bret superimposed over the head."
Flight of the Conchords
"- It's a wee bit strange. - Where did you get that?"
Flight of the Conchords
"I made it. I made this one."
Flight of the Conchords
"You can't take my personal photos and stick other people's heads over..."
Flight of the Conchords
"I mean, this one here, you're not in."
Flight of the Conchords
"but you shouldn't be."
Flight of the Conchords
"So my point is, what we need to do"
Flight of the Conchords
"is what's called a..."
Flight of the Conchords
"photo shoot."
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's a passport camera. Only Greg can touch it... eh, Greg?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Uh, yeah. - I can't even touch it."
Flight of the Conchords
"That's good, Bret."
Flight of the Conchords
"Jemaine, you look depressed. Smile."
Flight of the Conchords
"But what about your hands in the air and smile?"
Flight of the Conchords
"I've seen that. I've seen musicians do that."
Flight of the Conchords
"- That's gymnasts, Murray. - Is it?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Yes."
Flight of the Conchords
"Greg, is is musicians or gymnasts that?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Gymnasts. - When they..."
Flight of the Conchords
"okay, it looks weird."
Flight of the Conchords
"Um, Bret, you look quite small."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, I think it's your fault, Bret. You're just too small."
Flight of the Conchords
"Bret, do you, uh, do you like penguins?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Sometimes I'm glad that we don't live in New Zealand anymore."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Remember how there'd be penguins? - Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"- What's wrong? - I'm feeling a bit body conscious."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Are you bulimic or something? - No."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Is that what's made you bulimic? - No."
Flight of the Conchords
"I just need to eat more."
Flight of the Conchords
"I'm not bulimic."
Flight of the Conchords
"Hey, Bret, do you remember that time after your mom's 60th birthday,"
Flight of the Conchords
"- how you got really drunk? - Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"being a little bit bulimic."
Flight of the Conchords
"You could give me some compliments. That would do it."
Flight of the Conchords
"- You want me to give you a compliment? - That'd be great, yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"Don't worry about it. I'm gonna go to bed."
Flight of the Conchords
"Bret? Bret?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- What are you doing? - It's not Jemaine."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's 1972 David Bowie from the Ziggy Stardust tour."
Flight of the Conchords
"No, I'm David Bowie."
Flight of the Conchords
"This is a dream, Bret."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's all part of your freaky dream."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Oh, right. - Am I freaking you out, Bret?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Is this a freaky dream? - I've had some pretty freaky dreams."
Flight of the Conchords
"but with my face."
Flight of the Conchords
"I was a giraffe, but then..."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, okay. Listen, Bret, I don't have much time, man."
Flight of the Conchords
"People used to give me crap about being thin all the time."
Flight of the Conchords
"Throw their invites away."
Flight of the Conchords
"I want to give you one more piece of advice."
Flight of the Conchords
"Get an eye patch, man."
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ Wear the funky funky eye patch. ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Bye, Bret. - Bye-bye, David Bowie."
Flight of the Conchords
"There's the full range. Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Okay, see you soon. - Hey, Murray."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Hi, guys. - Hey, Murray."
Flight of the Conchords
"Page eight, I've bookmarked it there."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Hey. - Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"We're in it. Did you stick that on there?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- No, it's real, Jemaine. - Wow."
Flight of the Conchords
"- This photo... looks silly. - Silly?"
Flight of the Conchords
"You look silly now. That's a good photo... what do you mean?"
Flight of the Conchords
"All right? I'm dealing with the business side of things."
Flight of the Conchords
"Like that photo. That's got us some heat."
Flight of the Conchords
"We've got a big meeting coming up."
Flight of the Conchords
"No, it's the next best thing. It's a company that sells greeting cards."
Flight of the Conchords
"- They put a tape in there? - No."
Flight of the Conchords
"and they want us to be part of their magic cards."
Flight of the Conchords
"is just keep cool heads. Bret,"
Flight of the Conchords
"all right, don't be bulimic;"
Flight of the Conchords
"Jemaine, you know, look after Bret;"
Flight of the Conchords
"and me, just don't blow this one, I guess."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Mmm. - So all of us, let's rock it out."
Flight of the Conchords
"Is that a music term, "Rock it out"?"
Flight of the Conchords
"You know how you tend to prefer me out of me and Bret?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- No. - Yeah, when you see us,"
Flight of the Conchords
"you just flirt a little bit more with me."
Flight of the Conchords
"A tiny... sorry, Doug."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Happy anniversary, by the way. - Thanks."
Flight of the Conchords
"- You know, you'd prefer me? - Yes..."
Flight of the Conchords
"Give him some compliments."
Flight of the Conchords
"Say, like, "You look hot," or..."
Flight of the Conchords
"l-I don't really know, it's not my forte."
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay, I can do that. It'll be like our secret plan together."
Flight of the Conchords
"I'd compliment him myself but I think it might be gay."
Flight of the Conchords
"Oh no, that's not gay at all."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Isn't it? - Oh no."
Flight of the Conchords
"To tell a friend he looks good? No, that's not gay."
Flight of the Conchords
"Maybe I will."
Flight of the Conchords
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