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Clips from South Park - Obama Wins! (S16E16)

"That was not the deal! We will not be bullied by you!"
South Park
"Well, then I guess we're about to play a game of chicken, General Tsao."
South Park
"I get it. General Tsao's ch-chi-chicken."
South Park
"You are absolutely sure about this?"
South Park
"It's been confirmed, Mike. My God, we may have won this thing."
South Park
"Sir?"
South Park
"Sir, we have some incredible news."
South Park
"Just old junk and boxes of Eric's mom's dildos."
South Park
"Well, keep looking!"
South Park
"Oh, my goodness, what's going on?"
South Park
"Sorry, Ms. Cartman,"
South Park
"I've told him to respect people's property. What did he take?"
South Park
"He stole ballots in all the swing states"
South Park
"so the wrong person was elected president."
South Park
"There's nothing here, Kyle. Not even one Scooby clue."
South Park
"Oh, my God, you guys! Look!"
South Park
"Just what the Dickens is going on here, ha ha?"
South Park
"What's this about a deal with the Chinese?!"
South Park
"I own the Death Star, I own Tatooine, it's all mine."
South Park
"Alright, fuckers."
South Park
"Where are the missing ballots?"
South Park
"Butters."
South Park
"I didn't say anything! I promise."
South Park
"Please, Eric! I tried to be quiet, I swear!"
South Park
"Nobody's going to find the election ballots."
South Park
"A place in town people barely even know exists."
South Park
"Hey, guys! Lookin' to buy a Hummer today?"
South Park
"We're having a Rocktober sales event that's goin' into Rockvember."
South Park
"Hey, there!"
South Park
"Interested in test driving a Hummer today?"
South Park
"I can see you... the Ray Bans, got that nice bicep hanging out"
South Park
"the window rolled down. What do you think?"
South Park
"Hey, why don't you shut up?"
South Park
"Just excited about these deals, that's all."
South Park
"the reason this country works is because people go out and vote."
South Park
"You only care about the election results because"
South Park
"Romney would have been tougher on the Chinese."
South Park
"Why don't you just tell me where the missing ballots are?"
South Park
"It'll make your death a lot less painful, ha, ha."
South Park
"If you kill me then Obama will stay president and you'll lose"
South Park
"Pretty neat, huh? How would you like to have one?"
South Park
"I can get those at Kmart. If you want me to switch sides"
South Park
"And there has to be a character called Jewbacca!"
South Park
"I don't give two shits in a popsicle."
South Park
"Well, then, I suppose that making the votes public"
South Park
"I can get the ballots for you."
South Park
"Sure thing! I got a Tonton coming up my asshole. Haha."
South Park
"- Haha! - Haha!"
South Park
"This is Breaking Election News!"
South Park
"Hold that phone!"
South Park
"that hundreds of thousands of ballots for Mitt Romney were stolen."
South Park
"We need everyone's help here. What you're looking for are big"
South Park
"boxes of ballots, hundreds of them."
South Park
"Please check your basements, your attics."
South Park
"And you claim that a General Tsao hired your friend Fat Ass to steal the ballots."
South Park
"Yeah, well, probably because General Tsao's chicken."
South Park
"Is that it? Did he just... did he just..."
South Park
"Yes, Chris we are getting confirmation that was the millionth time!"
South Park
"Excitement and revelry in South Park as a little boy has just"
South Park
"made the General Tsao's chicken joke for the one millionth time!"
South Park
"- What? - Little boy, the General Tsao's chicken joke,"
South Park
"a favorite for years, you've just hit the magic number how's it feel?"
South Park
"He's being presented the check now."
South Park
"A five thousand dollar gift certificate to PF Chang's."
South Park
"This has been a long campaign but someone's finally done it, wolf."
South Park
"Well, we tried dude."
South Park
"It just seems so unfair."
South Park
"People won't ever even know that the wrong man is in the White House."
South Park
"Well, I mean, look at it this way."
South Park
"Almost half the country did actually vote for Obama."
South Park
"If the election really just came down to a bunch of boxes Cartman stole,"
South Park
"then, does it matter that much?"
South Park
"for our big Christmas in Humvember sale!"
South Park
"Not sure what to get your loved one this holiday season?"
South Park
"Why not give them a nice Hummer?"
South Park
"Nothing beats a Hummer on Christmas morning!"
South Park
"Uh, forever ago. Like 2010."
South Park
"Got some 2009s here."
South Park
"Never been driven... ever."
South Park
"- Look! There they are! - Hey! Hi there!"
South Park
"You kids like Hummers, huh? Lemme show you these babies!"
South Park
"We found it, you guys!"
South Park
"- Get out of our way. - No!"
South Park
"These don't belong to you. They belong to the people!"
South Park
"I am tired of playing games! This little farce is over!"
South Park
"I don't think so, General Tsao. This way, Officers!!"
South Park
"Oh my God, it's a sales rush!"
South Park
"Are those what I think they are?"
South Park
"Sir, we found something. At the Hummer sales lot outside of town."
South Park
"You don't understand!"
South Park
"We are trying to protect the greatest film series ever made!"
South Park
"What the hell is going on here?"
South Park
"Perhaps I can explain it to you."
South Park
"You see, it turns out"
South Park
"the only reason the Chinese so desperately wanted Star Wars"
South Park
"is because they're afraid that Disney might not be the right place for it."
South Park
"Is that Morgan Freeman?"
South Park
"If these ballots are made public"
South Park
"then the man that people voted for will be president,"
South Park
"but he will no doubt keep Star Wars from the Chinese"
South Park
"And so we have to ask ourselves:"
South Park
"Unit four, what is it? Over?"
South Park
"Well, kid?"
South Park
"Come in! Unit four, come in! What have you found?"
South Park
"We just found some tremendous deals on cars nobody wants, that's all."
South Park
"Barkley, out."
South Park
"♪ Goin' down to South Park gonna leave my woes behind"
South Park
"I've got something I need to show you."
South Park
"Line two from China for you, sir."
South Park
"Please, you've got to believe me!"
South Park
"Whenever I'm confused about what's going on in a movie"
South Park
"I'm always so relieved when Morgan Freeman shows up and explains the plot to me."
South Park
"What's going on is the sale of America's greatest asset."
South Park
"You see, when the United States created Star Wars"
South Park
"take the rights from Disney if they helped him get re-elected."
South Park
"There are rumors of hundreds of thousands of stolen ballots."
South Park
"There's nothing here, Kyle."
South Park
"Anything in the basement, Jimmy?"
South Park
"Dude, it's Boba Fett's ship!"
South Park
"I own all this shit now!"
South Park
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