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Clips from The Cleveland Show - Cleveland Jr. Cherry Bomb (S01E01)

"("take me out to the ball game" playing over speakers)"
The Cleveland Show
"Announcer: You know what that tune means?"
The Cleveland Show
"(snickers) cleveland, it's your hot stepdaughter and her boyfriend."
The Cleveland Show
"Hold my beer, rallo."
The Cleveland Show
"Dry-humping, tongues wagging,"
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"In case she does make that choice."
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"Roberta's here today."
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"What?! I've overheard you with your friends"
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"Kids today. Just makes you think about our country's values."
The Cleveland Show
"Heck, did we ever even have our way?"
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"Someone would invite you over for coffee,"
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"And you'd wind up talking for eight straight days."
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"My question is: "an improvement on what?""
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"Causing it to be gross and much cheaper"
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"Well, thank you, cleveland, jr."
The Cleveland Show
"Then we're adjourned."
The Cleveland Show
"I need to go to the haberdasher."
The Cleveland Show
"All: Mm-hmm."
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"All right, look, look, at this point,"
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"All: Oh... Snap!"
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"Aah!"
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"You guys don't even work here."
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"(all laugh)"
The Cleveland Show
"You'll end up like this."
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"To leave them in their original packaging."
The Cleveland Show
"And as someone close to cleveland jr.'s age,"
The Cleveland Show
"I think you can help him realize the joys of being around girls."
The Cleveland Show
"See, now you need something from me, pops,"
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"* straight out of stoolbend *"
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"* I got a son *"
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"* hello, (bleep) *"
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"* but more dudes have laid on you *"
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"* I'm a cleveland steamer *"
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"(girl sobbing)"
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"Well, I called them all whores, like you said"
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"I might be a virgin,"
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""I'm cleveland jr."
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"(sobbing)"
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"And I saw people doing all sorts of naked things to each other."
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"Kendra, there's deviled eggs."
The Cleveland Show
"Whore jar?"
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"It's where a man keeps his money for prostitutes."
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"And he and ernie decided to hotwire the rascal"
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"Uh, he look like he could be your son?"
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"Yes, I am."
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"Wait, he's with two-virgine marlene."
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"No. I'm not going."
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"I'm going to stay here and see this through,"
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"Yes, you are."
The Cleveland Show
"Of being my date at the purity ball?"
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"I can do you both right here, right now"
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"He's the only boy here."
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"(laughing)"
The Cleveland Show
"(funky disco plays) * my name is cleveland brown *"
The Cleveland Show
"* right back in my hometown *"
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"* with my new family *"
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"* there's old friends and new friends *"
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"* and even a bear *"
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"* through good times and bad times *"
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"* it's true love we share *"
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"* and so I found a place *"
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"* where everyone will know *"
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"* my happy mustached face *"
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"* this is the cleveland show. *"
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"(chuckles)"
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"I love minor league baseball."
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"Nothing like watching a bunch of people I've never heard of"
The Cleveland Show
"Not play very well."
The Cleveland Show
"(bat strikes ball)"
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"(crowd cheering)"
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"One bounce! Coming along, george, coming along!"
The Cleveland Show
"Bottom of the eighth, one-nothing."
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"Too bad we were in the bathroom for that home run."
The Cleveland Show
"I'm sorry I needed you to hold my arms, daddy,"
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"But I didn't want to sit on the wet seat."
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"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."
The Cleveland Show
"Having good time at the ballgame. (music plays)"
The Cleveland Show
"Brought to you by waterman cable."
The Cleveland Show
"Waterman cable-- we're a monopoly."
The Cleveland Show
"(r&b music playing)"
The Cleveland Show
"Ooh, chocolate-vanilla swirl, chocolate-vanilla swirl!"
The Cleveland Show
"Ha! You get it, man!"
The Cleveland Show
"They're gonna make a baby derek jeter."
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"Oh. Hey, what year was she born again?"
The Cleveland Show
"She's not born again."
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"Born-agains are crazy and off-putting."
The Cleveland Show
"This will not stand!"
The Cleveland Show
"(crowd cheering)"
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"Bad hormone-riddled adolescent! Bad, bad!"
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"(crowd booing)"
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"(running up stairs)"
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"(panting)"
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"Cleveland, what is it?!"
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"It's roberta, and it's bad!"
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"Really bad!"
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"Oh, my god, what, cleveland?!"
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"This afternoon-- (panting) I'm sorry."
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"I ran up the stairs."
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"Where's roberta?! (panting and groaning)"
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"I'm gonna need... That glass of water."
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"(gulps)"
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"This afternoon at the baseball game, roberta and federline"
The Cleveland Show
"Were all over each other, groping, squeezing, petting,"
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"Probably causing a dot on his underpants."
The Cleveland Show
"They were making out at the ball game?"
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"That's it? Cleveland, roberta's fine."
The Cleveland Show
"That's why I've already had the safe-sex talk with her"
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"Donna, your idea of safe sex is why"
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"Nasty, nasty roberta."
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"Mmm, good sundaes."
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"Roberta, do you know what a hymen is?"
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"That jewish guy that works at the video store?"
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"That's right."
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"And you know what he told me?"
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"He told me that a young woman's virginity is precious."
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"Please stay a virgin, roberta."
The Cleveland Show
"Bragging about how many girls you slept with in high school."
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"True,"
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"But they were terrible women."
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"Most of them are dead!"
The Cleveland Show
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