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Clips from The Detour - The Tank (S01E01)

"Lion."
The Detour
"A lion?"
The Detour
"You know, synergy, 'cause I'm..."
The Detour
"No. Unless... No."
The Detour
"Okay. Yeah."
The Detour
"Hey!"
The Detour
"- Yes! Yeah, come here. - What?!"
The Detour
"Just stop... stop yelling."
The Detour
"- Are you Nate Parker? - Yes. Come on."
The Detour
"So you said you got a story for me?"
The Detour
"and I need you to shine a light on that."
The Detour
"Just... you wanna write that up, e-mail it to me?"
The Detour
"There's no "print.""
The Detour
"Uh, no, we're... we're saving this spot."
The Detour
"You can't save spots."
The Detour
"Yes, we can. Okay? And there's plenty of other spots."
The Detour
"There's one right there. Don't look at me like that."
The Detour
"Look over there."
The Detour
"Thank you."
The Detour
"Listen, dude, this all seems like a lot of work, okay?"
The Detour
"I usually just reblog stuff from the ap."
The Detour
"It's, like, this thing that they have now that just, like,"
The Detour
"blasts out all the news from everywhere."
The Detour
"You're talking about the A.P.? The Associated Press?"
The Detour
"Yeah, it's like "Rooters." It's dope."
The Detour
"- Yes. - I'm such a dumb-ass."
The Detour
"Listen, I have risked everything to bring this to you."
The Detour
"And trust me, you were not my first choice."
The Detour
"Oh, why would I be?"
The Detour
"and reblog shit other people wrote,"
The Detour
"millions of lives in the process?"
The Detour
"He wasn't leaving that spot. He was adjusting his park job."
The Detour
"Okay. So what's the product?"
The Detour
"This is..."
The Detour
"It's..."
The Detour
"Whoa. I trust you. I trust you."
The Detour
"I could use a drink, too."
The Detour
"Oh, my god. You are the most overhydrated generation."
The Detour
"- Can I have some of your juice? - Nope. Mommy's juice."
The Detour
"- Doesn't that have alcohol? - Shh."
The Detour
"- Can I try some? - No. It's not for kids."
The Detour
"- Just give him a sip. - What?"
The Detour
"- He's not gonna like it. - All right."
The Detour
"- Oh, door's open. - Let's go. Too late. Lost your chance."
The Detour
"Davey?"
The Detour
"Davey?"
The Detour
"Davey!"
The Detour
"Oh, yeah."
The Detour
"Davey?"
The Detour
"Uh, I'm here to pick up the car you're sleeping in."
The Detour
"Davey? Dave?"
The Detour
"Dave? Davey? Davey?"
The Detour
"Davey? Davey! Davey!"
The Detour
"- Davey! Davey! Davey! Davey! Davey! - Nate. Nate. Nate. Nate!"
The Detour
"Please stop yelling! It's like a jackhammer in here."
The Detour
"Do you have a better idea how to wake him up?"
The Detour
"Oh, no, he's not drunk. He drank some poison water."
The Detour
"but yes, technically, it is poison."
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"Probably tastes awful!"
The Detour
"Yeah, and if you do, you end up like that guy."
The Detour
"- So why do you drink? - I don't."
The Detour
"I'm bringing myself back up to zero."
The Detour
"of different reasons."
The Detour
"Mm-hmm."
The Detour
"We go to school all day."
The Detour
"Do you drink while we're in school?"
The Detour
"for instance, after conversations like this,"
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"I just need to loosen up a bit."
The Detour
"don't do what I do or you're gonna end up like that guy."
The Detour
"Oh, my god."
The Detour
"Oh, my god. You're so dense."
The Detour
"Oh,my god."
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"I don't know what to do. Oh, my god!"
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"Kids, you gotta stay hydrated."
The Detour
"Great. So, uh, we're good to go?"
The Detour
"Oh, yeah. She's as good as new."
The Detour
"You sure about that?"
The Detour
"- Give it a Fonzie? - A what?"
The Detour
"A Fonzie. The... the Fonz. You just did it."
The Detour
"I never said, "Eyyy,""
The Detour
"but I did upgrade your side door."
The Detour
"So I had to glue one of those bad boys on your starter."
The Detour
"Yeah, everyone says that."
The Detour
"Yeah, everybody says that, too."
The Detour
"- It's not working. - You gotta hum into it."
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"under the influence."
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"Fail. Fail. Fail."
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"- Are you guys alcoholics? - No. That was a computer glitch."
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"- why she insisted we keep it? - Because the guy wasn't listening."
The Detour
"Why is it so hot in here? Is this not on?"
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"Aah! Oh!"
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"Aah! Aah!"
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"Ooh."
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"Why is that beeping now?"
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"Aah!"
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"Davey!"
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"Somebody look up how to cheat this thing."
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"Oh, oh, oh!"
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"That's so gross... it's so gross."
The Detour
"Oh, here's a way to beat a breathalyzer."
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"- What?! What is it?! - Don't drink."
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"You know, you could've helped, you know."
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"I'm... I'm more drunk than anyone else..."
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"I know that! That's the problem!"
The Detour
"Oh, shit."
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"- Wait, you're pretty sure? - Mostly sure."
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"Yeah, you're gonna get some alcohol first or..."
The Detour
"You would like that, you drunk."
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"Look, sir, do... do you know the mechanic, Davey, up the way?"
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"Davey? From Davey wheels and tires?"
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"That place burned down 20 years ago."
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"Davey was in there that night. Burned to death."
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"Now you made me miss the vein."
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"God! You put an air bubble in there, you'll kill me."
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"Is that right? That'd be even worse way to die."
The Detour
"Sir, we've complied with all your requests."
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"I'm afraid not. Kids?"
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"Okay. Your mommy and daddy have done a bad thing."
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"You can stay here. They're gonna have a little time-out."
The Detour
"Mm-hmm, that's right."
The Detour
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