Loading...
You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from Seinfeld - The Maid (S09E09)

"George. What is that? It's nothing."
Seinfeld
"I was thinking..."
Seinfeld
"...T-Bone."
Seinfeld
"They heard I opened for Kenny Rogers once."
Seinfeld
"Why did you get a maid?"
Seinfeld
"Where did you get her?"
Seinfeld
"- ...or a newswoman. - Newswoman."
Seinfeld
"I don't know if I can handle one of these long-distance relationships."
Seinfeld
"It's like 10 minutes by subway."
Seinfeld
"I don't know."
Seinfeld
"And she's a 646."
Seinfeld
"They've run out of 212s so all the new phone numbers are 646."
Seinfeld
"Listen, heads up, Elaine."
Seinfeld
"I'm gonna have to stop by later and pick up a fax."
Seinfeld
"See, this is why you should get a fax and a Xerox."
Seinfeld
"There's a lot of stuff in my apartment I've never seen."
Seinfeld
"Turkey sandwich."
Seinfeld
"- For lunch? - Well, I am just a T-bone kind of guy."
Seinfeld
"Well, then we should call you T-Bone."
Seinfeld
"Message three."
Seinfeld
"I was going to say, being a good host."
Seinfeld
"...and we have our work relationship."
Seinfeld
"- Have you been out? - Yes, we have."
Seinfeld
"- To get what? - Stuff."
Seinfeld
"- Six-four-six? What is this? - That's your new area code."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, you know this comes on at the same time here..."
Seinfeld
"Really? It's Tuesday here. What day is it there?"
Seinfeld
"- No T-Bone? - Hey, is that T-Bone?"
Seinfeld
"- Why no T-Bone? - Why no T-Bone?"
Seinfeld
"I'm back. Hey, you wanna play cards over the phone?"
Seinfeld
"No, no, it's right here in the city."
Seinfeld
"It's the same as 212, they just multiplied it by three."
Seinfeld
"Excuse me, can I talk to you for a second there, Watkins?"
Seinfeld
"Koko. Koko. Koko..."
Seinfeld
"She passed."
Seinfeld
"Quick question..."
Seinfeld
"Listen, can I borrow your suitcases?"
Seinfeld
"They're behind my skis and my tennis racket."
Seinfeld
"- Koko? - Koko."
Seinfeld
"I don't know what this is."
Seinfeld
"Just look straight forward."
Seinfeld
"- Come on, what did he say? - Never mind."
Seinfeld
"- Where'd you go? - Go back."
Seinfeld
"I hate the counter."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, who's that?"
Seinfeld
"I got a 212 number..."
Seinfeld
"So how's it going at work? Did they get tired of it?"
Seinfeld
"The distance, the longing, the distance, the-"
Seinfeld
"No. Jerry. I won't be like you."
Seinfeld
"- All right, I'm taking off. - Okay."
Seinfeld
"You know, I don't think I wanna be your girlfriend or maid."
Seinfeld
"Nobody knows what happened."
Seinfeld
"What a nightmare it must be to have a real family."
Seinfeld
"- What's around you? - I'm looking at Ray's Pizza."
Seinfeld
"Well, what street are you on?"
Seinfeld
"Just wait there. I'll pick you up. And Kramer..."
Seinfeld
"- I sent one of my girls to your place. - Cindy."
Seinfeld
"She says she had a little problem with you, you didn't pay."
Seinfeld
"Disinfectant on the blinds, vacuuming the couch."
Seinfeld
"And sometimes when Gammy's not alone."
Seinfeld
"Hey."
Seinfeld
"- What do you want? - Here. I got your money."
Seinfeld
"Come on, take it. It's money."
Seinfeld
"- You got any money? - No."
Seinfeld
"You wanna make some?"
Seinfeld
"When I was a little girl in Jamaica..."
Seinfeld
"- Who's Gammy? - There's no Gammy."
Seinfeld
"Gammy. Gammy. Gammy. Gammy. Gammy. Gammy."
Seinfeld
"Last time I open for a rodeo."
Seinfeld
"I've gone as far as I can go with George Costanza."
Seinfeld
"Is this the suicide talk, or the nickname talk?"
Seinfeld
"The nickname."
Seinfeld
"It's got no snap. No zip."
Seinfeld
"I need a nickname that makes people light up."
Seinfeld
"You mean like Liza."
Seinfeld
"But there's no T in your name. What about G-Bone?"
Seinfeld
"- There's no G-Bone. - There's a G-Spot."
Seinfeld
"That's a myth."
Seinfeld
"T-Bone, the ladies are gonna love you."
Seinfeld
"Why did they hire you for a rodeo?"
Seinfeld
"Didn't he throw you off a bus in the middle of Alabama?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, I had that coming to me."
Seinfeld
"You know, Kenny Rogers has-"
Seinfeld
"You don't have to whisper. She knows she's a maid."
Seinfeld
"I hired her from a service."
Seinfeld
"- All done. - Thank you. Nice job."
Seinfeld
"- Is this mine? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- What? - Come on, Jerry, you didn't notice?"
Seinfeld
"Notice what? She's not really even a maid."
Seinfeld
"She wants to be an actress..."
Seinfeld
"...or a model or a dancer..."
Seinfeld
"Well, bad news, boys."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, my life is over. My girlfriend's moving away."
Seinfeld
"- You have a girlfriend? - Jerry, where have you been?"
Seinfeld
"At a rodeo."
Seinfeld
"- Where's she moving? - Downtown."
Seinfeld
"- Downtown New York? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"Well, you got a maid."
Seinfeld
"Come on, it's a whole different world downtown."
Seinfeld
"Different Gap, different Tower Records."
Seinfeld
"- What? What's that? - That's the new area code."
Seinfeld
"I was a 718 when I first moved here. I cried every night."
Seinfeld
"- At work? - No, at your apartment."
Seinfeld
"I don't have a fax machine."
Seinfeld
"Here we go."
Seinfeld
"Well, now what are we gonna do?"
Seinfeld
"And a deadbolt."
Seinfeld
"You sure you don't have one?"
Seinfeld
"Then maybe you have a fax machine."
Seinfeld
"You just blew my mind."
Seinfeld
"Let's order lunch."
Seinfeld
"Mary, I will have a chef's salad."
Seinfeld
"T-bone steak."
Seinfeld
"Love that T-bone."
Seinfeld
"- In fact, you might as well call me- - That sounds good."
Seinfeld
"I'll have one too."
Seinfeld
"- Watkins, you're having a T-bone? - I love them."
Seinfeld
"- No, no, no, we shouldn't. - T-Bone."
Seinfeld
"Hello?"
Seinfeld
"What?"
Seinfeld
Show more clips