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Clips from New Girl - Parents (S02E02)

"[MOUTHS] I can't do it."
New Girl
"Okay. Well, then it's off. Game over."
New Girl
"No. No way."
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"Winston. All day!"
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"[BOTH GRUNTING]"
New Girl
"- Whoa, whoa! - Whoo!"
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"I did it! I'm the one true Schmidt!"
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"- You got it, man. You can be Schmidt. WINSTON: Not on Thanksgiving!"
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"Whoo! I kissed a dude."
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"Oh, I miss Krista."
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"[SCHMIDT SIGHS]"
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"You know, she had a little mustache too."
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"I know she did."
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"You okay, Schmidt?"
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"Yes, I am."
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"Happy Thanksgiving."
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"- Give me a hug. I love you, sweetie. - Love you."
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"- Love you, sweetheart. - Love you, Mom."
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"JOAN: Love you, sweetheart."
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"Joan, I just wanna say that I'm really happy that, you know..."
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"...we got past all that. - Come here, Cece."
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"Give my little girl drugs again, I will end you."
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"- Bye, everybody. - And no more parent traps."
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"- Yeah, we're done with those. - Been there, trapped that."
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"- Bye. JESS: Love you guys. Bye."
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"[ELEVATOR DINGS]"
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"[SIGHS]"
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"I won't tell her if you don't."
New Girl
"Tell her about what?"
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"So I'll have to say I love you In a song"
New Girl
"Jess, I'm not done with that. That's $18 granola."
New Girl
"- Handmade. - Eighteen dollars?"
New Girl
"You're gonna be eating two Thanksgiving meals, so starve yourselves."
New Girl
"Jess, I get it that your parents are divorced, but can't they have one meal together?"
New Girl
"Sure they can. If they're both gagged and blindfolded."
New Girl
"Okay, listen up, guys. My mom's gonna be here at 9:00 and she's staying till 2:00."
New Girl
"And then my dad's gonna be here at 2:30 and he's gonna stay till 7:30."
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"I should also warn you guys that my mom's a little perky."
New Girl
"Wait. You think she's perky?"
New Girl
"She doesn't have my dark side. Got that from my dad."
New Girl
"Nick, you're gonna love my dad so much. He's so unhappy."
New Girl
"I'm not into dads. I'm not a dad guy. I don't like them, don't trust them."
New Girl
"[KNOCK ON DOOR]"
New Girl
"- Oh, that's her. - It's okay, man."
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"- Momsicle. - Oh, jujube."
New Girl
"- Showed up looking like a Pilgrim. - Every year."
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"- This is my mom, Joan. - Hi."
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"- This is everybody. - Hi."
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"Come on over. I wanna give y'all a big hug."
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"- Oh, come on, big Thanksgiving hug. JESS: Do it."
New Girl
"Come on, we'll do a big hug ball."
New Girl
"- Cece, you know how. - Yep."
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"- You in the white shirt. Come on in. - I don't do hug balls."
New Girl
"- Hug ball jump in. Hug ball jump in. SCHMIDT: Okay."
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"JOAN: You gotta jump in. Whoo! SCHMIDT: All right."
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"- A hug ball. JESS: Dad."
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"- Oh, hello, Bob. - You're early."
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"You know what I'm thankful for today?"
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"Divorce."
New Girl
"It's Jess"
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"No, no, no. It was my mistake. It's my mistake."
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"I'll wait five hours and come back when Joan's shift is up."
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"JOAN: Bob, just stay. What if we need something ruined?"
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"- Mom. - It's all right."
New Girl
"I'll spend my holiday at a coffee shop, sitting around with people..."
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"...who have nothing better to do on Thanksgiving than work on their screenplay."
New Girl
"I probably won't wanna blow my head off."
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"Bob, we are both grown-ups. We can make it through one day together."
New Girl
"Please, Dad?"
New Girl
"[ELEVATOR DINGS]"
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"- Well done, Jessica Day. - Pardon?"
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""My mom's coming at 9 a.m. And my dad's coming at 2:30.""
New Girl
"No idea what you're talking about."
New Girl
"The movie you made me watch a million times."
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"- Rocky IV? - Parent Trap."
New Girl
"- Yes! Unh! That's what I'm talking about. - Wow."
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"Schmidt."
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"[SIGHS]"
New Girl
"What's okay, man?"
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