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Clips from 30 Rock - The Beginning of the End (S07E07)

"- Why not? - Watch the pilot, Lemon."
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"It's all explained in the end"
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"by the wise black man played by Karl Malone."
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"You're really taking some swings here."
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"I have no choice."
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"Word is he bought a boat."
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"I believe that is called a skiff."
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"I will not have you telling me boat names in my own office!"
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"Hank has vowed to keep KableTown in his family."
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"I have one chance to change his mind before he retires."
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"That's where shows like God Cop, O.J. Simpson Live,"
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"and Rule of Threes come in."
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"Oh, brother."
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"A comedy about two jive-talking con men hiding out in a monastery."
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"Jonathan, bring me my green light."
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"The doves I ordered for the wedding came,"
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"getting hit in the face with a foul ball."
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"I'm gonna be a nightmare."
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"Wait, if that was a drill, did you kill those doves?"
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"No, I bought them at the dead-dove store."
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"Grow up, Liz."
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"I prefer soul-sucking monster."
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"How could your wedding make you any worse?"
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"I don't know,"
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"but it's a fun little journey we're all gonna go on together."
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"Uh-huh. So, when is this wedding?"
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"I can't tell you."
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"It's a secret surprise wedding,"
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"because that's what all the big celebrities do."
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"Okay, that's not relevant."
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"You know, I have a lot of really good friends"
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"I could ask to be my maid of honor --"
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"Paz de la Huerta, the former Mrs. Jon Cryer,"
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"- Honey Boo Bods mom. - June."
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"But you're my oldest friend."
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"Liz, will you be my maid of honor?"
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"Oh, Jenna, that is so nice,"
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"but I've just got so much going on with the show and baby stuff."
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"Oh, God, my hands! Please!"
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"I'll do it! I'd love to do it! You're my best friend!"
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"Oh, you're in charge of the bachelorette party."
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"Make sure you have a stripper there from every race."
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"Stan looking for Indian now. It's a tough booking."
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"Mr. Jordan."
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"I need some advice."
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"I recommend you get it from Liz Lemon or an owl who wears glasses."
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"I've been living with Hazel for the past few months,"
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"and while we have gotten to second base --"
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"You mean a threesome with Robinson Cano?"
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"No! I mean sharing a yogurt"
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"And those are expensive."
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"It's just, Hazel's my first real girlfriend,"
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"and I want to make sure I'm doing everything I can to make her happy."
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"She comes home one night,"
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"you're in the kitchen naked, cooking chili."
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"You feed it to her out of your hands. Make her act like a bird."
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"That's half as long as it felt like Arliss was on TV."
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"'Cause guess what. She's always right."
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"The women in our lives are queens."
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"If she wants to look at new window treatments,"
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"you go to Crate Barn."
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"If she wants to have a dinner party, you go fry up some dolphin."
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"She does say we never entertain."
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"You're losing her. Go get her!"
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"Go get your woman!"
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"Speaking of which, Angie's been in the hospital for a week."
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"Could you go find out why?"
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"- Mm. - Thank you."
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"Frank, you do stand-up."
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"and they're allowed to sleep in the same bed."
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"Have it on my desk tomorrow."
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"Okay.-"
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"I wish. Then I could just solve it with the Schwartzfeld Tesseract."
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"Every day I wish some other company had bought NBC."
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"Xerox, Alcoa, PAAS."
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"- The Easter egg company? - They own their market."
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"When was the last time you bought a non-PAAS egg-dyeing kit?"
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"Try never. PAAS is the best."
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"Their wire egg-dipper is tops in the industry"
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"with the thinnest egg-loop to reduce dye lines."
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"Only I don't work for PAAS. I work for KableTown."
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"Your plan isn't gonna work. Your shows are terrible."
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"I mean, have you seen that new game show Homonym?"
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"Oh, boy."
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"Like when two people run into each other."
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"Sorry, it's the other one."
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"Your next word is stare."
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"Okay, the things you climb to get --"
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"- No, it's the other one. - it's always the other one!"
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"Let me see the card."
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"No! Never!"
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"So, you don't peacock them."
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"The clock's ticking, and you feel like time's running out."
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"But you can't let that panic get into your head."
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"Well, thank you for your feedback, Lemon, but I'm not panicking."
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"So, good peacock to you."
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"Mr. Jordan, I mentioned your dinner party idea to Hazel."
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"Yes, and I thought we'd have a little féte chez nous ce soir."
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"of the Nazis' most enthusiastic collaborators."
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"What a kind invitation."
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"I do enjoy seeing the homes of poor whites."
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"- What should I bring? - Just bring your fascinating self."
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"Kenneth tells me that you started your own movie studio this summer."
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"And I'm an aspiring actress"
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"whose most recent credits include running onstage during Sister Act."
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"This is wonderful!"
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"Tracy Jordan is coming to dinner."
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"Just like in that episode of Family Matters"
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"when Tracy Jordan came to dinner."
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"You know, I wasn't scripted to be in that episode."
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"I just wandered onto set because Reginald Vel Johnson owed me $40."
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"If you're thinking about Vegas for the bachelorette party,"
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"Tracy, I need your advice. You like to throw parties."
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"I'm Tracy Jordan."
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"Oh, my God."
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"I'm the most stable adult here."
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"Oh, God, I don't want to be Jenna's maid of honor."
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"She wants her something borrowed to be Jessica Biel's youth."
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"If you don't want to do this, you should tank it."
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"That's what I do when I want to get out of something,"
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