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Clips from Peep Show - Jeremy Makes It (S02E02)

"Well, it's the 21st century, no-one actually likes each other any more,"
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"so let's just leave it at that."
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"But I do like you! I think you're fucking great!"
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"Yeah, well, I'm sorry, but... I don't have time. OK? There's no time."
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"'Yes, little Tetraminos, you fit neatly together and dissolve"
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"Uh-huh..."
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"and I really need to borrow quite a lot of money to go back into the studio and I was thinking..."
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"That's not the favour?!"
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"Er... no. You see, the thing is, Gog..."
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"No, Jeremy. You know what Daryl's like."
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"No, sure. Yeah. Absolutely. Of course."
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"I mean, I, for example, hate mozzarella."
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"It's not the same."
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"I mean, aren't we supposed to be living in a multicultural democracy?"
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"You know, the Jews and the Muslims and the racists all living happily together, side by side,"
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"Brilliant, fantastic."
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"What did you think, Hans?"
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"Crack! Just gimme crack!"
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"Well, I loved it. If you want to print one of those out, or whatever."
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"Jeremy, don't just go!"
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"I'll suck for crack!"
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"Come on, let's get you some crack!"
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"Tell Daryl we're very grateful."
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"Great to hear from ya!"
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"You got over whatever brain attack you had in Frankie and Benny's then?"
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"'I'm safe. In my cubicle, I'm safe.'"
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"So are we off for a pint, or what?"
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"Er, Daryl, listen, the truth is..."
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"I can't be associated with you any more, because... you're a racist."
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"There's a difference. Daryl, you can't hate people because of their ethnic background!"
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"Oh, right. Political correctness gone mad."
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"No! I hate political correctness gone mad more than anyone!"
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"I don't wanna teach the world to sing, that would be horrible,"
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"That's just not on!"
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"Whereas, I Have A Dream..."
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"South Africa, Benetton... It's..."
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"I have?"
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"Fuck off! Thought police!"
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"You want your money back, don't you? He's refusing to pay up or like the track."
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"- How are you feeling, Super Hans? - Totally fine."
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"Cover. In case the cops turn up. Just a bunch of mates playing baseball."
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"Oh! Jeremy. Right, so, what, you've had more thoughts about the track?"
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"Yeah, we have, actually."
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"OK, great."
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"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
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"I've told you, it's out of my hands now. The Honda people are very hard to please."
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"Oh, Honda, Honda, Honda. Fuck Honda."
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"Nice packet of Crunchy Nut you've got here. Pretty expensive, as I recall."
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"Look, Jeremy, we can come back again, he's got the message. You're gonna pay, aren't you?"
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"All right then. We've got our answer. Let's go!"
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"Why do I have to? Why don't you do it? Punch him with the glove."
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"I can't even make a fist!"
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"The whole point of contract law, the whole point of a contract is to make sure this never happens!"
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"All right, but a word out of place and you're getting the bat."
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"Oh, really? Oh, that's great news."
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"I'm so pleased. Dave, call the police! There's people here, they're trying to kill me,"
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"they're trying to kill me!"
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"Hello, er, Dave, it's Mark here. I'm an old friend of Gog's."
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"Don't worry, we're not trying to kill him, it's just... he's never... had sushi before,"
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"It's all right, Gog, you're not meant to cook it, it's supposed to be raw!"
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"Can he call you back?"
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"Apparently he was a massive racist and not even his best friends knew."
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"Someone reported him."
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"I don't care what happened, I still think you're a bloody good guy."
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"Yeah, and good riddance, you... you fucking Nazi!"
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"And I'm so hot"
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"Oh, yeah. And you did, obviously."
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"Relax, it's not Blue Peter. Just a nice relaxing smoke of crack."
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"Gog. At school, you'd run up and sneeze in his face."
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"Gog!"
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"Wouldn't you like to know, you big prick! So what are you doing?"
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"Tell you what, that crack is really moreish!"
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"'Saturday shift! I thought we had people in Ireland to do this for us."
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"'Mmm, Sophie, with her lovely soft face."
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"See you later, guys. Soph, see you at my place. 33 Ringfield Road."
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"You bring the vino."
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"'Break with the newbie will be a pain fest, trying to chat."
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"- You want me to... - I want a kebab."
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"No! Why, were you going to go and get me one?"
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"There's already a banana-straightening machine. It's called woman."
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"About a million!"
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"Another beergee?"
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"'Better not disturb him, he might attack me and be sick. Eugh'"
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"Shove it up your arsel Shove it up your arsel"
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"Bollocks. I'm a very generous guy. Daryl's bringing his cor anglais, Nancy's singing,"
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"a kind of Jean-Michel Jarre thing on the keyboards."
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"Ey, check this out, right? Sexy girl walks past, it's like..."
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"Oh, crumbs."
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"Look, no, all right?"
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"Car alarms, the cashpoints, the blacks, the Pakis, the Jews..."
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"Exactly. All we're saying is England for the English, right?"
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"You know you're not supposed to do that!"
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"I mean, you'll never get it off entirely, but, you know."
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"just pop down the, er, Chinky. Do you want anything?"
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"What about from... the... Paki shop? Do you want anything from in there?"
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"What, you mean, am I a racist?"
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"Well... yeah."
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"Hope Jeff's neighbour got the cheque for the window."
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"But why?"
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"'because everything is simple in Tetris world.'"
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"But look at it another way - we've all got our foibles."
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"It is kind of the same."
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"'Cor anglais, of course. Probably plays it in the BNP jazz combo.'"
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"You've got to say, fair enough. Yeah?"
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"You've kicked the crack?"
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"No."
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"Right!"
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"'Don't bomb me, you wouldn't bomb a whitey! '"
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"I'm running underground with the moles digging holes."
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"I'm not sick but I'm not well"
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"'I'm the Ruhr and no-one's actually said the word "Dambusters"!"
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"Oh, relax! "Oh, I'm Mark, I'm in the '80s, I'm dying of heroin in a puddle in the corner in an advert!""
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"Oh, yes, it's nice to get away from it all, the work, the smog, the graffiti."
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"Er, heil."
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"'It's OK, he doesn't have any feelings. Racists don't have feelings, they're subhuman."
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"Yeah. OK, no. Fair enough. You've talked me round."
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"Do we have to do this? We're not going to hurt him, are we?"
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"Yeah. We thought we might smash your brains in with a baseball bat."
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"That's all there is to it."
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"Paranoia, paranoia Everybody's comin' to get me"
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