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Clips from The Goldbergs - Graduation Day (S04E04)

"Ah, going away to college."
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"Back in the day, packing up your life"
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"for a fresh start was a sacred ritual"
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"for high-school seniors everywhere."
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"And no one was more excited to go away forever than my sister."
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"Okay, I'm all packed for college."
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"Now all I need is to befriend my R.A."
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"so that I can throw a kegger without consequences."
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"Well, you're three months early."
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"You haven't even graduated high school yet."
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"I may have jumped the gun a bit,"
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"but it's only because I'm counting down the hours"
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"until I get out of this hellhole. You get it."
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"Well, I still have three months left where you're"
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"my little baby schmoo that I want to gobble up"
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"because you're just so delicious! Nyum, nyum, nyum,"
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"- nyum, nyum, nyum, nyum! - Aww."
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"Your mom-brain is fighting this. It's funny."
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"There's nothing funny about losing a child..."
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"- to college. - Mom, face it."
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"Our family is changing."
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"Everything that you've come to know over the past few years"
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"is about to be turned on its head."
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"Don't say that!"
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"The Goldbergs will always stay the same!"
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"Nothing will ever change in this house."
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"Nothing except Lainey leaving for fashion school"
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"and basically taking a dump on my dreams."
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"Okay, fine. I acknowledge that's also big."
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"Erica and Lainey"
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"are going to college. But that's it..."
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"No more changes."
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"Hey, Ma, can you pick up some Bic razors?"
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"Mine's a little dull from scraping the old scruff."
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"No! Bad boy! You do not shave!"
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"I gotta. My old lady, Jackie, likes me smooth."
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"- But I'm your old lady. - You know, saying that"
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"kind of stuff was cute when I was a tiny child,"
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"- but now it's getting weird. - Fine."
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"Erica and Lainey are leaving."
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"My little baby boy has grown into a gangly,"
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"deep-voiced, furry young man."
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"But that's it... no more changes."
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"Look out, everybody. Make way!"
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"Erica said that I can have her room now that she's gone, right?"
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"- Oh, right. You're here, too. - That's right. From now on,"
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"it's gonna be W-M-A-R-V playing all the hits."
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"I'm calling the shots now, Bev."
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"Screw it! I give up!"
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"Nothing will ever be the same again in this house!"
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"I'm home! Nobody bother me!"
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"TV's mine!"
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"Never change, you beautiful, miserable man!"
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"It was May 17, 1980-something,"
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"and I was with my favorite girl,"
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"watching my favorite film franchise."
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"I don't want to overstate it,"
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"but "Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment""
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"is literally the most important movie of our time."
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"Sure, it's a critical darling,"
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"but if we're talking about laughs per minute, then you"
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"got to go with "Police Academy 3: Back in Training.""
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"Point taken. Hey, do you have time to stay and watch"
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""Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol"?"
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"comes out tomorrow, and we can't go in unprepared."
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"Oh, my God! I have a girlfriend"
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"who actually likes "Police Academy"!"
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"You just called me your girlfriend."
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"Oh, balls. Did I go... I went too far. I went too far."
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"I mean, no. You said it, so"
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"I'll say it, too."
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"- Boyfriend. - Girlfriend."
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"- Boyfriend. - Girlfriend."
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"- Boyfriend. - A-girlfriend."
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"- Boyfriend. - Girlfriend!"
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"Damn it! Why do you insist"
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"on ripping my heart from my shredded pecs"
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"and punting it into a cauldron of flames?"
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"Look, we only have a few months"
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"left before I go to college! Let's not waste it fighting!"
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"But I want our Barry/Lainey Summer of Love Farewell Tour"
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"- to be perfect! - And I want that, too,"
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"but this list of mandatory activities is just too much."
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"I mean, come on. Look at this... Road trips, picnics, concerts, skiing,"
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"apple picking, berry picking, pear picking..."
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"So many fruits. I don't want to work this hard."
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"Hi."
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"This sounds like an intensely personal conversation,"
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"so you may want to take it"
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"far, far away from me and my girlfriend."
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"- Boyfriend. - Girlfriend."
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"- Boyfriend. - Girlfriend."
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"Unh!"
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"Ughhhhh."
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"Look at us!"
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"Look at us closely and know that one day"
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"you'll end up just like us, you ridiculous children."
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"This is getting weird and insulting."
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"All right. You'll see. We're the future you, and it sucks hard."
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"That'll never be us, right?"
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"Come on. We're rock-solid. Nothing can shake that."
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"- Boyfriend. - Girlfriend."
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"- Boyfriend. Boyfriend. - Girlfriend. Girlfriend."
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"It was official. I had a girlfriend who liked "Police Academy.""
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"Life was finally looking up until this happened."
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"- Oh, balls. - Adam?"
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"Yep. We've all been there... Running into"
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"your ex with your new love. Naturally, I handled it like a pro."
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"Dana! Hey!"
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"How are things going up in here?"
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"I was gonna call."
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"- I'm back for the summer. - This summer?"
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"That's crazy! I'm crazy! Summer!"
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"Hot times! Fun in the sun!"
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"Camp."
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"- I'm Jackie. - Hi. Dana."
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"Sorry! Yes! Jackie, meet Dana!"
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"Dana, meet Jackie! Introductions, new friends..."
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"Not friends, just street ladies,"
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"ladies of the street. No. You know what I mean."
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