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Clips from Superstore (2015) - Secret Shopper (S01E01)

"Yeah, obstructed view is fine."
Superstore (2015)
"Fired everyone."
Superstore (2015)
"- Like money? - No."
Superstore (2015)
"I'd know."
Superstore (2015)
"Nah, that's never gonna work."
Superstore (2015)
"Yeah, it's a terrible idea."
Superstore (2015)
"being surpassed by your protégé."
Superstore (2015)
"and then stock Charcoal in Patio."
Superstore (2015)
"I got that answer right on the test."
Superstore (2015)
"So unless we want to spend the next few weeks being MapQuest,"
Superstore (2015)
"I'm not gonna live in fear of some corporate spy."
Superstore (2015)
"You don't still use MapQuest, do you?"
Superstore (2015)
"- Cockapoo... - How old?"
Superstore (2015)
"So I'll just leave you to your shopping."
Superstore (2015)
"Sure it is."
Superstore (2015)
"You know, they say my head looks amazing in hats."
Superstore (2015)
"Yeah, that was cute and funny."
Superstore (2015)
"I can help you with that."
Superstore (2015)
"Uh, I got this, man."
Superstore (2015)
"Yeah, that's why his nickname is "The Rapist.""
Superstore (2015)
"What the was that?"
Superstore (2015)
"I just hope for your sake,"
Superstore (2015)
"but I'm just kind of one of those guys"
Superstore (2015)
"Good luck."
Superstore (2015)
"I mean, I'm being cool."
Superstore (2015)
"Jonah?"
Superstore (2015)
"before you go to Glenn, all right?"
Superstore (2015)
"Yeah, so next time, do a better job of it."
Superstore (2015)
"But there really is a policy."
Superstore (2015)
"But I'm now trying to do a better job of saying it."
Superstore (2015)
"Bummer. Who died?"
Superstore (2015)
"Look who knows a lot about Cloud 9 store policies."
Superstore (2015)
"Enough, all right?"
Superstore (2015)
"What you doing in here?"
Superstore (2015)
"You notice how Jonah"
Superstore (2015)
"Do you know what else is in Illinois?"
Superstore (2015)
"Cloud 9 headquarters."
Superstore (2015)
"I mean, now it makes sense how he beat my score"
Superstore (2015)
"Um, I-I don't think so."
Superstore (2015)
"- Absolutely. - Really?"
Superstore (2015)
"Uh-huh. Uh-huh."
Superstore (2015)
"Excuse me, Dina? Have you seen Jonah?"
Superstore (2015)
"Yes, but sometimes you say you're going to do things,"
Superstore (2015)
"Dildos are on sale for 69 cents in aisle 69."
Superstore (2015)
"Oh..."
Superstore (2015)
"'Cause he can't."
Superstore (2015)
"Oh."
Superstore (2015)
"- It's a plush toy... - Yeah, I know who Nosey is."
Superstore (2015)
"No, no. No. No, thank you."
Superstore (2015)
"from that place he always calls "an unassuming gem.""
Superstore (2015)
"Why are you getting meatballs for Jonah?"
Superstore (2015)
"What?"
Superstore (2015)
"- Sorry, not this! - Turn it off!"
Superstore (2015)
"The printers are right underneath..."
Superstore (2015)
"- Cool? - No, not cool!"
Superstore (2015)
"Okay, all right."
Superstore (2015)
"Turn... I'm not touching anything!"
Superstore (2015)
"I flunked out of business school..."
Superstore (2015)
"And then I wanted a snack,"
Superstore (2015)
"You are preaching to the choir."
Superstore (2015)
"Um, Jonah? Jonah."
Superstore (2015)
"I wouldn't be surprised if he had CIA training."
Superstore (2015)
"Spent a little time at The Farm."
Superstore (2015)
"This is my favorite part."
Superstore (2015)
"I know a camera when I see a camera."
Superstore (2015)
"Man, the camera loves me."
Superstore (2015)
"Excuse me, could you tell me where I can find the..."
Superstore (2015)
"Ah. I'm on the phone."
Superstore (2015)
"I've been waiting for help for, like, 20 minutes."
Superstore (2015)
"I've been on hold for 40."
Superstore (2015)
"But when the Chili Peppers come to town,"
Superstore (2015)
"you do what it takes."
Superstore (2015)
"Is there a manager I could speak with?"
Superstore (2015)
"Whatever it takes to see the Peppers."
Superstore (2015)
"What you watching? Stuff?"
Superstore (2015)
"Corporate sent a secret shopper"
Superstore (2015)
"to the Richmond Heights store."
Superstore (2015)
"- It did not go well. - I think the screen froze."
Superstore (2015)
"Nah, he just stays like that for another 20 minutes."
Superstore (2015)
"Sir, excuse me."
Superstore (2015)
"I heard the Maplewood Commons got a secret shopper too."
Superstore (2015)
"Yeah, they cleaned house after."
Superstore (2015)
"Even the manager?"
Superstore (2015)
"Especially the manager."
Superstore (2015)
"How do you get especially fired?"
Superstore (2015)
"Kirkwood got a secret shopper, but they did well."
Superstore (2015)
"All the associates got raises."
Superstore (2015)
"Like they were lifted up into the air"
Superstore (2015)
"and waved around... yeah, money."
Superstore (2015)
"I wonder if they'll send one here."
Superstore (2015)
"A secret shopper?"
Superstore (2015)
"I can always sniff out a fake."
Superstore (2015)
"The only way a secret shopper's getting past me"
Superstore (2015)
"is if he doesn't even know he's a secret shopper."
Superstore (2015)
"Like Harrison Ford in "Blade Runner.""
Superstore (2015)
"I'm gonna say this one more time."
Superstore (2015)
"Deckard was not a replicant."
Superstore (2015)
"Then explain the friggin' unicorn!"
Superstore (2015)
"Director's Cut doesn't count!"
Superstore (2015)
"I can't listen to"
Superstore (2015)
"the "Blade Runner" debate one more time."
Superstore (2015)
"I would love for them to send a secret shopper."
Superstore (2015)
"But then again, I got a 93"
Superstore (2015)
"on my last corporate policy test,"
Superstore (2015)
"so nothing but net."
Superstore (2015)
"Mateo, those scores don't mean anything."
Superstore (2015)
"I don't know. 93 is pretty impressive."
Superstore (2015)
"I got 100."
Superstore (2015)
"Really?"
Superstore (2015)
"Well, that was a hurtfully exaggerated "really.""
Superstore (2015)
"No, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to sound bad."
Superstore (2015)
"I just meant, you're not very good at your job."
Superstore (2015)
"Oh, okay. Well, thank you."
Superstore (2015)
"Okay, guys, nothing else matters"
Superstore (2015)
"but this secret shopper, okay?"
Superstore (2015)
"We need a plan."
Superstore (2015)
"I know."
Superstore (2015)
"What if we treated every customer"
Superstore (2015)
"like they were the secret shopper?"
Superstore (2015)
"This has got to be the lamest thing"
Superstore (2015)
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