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Clips from Batman - Batman Stands Pat (S01E01)

"The best headed man in Gotham City."
Batman
"And what is this?"
Batman
"Thought that old bowl attracted so much attention before."
Batman
"- And this man here-- - I really must be going."
Batman
"It's been pleasant talking to you."
Batman
"Perhaps we can go into your bloodline some other time."
Batman
"Your bloodline?"
Batman
"That sounds icky."
Batman
"Just some cook."
Batman
"Anyway, Mr. Bowinkle.."
Batman
"...I hoped you would extend me the courtesy of an interview."
Batman
"Where is the prize winning little head piece right now?"
Batman
"Right now, I figure it's upstairs on my desk."
Batman
"Waitin'."
Batman
"Not knowin' it's headed for fame and fortune."
Batman
"Thank you."
Batman
"[instrumental music]"
Batman
"[music continues]"
Batman
"(Turkey) 'Why me lady?'"
Batman
"'There must be lot more with fancy ol' bonnets'"
Batman
"'than an ol' bowler?'"
Batman
"Well, how 'Male Modes' selects it's weekly winners"
Batman
"is of course our secret."
Batman
"But I suspect your virile charm had something to do with it."
Batman
"Yeah?"
Batman
"Well, maybe that virile charm would like to buy you something."
Batman
"What would you like?"
Batman
"On the house."
Batman
"Who let you out of the jug? What're you doin' with my hat?"
Batman
"That's it, Lisa, get lost."
Batman
"Just repaying old debts, Mr. Bowinkle."
Batman
"It took unanimous vote of that jury to send me up the river."
Batman
"Yeah, well, I'm casting another ballot right now."
Batman
"Do you usually carry a homing bat transmitter"
Batman
"in your bowler, Mr. Bowinkle?"
Batman
"I don't know how that thing got in there."
Batman
"I think I do."
Batman
"And I think Batman will end up in my hat factory after all."
Batman
"What's Batman got to do with it?"
Batman
"So the Mad Hatter gets his 12th juror."
Batman
"Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful!"
Batman
"Imagine, shearing Batman like a rabbit."
Batman
"Or stretching him into any form I wish."
Batman
"Or shrinking him and sizing him."
Batman
"Why, I.."
Batman
"A fizz.."
Batman
"...yes a fizz, I'll dye him red."
Batman
"I'll buy myself a camel and go riding off into the desert."
Batman
"Wearing a tribal chieftain's flowing robes.."
Batman
"...and Batman on my head."
Batman
"He's flipped his lid."
Batman
"'What're you mumbling about?'"
Batman
"My idle flights of fancy? My little day dreams?"
Batman
"Do nothing more than that believe me"
Batman
"I'm a very practical man."
Batman
"I already have my 12 jurors' hats and my 12 jurors."
Batman
"All I need now... is Batman's cowl."
Batman
"And the caped crusader out of the way."
Batman
"And my job will be complete."
Batman
"Yeah, but when do we eat?"
Batman
"'When I'm paid my fabulous ransom.'"
Batman
"Imagine a vouz."
Batman
"Owning the Gothsonian institution's"
Batman
"priceless collection of Presidential head gear."
Batman
"Ooh!"
Batman
"I think it's high time"
Batman
"the rightful owners of those hats were wearing them."
Batman
"Yeah but the real jury's still out."
Batman
"Turkey's bowler can't be far from here."
Batman
"The hideout must be in this old warehouse."
Batman
"Call, Commissioner Gordon"
Batman
"tell him we found the Mad Hatter's lair."
Batman
"[instrumental music]"
Batman
"It's working, they found us."
Batman
"It's a long way up."
Batman
"(Batman) 'You're right.'"
Batman
"Stand clear."
Batman
"They're climbing up the wall."
Batman
"Places, everyone."
Batman
"Gosh, Batman, you'd think we were human flies."
Batman
"That's all in the game, Robin."
Batman
"That sure is one way of looking at it."
Batman
"I'm extremely sorry about all these citizens."
Batman
"We meet again, dynamic duo."
Batman
"But I fear for the last time."
Batman
"Your little game of hide and seek is over."
Batman
"- Very clever Mr. Tetch. - Oh, you were the clever one."
Batman
"I might not have been able to lure you here"
Batman
"without your homing bat transmitter"
Batman
"in Mr. Bowinkle's hat."
Batman
"Holy bowler!"
Batman
"And now, caped crusader"
Batman
"you will take off your cowl and hand it over."
Batman
"for all the world to see."
Batman
"After that I'll take you on a personally conducted tour"
Batman
"of my hat factory."
Batman
"I'll have to be dead before you get my cowl."
Batman
"Then, we'll start with the hat factory."
Batman
"Straight ahead please."
Batman
"Turn on the machine, Dicer."
Batman
"You may find that it's smarts a bit to be shown, Batman."
Batman
"Until you lose consciousness, of course."
Batman
"Sorry, I'm late Jervis, but I needed a pedicure."
Batman
"The girl from Antis."
Batman
"Up to her pretty neck in evil."
Batman
"You're just in time."
Batman
"I usually reserve for rabbits, musk rats and beavers."
Batman
"Jervis, how droll."
Batman
"'Do get on with it though.'"
Batman
"'Then perhaps you can take me out for a bite to eat.'"
Batman
"You heard the lady."
Batman
"Would you like to walk into the factory under your own power"
Batman
"or would you like a shot or two to help?"
Batman
"[instrumental music]"
Batman
"[music continues]"
Batman
"Put him on the conveyor belt."
Batman
"[music continues]"
Batman
"Batman! Help!"
Batman
"I suppose he's passed the acid test, Robin."
Batman
"That'll keep him out mischief for a while."
Batman
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