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Clips from ALF - Border Song (S01E01)

Manure.

"Manure."

ALF

Isn't it too late for that?

"Isn't it too late for that?"

ALF

Nurturing new life from the soil.

"Nurturing new life from the soil."

ALF

Un hombre... nombre fredo mancia.

"Un hombre... nombre fredo mancia."

ALF

Never mind, i'm with the social services department...

"Never mind, i'm with the social services department..."

ALF

I'm trying to find a man named fredo mancia.

"I'm trying to find a man named fredo mancia."

ALF

Why can't i go home? Everybody else is.

"Why can't i go home? Everybody else is."

ALF

I want to be sure there's somebody there to meet him.

"I want to be sure there's somebody there to meet him."

ALF

Who knows anything about fredo mancia?

"Who knows anything about fredo mancia?"

ALF

Well, somebody must-- I'm-- I'm sorry, too.

"Well, somebody must-- I'm-- I'm sorry, too."

ALF

We should have used more manure.

"We should have used more manure."

ALF

You know, it's really weird.

"You know, it's really weird."

ALF

None of the other plants will grow,

"None of the other plants will grow,"

ALF

It's weirder than you think;

"It's weirder than you think;"

ALF

Gardening is tougher than it looks.

"Gardening is tougher than it looks."

ALF

It'd be a heck of a lot easier...

"It'd be a heck of a lot easier..."

ALF

Yeah. He comes into my garden at night and digs up the plants.

"Yeah. He comes into my garden at night and digs up the plants."

ALF

[ Ring ] i'll get it.

"[ Ring ] i'll get it."

ALF

Who was that?

"Who was that?"

ALF

What am i, the desk clerk?

"What am i, the desk clerk?"

ALF

Don't hang up. I have to talk to kate.

"Don't hang up. I have to talk to kate."

ALF

I'm taking a mexican boy to catch his bus.

"I'm taking a mexican boy to catch his bus."

ALF

Kate, you gotta hear this. Pick up.

"Kate, you gotta hear this. Pick up."

ALF

Honey, what's the problem?

"Honey, what's the problem?"

ALF

So i'm going to take him down and put him on the bus myself.

"So i'm going to take him down and put him on the bus myself."

ALF

Well, i understand, honey.

"Well, i understand, honey."

ALF

Why am i talking to you?

"Why am i talking to you?"

ALF

I don't know. You called.

"I don't know. You called."

ALF

Kate, be home a little later, okay? Bye-Bye.

"Kate, be home a little later, okay? Bye-Bye."

ALF

Whoa! Don't give him those!

"Whoa! Don't give him those!"

ALF

I can't. I've got money on this game.

"I can't. I've got money on this game."

ALF

Have we met?

"Have we met?"

ALF

I look like the village idiot.

"I look like the village idiot."

ALF

Luis is going to stay here tonight.

"Luis is going to stay here tonight."

ALF

And i'll sleep in the laundry room with--

"And i'll sleep in the laundry room with--"

ALF

I think the couch will be fine.

"I think the couch will be fine."

ALF

[ Alf ] whoopie!

"[ Alf ] whoopie!"

ALF

C'mon, luis.

"C'mon, luis."

ALF

Well,

"Well,"

ALF

Just for 24 hours, just until i can find his dad.

"Just for 24 hours, just until i can find his dad."

ALF

Honey, what happened?

"Honey, what happened?"

ALF

And instead of turning right, i turned left onto third--

"And instead of turning right, i turned left onto third--"

ALF

And then i sort of came home.

"And then i sort of came home."

ALF

¡Dios mio!

"¡Dios mio!"

ALF

What are you doing here?

"What are you doing here?"

ALF

¿Ves? Amigos.

"¿Ves? Amigos."

ALF

¿Qu?Estabas haciendo con esto?

"¿Qu?Estabas haciendo con esto?"

ALF

Perd?.

"Perd?."

ALF

I didn't even know he knew spanish.

"I didn't even know he knew spanish."

ALF

Tanner! Just heard a funny story.

"Tanner! Just heard a funny story."

ALF

For now i'll assume this is a clerical error.

"For now i'll assume this is a clerical error."

ALF

If anybody'll know about this mancia guy, he will.

"If anybody'll know about this mancia guy, he will."

ALF

My name is willie tanner.

"My name is willie tanner."

ALF

I've been thinking--

"I've been thinking--"

ALF

Weeds. Mala hierba.

"Weeds. Mala hierba."

ALF

How much longer do we have to eat zucchini?

"How much longer do we have to eat zucchini?"

ALF

Hi, honey. Hi.

"Hi, honey. Hi."

ALF

I know. Lynn, go get luis, will you?

"I know. Lynn, go get luis, will you?"

