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Clips from Scrubs - My Therapeutic Month (S06E06)

"Been there, bro. Been there."
Scrubs
"I did not."
Scrubs
"- And this isn't soy. - Sucks to be you."
Scrubs
"That's how she got her rad shoe collection in college."
Scrubs
"Honey, they got that almond biscotti J.D. Loves."
Scrubs
"No, you got him a present yesterday."
Scrubs
"Hey, thanks for the biscotti, Obi-Brown."
Scrubs
"No problem, Luke."
Scrubs
"And thanks for answering my page. I really want to rent this place,"
Scrubs
"but once I told the landlord about my DUI"
Scrubs
"- What's with that? - I have no idea."
Scrubs
"- What happened, are you okay? - It was a totally unavoidable accident."
Scrubs
"(WHOOPING)"
Scrubs
"We're a little busy in here, Laverne."
Scrubs
"Hi, I'm Anne Chase, Brian's physical therapist."
Scrubs
"Oh."
Scrubs
"Nice try, Turkleton, but the medical staff is shorthanded,"
Scrubs
"what with Gloria on bed rest."
Scrubs
"Gloria's having twins! My lady's having my babies!"
Scrubs
"Hey, hey, hey! What is up with the giant novelty pen?"
Scrubs
"Son of a bitch, that's hot."
Scrubs
"with such delicate, soft ears."
Scrubs
"but I'm not ready to get back in the game yet."
Scrubs
"- I have a fiberglass skull. - It's always a competition with you."
Scrubs
"(MOANING)"
Scrubs
"I always think about you when I'm in the box, you know that."
Scrubs
"Oh, the coaster argument."
Scrubs
"(TURK MOANING)"
Scrubs
"(GASPING)"
Scrubs
"Name a test, any test, that you would run for lupus."
Scrubs
"It really is just super that you're here with us"
Scrubs
"Hell, after surgery, if there's the slightest medical issue,"
Scrubs
"It is also the number one reason that all of you should pray to God,"
Scrubs
"that you never have to be treated by these flesh-hungry butchers."
Scrubs
"He's got this strange power."
Scrubs
"You wait, eventually you'll crave his approval and become just like me."
Scrubs
"- Oh, God! - Thank you."
Scrubs
"was mutton chop enthusiast Ambrose Burnsides."
Scrubs
"Read 'em and weep."
Scrubs
"- What are you doing in here? - Hiding from Anne, man."
Scrubs
"Everything was fine until Elliot broke out her unending list of insane rules,"
Scrubs
"Yeah, I don't see what's insane about not wanting spiders"
Scrubs
"to lay eggs in my Corn Flakes. That's how Carla's mom died."
Scrubs
"You know what, Keith? Carla's right. I mean, if we're gonna try..."
Scrubs
"J.D.: As I went to ask Anne out"
Scrubs
"and felt the familiar light-headedness I get right before a poo-faint..."
Scrubs
"Hello. Okay."
Scrubs
"Make a deal there, Gandhi. I will stop mocking you"
Scrubs
"And sometimes a deal can ruin everything."
Scrubs
"Here's the deal, Keith. My house, my rules."
Scrubs
"ask her a random question I knew she'd say yes to."
Scrubs
"J.D.: (SHOUTING) I felt bad about my lie to Brian! Still, I..."
Scrubs
"I felt bad about my lie to Brian. Still, I knew I had to keep it going."
Scrubs
"Check out the back scratches."
Scrubs
"Hey, but don't tell her that you know about us, okay?"
Scrubs
"Oh, yeah, sure."
Scrubs
"Presenting, the world's longest shush."
Scrubs
"(INHALING HEAVILY)"
Scrubs
"I'm gonna go ahead and stop."
Scrubs
"I'm gonna go away, regroup, maybe see you later."
Scrubs
"Okay, a major indicator of hypokalemia is?"
Scrubs
"- I think for myself. - I think for myself."
Scrubs
"I won't say this."
Scrubs
"(ALL BOOING)"
Scrubs
"Give me a break. I haven't partied since the baby was born."
Scrubs
"I told Brian I was taking Anne to the Poconos, now he wants pictures."
Scrubs
"You have to help me morph the photos"
Scrubs
"I secretly took of her on my camera phone"
Scrubs
"That way you don't have to lie to Brian."
Scrubs
"So, this patient has fever of 103, renal failure and platelets of 25,000."
Scrubs
"Put them down!"
Scrubs
"It's obvious the patient is septic. I'd treat him with an activated protein C."
Scrubs
"CARLA: I told you this would happen."
Scrubs
"people can't take advice from someone that's already been through it?"
Scrubs
"You are."
Scrubs
"- Our love is special. - It isn't."
Scrubs
"Excuse me, Anne? Hey."
Scrubs
"Don't worry, she miscarried, okay."
Scrubs
"And I haven't even begun to think about asking anyone else out,"
Scrubs
"mostly because I'm concerned that the stress that lovemaking"
Scrubs
"much like I do when I defecate. I also live in a tent and just got a DUI."
Scrubs
"Will you please let me take you to dinner"
Scrubs
"Well, just no? Do you wanna elaborate on the "no"?"
Scrubs
"And when I finally did ask Anne out, she said no."
Scrubs
"Any last-minute shots you want to take at me?"
Scrubs
"as we real doctors do, but you're miles ahead"
Scrubs
"A lot of couples never make it that far."
Scrubs
"Ladies and gentlemen,"
Scrubs
"- Here you go. - All right."
Scrubs
"- Not bad, huh? - That's great."
Scrubs
"Let the medical wienies deal with it. Wienie-roast five!"
Scrubs
"Dude, don't be such a surgeon. Let's go check her out."
Scrubs
"Well, sort of."
Scrubs
"If there's any trace of alcohol at all on my breath, it won't start for 24 hours."
Scrubs
"Well, better start my shift."
Scrubs
"J.D.: My license had been suspended for a month"
Scrubs
"So old Sasha had become a perch for a local bird gang."
Scrubs
"(CAR HONKING)"
Scrubs
"Luckily, I found another way to get around."
Scrubs
"What's up?"
Scrubs
"Thanks for the ride, Lloyd. This DUI is such a hassle."
Scrubs
"- Alcohol? - Crack."
Scrubs
"Hey, by any chance, do you like speed metal?"
Scrubs
"- I know... - Here, sweetie."
Scrubs
"Oh, babe, I didn't want whipped cream."
Scrubs
"Oh, well, let me fix it for you, babe."
Scrubs
"I'll go get your coffee."
Scrubs
"Do you know how lucky you are to have a husband?"
Scrubs
"I mean, I've got a brand new home, I am totally ready to start my life,"
Scrubs
"My mom thinks I should test his love by saying I'm knocked up."
Scrubs
"If he doesn't propose on the spot,"
Scrubs
"I just demand that he gives me $600 for the abortion,"
Scrubs
"dump him, and ease my sadness with a brand-new pair of Jimmy Choos."
Scrubs
"Elliot, you can't test love. When I met Turk,"
Scrubs
"- The point is, you can't force it, okay? - Yeah."
Scrubs
"Here you go, babe."
Scrubs
"- I think we should move in together. - Awesome!"
Scrubs
"- Oh, babe! - Turk, where's my coffee?"
Scrubs
"Turk?"
Scrubs
"(GIGGLING)"
Scrubs
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