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Clips from The Golden Girls - Vacation (S02E02)

"Ma, you sure you'll be all right while we're away?"
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"- Dorothy, I'll be fine. - Listen. Behave yourself."
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"- And Pepto-Bismol? - Yes, Rose."
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"You're making me crazy."
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"Come on, now."
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"Oh. Oh, yes."
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"Run behind it."
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"This isn't good enough for you?"
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"Would you go downstairs and tell the scumsucker we want to see him?"
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"Now I'll probably end up a prisoner of the revolution."
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"Oh, please, please, come in."
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"I had to have my wisdom teeth extracted by a shoemaker."
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"I know you look at me, you think, "There's a chick who gets around.""
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"How'd you like to sense a coconut upside your head?"
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"and the day he laid down with her."
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"and a big roll of cheesecloth."
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"- Like what? - Like..."
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"Rose said there might be a waterfall."
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"Our new hotel is half a mile this way."
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"- What do you say? - Shut up, Rose."
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"Don't use the car. No parties."
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"And stay out of the liquor cabinet while we're gone."
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"Hey, who am I? Gidget? Get out of here."
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"- Do you have the tickets? - Yes, Rose."
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"- And the passports? - Yes, Rose."
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"- Dramamine? - Yes, Rose."
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"- Chewing gum to pop our ears? - Yes, Rose."
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"Did you call a cab to get to the airport?"
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"I called two. One for Blanche and me and one for you."
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"I'm just worried about travelling out of the country."
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"With the problems in the Middle East."
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"We're going to an island in the Caribbean."
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"Our biggest worry is getting strap marks."
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"Blanche, you can't take all that luggage."
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"But, Dorothy, I may run into a celebrity while I'm sunbathing."
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"I packed what I need to make me look devastating."
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"Then I hope you packed a tight butt."
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"Is this your cab or mine?"
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"Rose, there's only one cab."
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"How am I getting to the airport?"
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"I hate leaving you like this. Why don't you come with us?"
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"Come on, Sophia, it'll be fun."
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"And the resort is gorgeous. Look here."
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"Isn't that beautiful? You can have the king-size bed."
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"There's already two people in it."
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"Ma, please. If not, I'll spend my entire vacation worrying about you."
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"It'll be nice to have the house to myself."
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"I can vacuum in the nude. Now, get out of here."
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"Take care, Sophia."
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"I'll call you the minute I get to the hotel."
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"Mr Mitsumo."
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"Hi, Mr Mitsumo."
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"I've been meaning to tell you you did a lovely job getting rid of the snails."
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"It's nice not crunching when I go to the mailbox."
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"Did I mention that my daughter and her roommates just left on vacation?"
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"They'll be gone for five days."
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"Anyway, I notice"
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"we're always smiling at each other."
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"So I was thinking now that we have a little privacy,"
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"maybe sometime we could smile and talk over a glass of Tang or something."
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"Tang."
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"Tang is not the catchword here."
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"What I mean is, I think you're very nice"
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"and I thought we liked each other,"
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"you and me."
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"This is very embarrassing. You don't understand a word I'm saying."
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"Understand. Little."
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"You can put the luggage right..."
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"There would be fine, too."
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"Girls, this room looks nothing like the pictures in the brochure."
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"Well, not for $100 a night."
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"Americans. You measure everything by the dollar."
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"We're trying to learn the metric system. It's not that easy."
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"This place is like a sweatbox."
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"Oh, great. The air conditioner's not working."
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"Who needs air conditioning?"
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"We have a fresh ocean breeze and a breathtaking view."
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"We have no view."
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"When the revolution comes, and the heads of Imperialist swine"
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"are impaled on sticks stuck in the sand for people to spit on,"
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"you'll be glad you don't got a view."
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"This isn't solving anything. I'm going to call the manager."
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"Hello."
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"Hello? Great. The phone's dead."
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"Makes no difference. You only get lies from that scum-sucking pig."
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"OK. But his days are numbered."
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"When the revolution comes, he's the second to be shot."
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"- Who's the first? - Morales."
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"My next-door neighbour, who knocked up my sister."
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"This is dandy. Just dandy."
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"I should never have been talked into coming to this godforsaken place."
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"Come off it, Blanche. We agreed this is where we'd spend our vacation."
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"All I wanted was a tan on my thighs."
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"They'll rip my blouse and make me cook for the officers"
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"And, eventually, I'll catch the eye of some fat general"
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"with big sweat stains under his arms."
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"And he'll force me to let out his uniforms and satisfy his ugly needs."
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"It sounds like Christmas with my ex-husband."
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"I don't know what you are complaining about."
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"I'm the one who'll suffer most."
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"With no air conditioning, I'll get all wilted."
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"No man will talk to me."
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"How can I get dates without a telephone?"
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"The way you always do. Go sit in the bar without underwear."
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"Evening. I'm Jacques Decourville, manager of Rustling Palms"
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"and reigning island limbo king."
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"Talk to me. What's the problem here?"
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"To begin with, Mr Decourville,"
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"in here it says that every room has an ocean view."
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"Now, where is ours?"
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"Give me it. Come here, Kiddo. Here, over here."
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"Stick your head out of the window."
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"Look to the extreme left and what do you see?"
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"Two guys beating up an old lady."
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"Beyond that."
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"- The ocean. - I rest my case."
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"Wait. You call that an ocean view?"
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"You have to be a contortionist."
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"Hey, it doesn't say "great ocean view"."
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"Now, look, these accommodations are simply unacceptable."
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