ALF

Dad, what happened?

"Dad, what happened?"

ALF

Where did you find him, dad?

"Where did you find him, dad?"

ALF

What?

"What?"

ALF

¡No, no! ¡No comprendo! ¡No comprendo!

"¡No, no! ¡No comprendo! ¡No comprendo!"

ALF

You're the one who found his father.

"You're the one who found his father."

ALF

Luis and i have become very close.

"Luis and i have become very close."

ALF

- We've mulched, - I know.

"- We've mulched, - I know."

ALF

Confab.

"Confab."

ALF

All right!

"All right!"

ALF

No problem.

"No problem."

ALF

Go! Yeah!

"Go! Yeah!"

ALF

That's exactly why the martians are extinct.

"That's exactly why the martians are extinct."

ALF

"Space invaders."

""Space invaders.""

ALF

Because i found my good hoe in this condition.

"Because i found my good hoe in this condition."

ALF

[ Kate ] willie!!!

"[ Kate ] willie!!!"

ALF

Hey, i think i know that guy!

"Hey, i think i know that guy!"

ALF

What?

"What?"

ALF

Add manure to your grocery list.

"Add manure to your grocery list."

ALF

Why?

"Why?"

ALF

So you won't forget it.

"So you won't forget it."

ALF

I mean, why do you want manure?

"I mean, why do you want manure?"

ALF

To spread on my carrots.

"To spread on my carrots."

ALF

No, it's for my garden.

"No, it's for my garden."

ALF

I forgot to prime the soil with manure before i planted.

"I forgot to prime the soil with manure before i planted."

ALF

It's never too late for manure.

"It's never too late for manure."

ALF

That would make a nice bumper sticker.

"That would make a nice bumper sticker."

ALF

If this works out, i may expand.

"If this works out, i may expand."

ALF

Maybe plant some cotton,

"Maybe plant some cotton,"

ALF

Or, in the winter, wool.

"Or, in the winter, wool."

ALF

Expand? You've already torn up the whole backyard.

"Expand? You've already torn up the whole backyard."

ALF

I mean, i'm really into this gardening thing.

"I mean, i'm really into this gardening thing."

ALF

I love spending time in the sun, feeling the earth,

"I love spending time in the sun, feeling the earth,"

ALF

Well, i'm glad you enjoy it.

"Well, i'm glad you enjoy it."

ALF

I also like eating the bugs.

"I also like eating the bugs."

ALF

[ Willie ] hola, yo deber-- Oh, wait a minute-- Yo deber localizar...

"[ Willie ] hola, yo deber-- Oh, wait a minute-- Yo deber localizar..."

ALF

What? You speak english?

"What? You speak english?"

ALF

Of los angeles county.

"Of los angeles county."

ALF

He's a farmer, he lives near san felipe.

"He's a farmer, he lives near san felipe."

ALF

Lynn--

"Lynn--"

ALF

Can i go home now? No.

"Can i go home now? No."

ALF

Lynn is 17, brian is siete.

"Lynn is 17, brian is siete."

ALF

Good night. Good night, scott.

"Good night. Good night, scott."

ALF

He's alone, he's frightened,

"He's alone, he's frightened,"

ALF

And if i'm going to put him alone on a bus back to mexico,

"And if i'm going to put him alone on a bus back to mexico,"

ALF

You don't care what traffic's like this time of night.

"You don't care what traffic's like this time of night."

ALF

Yes, i'm still here. Have you found anyone...

"Yes, i'm still here. Have you found anyone..."

ALF

He's gone? Gone where?

"He's gone? Gone where?"

ALF

It's a deal.

"It's a deal."

ALF

Good news, kate. I just saved us 5 bucks.

"Good news, kate. I just saved us 5 bucks."

ALF

How?

"How?"

ALF

I ordered the manure by the truck load.

"I ordered the manure by the truck load."

ALF

Here, alf. I have to go back for the onions.

"Here, alf. I have to go back for the onions."

ALF

There aren't many, but they're fine yams.

"There aren't many, but they're fine yams."

ALF

Mom, that's eggplant.

"Mom, that's eggplant."

ALF

But we have zucchini to fill a warehouse.

"But we have zucchini to fill a warehouse."

ALF

I'm sure things will get better, alf.

"I'm sure things will get better, alf."

ALF

If it weren't for bob barker.

"If it weren't for bob barker."

ALF

Bob barker?

"Bob barker?"

ALF

The game show host?

"The game show host?"

ALF

Mom, "bob barker" is the ochmonek's dog.

"Mom, "bob barker" is the ochmonek's dog."

ALF

Oh, the chihuahua.

"Oh, the chihuahua."

ALF

Alf, put that claw down.

"Alf, put that claw down."

ALF

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