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Clips from M*A*S*H - Henry, Please Come Home (S01E01)

",‘ That overlooks the avenue;"
M*A*S*H
"—C|amp. —C|amp."
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"Thank you, music lovers."
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"— Rib cutter. — Rib cutter."
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"— You boys look a little tired. — Here‘s our gallant leader."
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"You‘re kidding, Doctor ? And I use the term because it always gets a laugh."
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"Radar, don‘t interrupt, unless it‘s a message from General Hammond."
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"Yes, sir."
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"— How do you like them apples? — You have another hit on your hands."
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"it is now my personal pride. .."
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"to award to Lieutenant Colonel Henry Blake..."
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"You people, you great doctors..."
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"But / ’m mighty grateful to all ofyou,"
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"I think back to the time when I first considered..."
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"a career in medicine..."
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"who drove a touring car that had the |sing|ass curtains."
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"Uh, he said to me,"
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"for administrative and training duties."
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"Have itfilled in Tokyo."
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"Your fighting spirit, yourlittle moods."
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"truth ofthe matter is that, uh, I‘ll miss you delinquents too."
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"Uh, you‘re the two finest cutters I‘ve ever been associated with."
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"Yes, Radar, well |—— I was, um——"
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"Let‘s get out of here."
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"and also six copies of the supply room application forms."
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"J; [Continues]"
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"— An inspection? — Yeah."
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"Actually, it‘s modeled on the Chicago sewer system. We saw it in a magazine."
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"Nobody takes our gin machine."
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"—And that‘s final. — How we gonna do it ? Shoot him?"
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"—Stab him. — Poison him."
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"forge the general ’5 signature and send him back to the 5 tates."
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"—Yeah? — I‘ll give him anesthesia."
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"— That‘s it ? — You‘re not a very creative person, Uglyjohn."
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"— Never claimed to be. —I have a question."
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"So why would Henry let himself be transferred back here?"
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"Okay, let‘s see what we got."
M*A*S*H
"Very funny."
M*A*S*H
"Yeah, that‘s what we‘re all doing—— resting on the bottom."
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"Well, you certainly seem to be suffering here, Henry."
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"I give my three lectures a week, and then my time‘s my own."
M*A*S*H
"Honey, hit that scapula real hard, will you ? I‘ve got some calcium deposits back there."
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"I have been listening, and you still don‘t make sense."
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"Yeah, your friends, the people who love you."
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"I‘d have been safer in North Korea."
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"J How do you do, How do you do How do you do J"
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"— Yeah, what‘s happening? — Hi.just a minute."
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"— Yeah, you can‘t hold food down. — Youjust missed the 4:00 barf."
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"Get your shoes on. We gotta go back."
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"— You dummy. Can‘t you keep your mouth shut? — Radar?"
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"— Sorry, Hawk. — Yeah, you‘re sorry now."
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"|didn‘t wanna tell you. I know how much he means to you."
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"abdominal cramps, chills, high fever."
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"We‘re gettin‘ out of here. One ofyou call the airport. Reserve a chopper."
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"— Maybe later, Mama. 5ayonara. — [Gong Sounds]"
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"— Come on. Lay down. — Okay, okay."
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"It‘s your colonel, son. Just relax. Where do you hurt?"
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"My gut."
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"— I was so sick |didn‘t know what I was doing. — That‘s okay, son."
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"Okay, prep this man for O.R."
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"— Find out where we’re going —I agree with Frank."
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"— He‘s gonna open me. — You‘ll be fine, son."
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"Your outfit? I built this outfitwith my own hands."
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"Now what is going on here?"
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"So we tried to get you back in the front office."
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"By making Radar fake an illness?"
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"Well, it was intended to make you feel needed."
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"— Pull up a chair, Henry. —Ten—hut!"
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"Can I buyyou a drink, big boy san?"
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"[People chattering]"
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"[ Bomb Exploding]"
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"JWith someone sharing a delightful J"
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"— Hawkeye, shut up, will you? —Yeah, shut up."
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"— How‘s it going? — We‘re ahead on points."
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"— Suture. — Suture."
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"That‘s cat gut."
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"The wound was infected. I assumed you didn‘t want silk."
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"Lieutenant, you‘re not here to assume."
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"Settle down, Frank. Forget it. Carry on."
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"Yes, sir, I‘m—— I‘m working."
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"Working .7 He could be arrested for loitering in front ofan operating table."
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"— Did you hearthat, Colonel? — Pipe down, Pierce."
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"Hello, you beautiful day."
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"— Whoo. Hoo—hoo. — Sometimes you gotta throw back some ofthe young ones."
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"Man ! How ‘bout a rubdown?"
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"— Where did you find her? — Right there."
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"— Henry was terrific in there. — Wasn‘t he good?"
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"— Well, I must tell you guys that was some fancy cutting in there. — Thankyou, Henry."
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"Colonel !"
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"— Yes, Frank? —I intend to file insubordination charges against Ginger Bayliss."
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"Insubordination on account ofa suture?"
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"- Sir? — Not now, Radar."
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"Youjust keep pushing around the medical staff, you see what happens."
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"— Are you threatening a superior officer? — Now, hold it!"
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"—Frank, I‘ll be in my office in an hour. —Yes, sir. Thankyou, sir."
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"—[ Radar] Uh, sir. — Now I‘ll talk Frank out ofit,"
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"butyou lay offhim, all ofyou."
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"He‘s a good surgeon and we need him. Pierce, one day he‘s gonna throw the book at you..."
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"— and I won‘t be there to help. —I have a message from General Hammond."
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"— Are we surrendering? — Hey, listen to this."
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"”The 4077th has now achieved a 90% efficiency rating."
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"”The best record ofany medical unit operating in Korea."
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"Congratulations on a fine performance. Gen. Hammond.”"
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"They‘ll be dancing in the street."
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"[ Gen. Hammond] A record unmatched b y any other medical unit in Korea."
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"the Special Citation of Merit, Fourth Class."
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"Hey, look at Henry. He looks like he‘s gonna have a baby."
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"Um,well, this comes as a complete surprise to me."
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"No man wins an award like this on his own."
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"and you swell gals who..."
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"made this possible are just too numerous to mention."
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"Who, incidentally, is in command ofthis unit..."
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"[ Chuckling]"
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"Standing here today proud as punch, |, uh——"
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"hack in Bloomington, Illinois."
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"Our family doctor, a nice old codger..."
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"-I have one more announcement. — I‘m sorry."
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"effective immediately."
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"[Bomb Exploding]"
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"— And I know you have to go right over to O. R. — Yeah."
M*A*S*H
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