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Clips from Da Ali G Show - Neil Hamilton (S01E01)

"- Just be... - But not with words, don't..."
Da Ali G Show
"(Softly) Say no. Be careful. Just be careful."
Da Ali G Show
"(Softly) Be careful. Be careful."
Da Ali G Show
"- Don't do it. Be careful. - Cool."
Da Ali G Show
"Do you need any more models?"
Da Ali G Show
"We don't need any male models, we have about 40."
Da Ali G Show
"II demande si... Il veut savoir s'il peut faire le mannequin."
Da Ali G Show
"Il faut aller demander ‡ Lloyd."
Da Ali G Show
"Ask him to Lloyd Klein, over there."
Da Ali G Show
"I just wanted to say, if you want,"
Da Ali G Show
"- And you're...? - I'm his muse."
Da Ali G Show
"- Oh, great. - I'm here if you want."
Da Ali G Show
"Yeah, but if you want, I don't mind."
Da Ali G Show
"- You want? - For the moment it's OK."
Da Ali G Show
"I'm doing the bit with the underpants."
Da Ali G Show
"- Yeah, for the end. Great. - Sure."
Da Ali G Show
"- Er, I need to wear them. - OK."
Da Ali G Show
"# Creep on in, on in"
Da Ali G Show
"# See I'm riding high, riding high"
Da Ali G Show
"# That be blowin' up the land like where the bomb at?"
Da Ali G Show
"Well, I think most conduct"
Da Ali G Show
"that all of us engage in on a day-to-day basis is legal."
Da Ali G Show
"What is illegal is..."
Da Ali G Show
"what the elected representatives of the people"
Da Ali G Show
"That gets into technicalities and that's why you have trials."
Da Ali G Show
"Cos me saw this film called Barely Legal 3"
Da Ali G Show
"they had to have a three-header with their supervisor, this teacher."
Da Ali G Show
"- Is that to do with the law? - Er... It's hard to say."
Da Ali G Show
"- The college. - Yo, in this institution"
Da Ali G Show
"- you would get boned. - Right."
Da Ali G Show
"- Has you seen that film? - Yes. No, I haven't."
Da Ali G Show
"- You should check it out. - I will now,"
Da Ali G Show
"- as you've recommended it. - Yo, it's well good..."
Da Ali G Show
"I was Attorney General. My name is Meese."
Da Ali G Show
"(Police radio, sirens)"
Da Ali G Show
"who still had a policeman, a fireman and someone from the Navy to protect him."
Da Ali G Show
"And any time you hear 2310 on the radio,"
Da Ali G Show
"- (Ali) Yo! Gonna put on the siren. - (Siren)"
Da Ali G Show
"- Possibly. - (Radio) '2310 car.'"
Da Ali G Show
"Don't move. You is fucking with the wrong cop."
Da Ali G Show
"You can't curse."
Da Ali G Show
"You came here saying, "I wanna be a cop.""
Da Ali G Show
"I like, er, play table tennis."
Da Ali G Show
"a woman won't go out with you - she thinks that's all you want."
Da Ali G Show
"It doesn't matter."
Da Ali G Show
"To her... her vagine."
Da Ali G Show
"- Yes, I know. - Yeah."
Da Ali G Show
"How do I find if she will be a cheat?"
Da Ali G Show
"It was Neil Armstrong and no,"
Da Ali G Show
"But how do they really know what is exists"
Da Ali G Show
"I haven't seen those pictures."
Da Ali G Show
"No, the hotel is full."
Da Ali G Show
"- No doubt. - You took the moon,"
Da Ali G Show
"I've years of experience in the fashion business."
Da Ali G Show
"- I won't charge you anything. - Great."
Da Ali G Show
"(# Luniz: I Got 5 On lt)"
Da Ali G Show
"# So all I got is five # I got five!"
Da Ali G Show
"# Suck up the dank like a slurpy... #"
Da Ali G Show
"What is legal?"
Da Ali G Show
"So what is illegal?"
Da Ali G Show
"and it was about these two naughty college girls"
Da Ali G Show
"Three, OK. Good."
Da Ali G Show
"And the opposite of the moon being full is..."
Da Ali G Show
"- What? - That's when it's dark."
Da Ali G Show
"- Tell him to stop. - Yo, stop it!"
Da Ali G Show
"and them hadn't done their 'omework"
Da Ali G Show
""Ich don't think so". I mean, you know, let's face it."
Da Ali G Show
"What is barely legal?"
Da Ali G Show
"- For real, I has done a couple. - OK."
Da Ali G Show
"got all the credit for inventing the moonwalk"
Da Ali G Show
"- Why you laugh? - I think that's sweet."
Da Ali G Show
"- Barely Legal? - Barely Legal 3."
Da Ali G Show
"- I don't like touching blokes. - Let's go."
Da Ali G Show
"- You wanna wear them? - Yeah, for the finale."
Da Ali G Show
"# Hear dis, boy #"
Da Ali G Show
"America's most wanted. Have you seen this man?"
Da Ali G Show
"with the shoes..."
Da Ali G Show
"- It exists... - What?"
Da Ali G Show
"Where is we going to now?"
Da Ali G Show
"Yes, I want her to be blonde,"
Da Ali G Show
"# Give me two bucks, you take a puff and pass my bomb back"
Da Ali G Show
"Yekshemesh."
Da Ali G Show
"Thank you for coming in today"
Da Ali G Show
"like a man's anus."
Da Ali G Show
"- If you want to go to bed with her? - Yes."
Da Ali G Show
"Do you think man will ever walk on the sun?"
Da Ali G Show
"(# Hip-hop, scratching)"
Da Ali G Show
""Does the moon really exist?""
Da Ali G Show
"(# Fast techno)"
Da Ali G Show
"- Was she "Ich don't think so"? - Absolutely, for 20 years."
Da Ali G Show
"I am Chrysler's... You know the designer? I am his muse."
Da Ali G Show
"(# Slow R&B groove)"
Da Ali G Show
"And there is still racialism, even to the native people, what is they called, the..."
Da Ali G Show
"What's going to happen today is you're going to participate"
Da Ali G Show
"- So he claim. - Phone number real quick."
Da Ali G Show
"- Three men... - Yo, three men."
Da Ali G Show
"Keep your distance."
Da Ali G Show
"- You're open to all races? - Er, yes, but no Jew."
Da Ali G Show
"- to her? - What do you mean by "entry"?"
Da Ali G Show
"Nobody wants to be reminded of somebody who's dead."
Da Ali G Show
"Yes, I do not care about her. She is gone."
Da Ali G Show
"I don't like men that cheat on me."
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"If you're kissing and petting, then it just sort of goes... naturally."
Da Ali G Show
"No, when do me and you have a sexy intercourse?"
Da Ali G Show
"And maybe one year ago it was "Ich don't think so","
Da Ali G Show
"You can do... But no words."
Da Ali G Show
"- Is empty. ...the new moon."
Da Ali G Show