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Clips from South Park - Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics (S03E03)

"Yes, we know, Mrs. Broflovski. It's so very interesting."
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"That's why they're lame"
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"- Oh, hi, Dad. - Hello, everybody. Say, can I join in?"
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"Sure."
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"And when it's dry and ready With dreidel I shall"
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"Dad?"
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"Dad, we're singing about a dreidel."
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"With dreidel I shall play"
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"'cause we're gonna descend down into Hell."
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"Well, I tell you what."
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"Maybe we'll have ourselves a little Christmas right here."
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"Come on, everyone, gather around!"
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"String up the lights and light up the tree"
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"Demons are nicer as you pass them by"
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"There's a lot of demon toys to buy The snow is falling and all is well"
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"It's Christmas time in Hell!"
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"There goes Jeffrey Dahmer With a festive Christmas ham"
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"After he has sex with it He'll eat up all he can"
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"And there goes John F. Kennedy Caroling with his son"
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"Everybody has a happy glow"
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"God cast me down from Heaven's door to rule in Hell for ever more"
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"But now I'm kinda glad that I fell 'Cause it's Christmas time in Hell!"
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"Over poor Gene Siskel's head Just watch his wienie grow"
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"For one day we all stop burning And the flames are not so thick"
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"But for just one day, all is well It's Christmas time in Hell!"
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"Wake his mother and ring the bells"
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"It's Christmas time"
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"Christmas time"
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"Fighting the Frizzies, at 11:00."
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"Hark, hear the bells, sweet silver bells All seem to say, ding dong, m'kay"
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"Telling their tale, gaily they ring While people sing songs of good cheer"
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"Christmas is here"
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"On, on they send On without end"
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"All seem to say, ding dong, m'kay"
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"Their joyful tone to every home"
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"But let's not forget that for some people,"
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"Christmas is about the birth of Jesus."
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"So now, here's a more serious Christmas song, sung by Eric Cartman."
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"It is the night of our dear Saviour's birth"
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"O holy night"
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"The something, something, something"
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"Jesus was born And so I get presents"
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"Voices!"
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"O night divine"
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"Okay, children, let's take our seats."
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"Now pay attention."
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"I heard there is no Christmas In the silly Middle East"
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"And so every December I go to the Middle East and say"
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"Hey, there, Mister Muslim Merry... Christmas"
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"So get off your heathen Muslim ass and... celebrate!"
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"There is no holiday season in India, I've heard"
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"And that is why in December I'll go to India and shout"
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"In case you haven't noticed It's Jesus' birthday"
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"They pray to several gods And put needles in their skin"
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"Hey there, Mister Shintoist Merry... Christmas!"
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"On Christmas day I travel round the world and say"
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"Thank you, Mr. Hat."
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"Frizzies, at 11:00."
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"And what was in those ships all three On Christmas day, on Christmas day"
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"And what..."
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"Shut up, turds!"
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"The Virgin Mary and Christ were there On Christmas day, on Christmas day"
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"Shut up, turds!"
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"... Christ were there On Christmas day in the morning"
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"Let us all rejoice, amen On Christmas day, on Christmas day"
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"And let..."
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"... us all rejoice, amen On Christmas day in the morning"
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"Shelly is starting to get pissed On Christmas day, on Christmas day"
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"I'd say my Christmas special is going super-fantastic."
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"But now it's time to hear from perhaps"
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"and welcome Saint Nicholas and Jesus Christ."
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"You know, Jesus, there have been so many wonderful songs"
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"written about us over the years."
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"Like this one."
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"Let earth receive me"
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"Let every heart prepare me room"
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"- And heaven and nature sing - And heaven and nature sing"
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"Up on the housetop, click click click"
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"- You get away! - Go away?"
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"Cute little eight-pound me asleep in the hay"
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"Here's one."
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"It's my turn."
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"That's not a Christmas song, bud. That's like..."
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"and only four... Santa ones!"
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"It's not fair! Just do it yourself! I'm leaving!"
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"- No... you, Jesus! - But, Santa..."
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"The weather outside is frightful"
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"But I brought some corn for poopity popping"
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"The fire is slowly dying"
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"Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!"
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"Her name is Rio and she dances on the sand"
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"Fighting Frizzies, at 11:00."
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"Have yourself a merry little Christmas"
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"Here we are as in olden days"
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"Happy golden days of yore"
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"Through the years we all will be together"
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"And have yourself"
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"A merry little Christmas now"
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"Bye, Mr. Hankey. See you next year."
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"Squeezing 'tween your festive buns"
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"Mr. Hankey, the Christmas poo He loves me"
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"Season's greetings to all of you Let's sing songs and dance and play"
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"Sometimes he's runny Sometimes he's firm"
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"Sometimes he's practically water"
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"Mr. Hankey, the Christmas poo"
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"- I'll try to make it spin - Jews play stupid games"
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"- Learn to make the dreidel spin - Jews play stupid games"
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"I have a little dreidel I made it out of clay"
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"I made you out of clay"
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"It's Christmas time in Hell!"
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"Oh, how they pound, raising the sound O'er hill and dale"
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"O night divine"
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"In case you haven't noticed It's Jesus' birthday"
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"And that is just absurd"
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"On December 25th All they do is eat a cake"
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"God is gonna kick your ass You infidelic pagan scum"
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"In case you haven't noticed There's festive things to do"
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"Merry... Christmas to you"
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"... was in those ships all three On Christmas day in the morning"
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"The stars in the sky looked down where I lay"
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