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Clips from Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000) - The Accidental Text on Purpose (S09E09)

"you're trying to jump ahead with the relationship."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- She doesn't care, Dr. Phil. - Okay."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You don't know what you're talking about."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"On behalf of my adorable new girlfriend,"
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"- Thank you for coming. - Cheers."
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"Richard: Cheers. Prego."
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"Marty, cheers."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Thank you for having us. - Marty: Yes, very nice."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- You can't clink, Larry? - Why do I have to clink?"
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"- Oh. - Richard: Cheers."
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"Mmm."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"you get the urge-- I do-- that I wanna--"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I wanna stab-- I wanna stab with it."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Oh? - Jeff: Really?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Yeah, 'cause you pick up a baseball bat, you wanna swing it."
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"When you have a-- a knife,"
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"- Yeah, a little bit. - Huh? Know what they should have?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Richard: What's that? - A stabbing range."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- stab dummies. - Richard: Wow."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Where would the stabbing range be?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- In the Valley. - ( all laughing )"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"What do you think, Marilyn?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Yeah, I feel like stabbing someone."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Hmm, interesting."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Richard: This is fantastic food."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Marilyn: Mmm. - Woman: They're really good."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"What is this, tap?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Yes, it is."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"No filter. Tap water."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Huh, interesting."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Surprised you don't have a filter."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You have no filter."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- ( chuckles ) Huh, that's-- yeah. - Isn't it obvious?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- That's true. - You just say whatever comes into your mind."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"It's a good thing for me, but it's a bad thing for water."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Excuse me, I smell something burning."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Richard: LD. - Hmm?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"( scoffs ) Yeah! Wha-- how come you didn't say that when she was there?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You know, I'm a guest. I don't know."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"then Fred MacMurray gets cold feet and he backs out."
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"Of course, you're polite. And why wouldn't you be?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Jeff: That's pretty good. - ( laughter )"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Larry: Sure, sure, the water, the water."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"By the way, I'm not the only one who can't stand it."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Can't stand what?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Well, Marty likes my water."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- ( muffled ) Very good. - See?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You're really the only person"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"who has a problem with the water."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You know, it's just water. What are you so sensitive about?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I want you to go."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"( chuckles ) I'm getting kicked out?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Yeah, I think you should leave."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"This is unbelievable. Okay."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Well, it was fun. We-- we really--"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- It was not fun. - No, it wasn't."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"( whistling tune )"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You guys, look! Ah!"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Boy: Hey, bald fuck! - Kids: Bald fuck!"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Blow me, blow me!"
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"( kids shouting )"
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"Larry: You wash it! You wash it!"
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"Shut up! Shut up!"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Richard: Oh, you were right, Larry."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I blew it with Rhonda."
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"I told you it was a premature honey."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"And she's been cold ever since."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Yeah, it was bad. - I said honey."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- What's the big deal? - I told them no mushrooms in this thing."
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"- I said no mushrooms, all right? - I've lost a potential bride,"
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"and you're talking about salad?"
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"- I blew it. - You saw-- you saw a wife there"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"and you seized on it with a honey, right?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- That's what you did. - It was a seize."
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"- You seized. - I did seize."
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"- You did seize. - So, what do I do?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- I don't know. - ( phone chimes )"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Oh, great."
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"It's from Rhonda."
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""We need to talk.""
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"- Oh. - I'm through."
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"I'm taking you to Cancun.""
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"- No, that's not happening. - Is that gonna happen?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- What do I do, man? - Server: Can I get you a refill?"
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"- Okay. - What do I do?"
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"I got an idea. Text her back."
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"Tell her to come meet you at the restaurant."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Why? - When she comes in,"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"you start calling everybody honey."
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"- I do what? - Call everybody honey--"
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"- Why? - Because-- 'cause you're a guy"
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"who just uses the word honey a lot."
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"- You mean it's part of my working vocabulary? - Yes! Yes!"
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"That means that she's just part of the honey parade."
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"- I like the honey parade. - Huh?"
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"- All right, I'll have her come down. - Yeah."
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"Larry: There, she's coming. There she is."
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"- Where? - There."
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"Hi. Oh, hold on a second."
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"Honey, do you mind if I grab a chair?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Thank you, honey. - Oh, no, I don't-- um, thanks."
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"I just-- I could come back."
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"I don't wanna interrupt a whole thing."
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"No, you're not interrupting anything."
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"Excuse me, honey. Can I get..."
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"- What-- what do you want? - Oh, I'll just have a coffee."
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"A black coffee, honey."
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"That's all you want? Are you hungry?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- but maybe-- maybe I'll get a sand-- - Oh, honey, right here."
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"- The coffee. - Oh, thank you so much."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Thanks, honey. Hey, hon!"
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"You know, honey, can we get an extra napkin?"
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"Hey, could I get some coffee, honey?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Mm-hmm. - Honey? Honey?"
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"Thank you, honey."
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"Could we get the check, honey?"
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"Thank you, honey."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Thank you. - So, what did you wanna talk about?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"and wanted to see if you wanted to do something together."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Pick me up at work? I'll be done around 8:00."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
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