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Clips from South Park - An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig (S01E01)

"- Hi, Shelly. - You looking at my headgear?"
South Park
"What headgear?"
South Park
"- You looking at my headgear? - I didn't really notice."
South Park
"- You little liar! - I think it looks terrific! It matches..."
South Park
"Nobody's splicing from Fluffy!"
South Park
"Can I help you?"
South Park
"Yeah. We wanna crossbreed an elephant with a pig."
South Park
"No, little potbellied elephants that people can keep as pets."
South Park
"That's an even better idea. Come on in."
South Park
"I'm so pleased that you're interested in genetic engineering."
South Park
"Nobody will hurt you."
South Park
"Thanks to genetic engineering, there will be an end..."
South Park
"...to hunger, disease, pollution, even war."
South Park
"For instance, here's a monkey with four asses."
South Park
"- How does that make the world better? - My four-assed ostrich."
South Park
"My four-assed mongoose."
South Park
"Have anything besides four-assed animals?"
South Park
"I have rats spliced with ducks, gorillas spliced with mosquitoes."
South Park
"Here, I have rabbits spliced with fish to make little bunny fish."
South Park
"These bunny ears are tied on with strings!"
South Park
"Here, Swiss cheese spliced with chalk and a beard."
South Park
"- What about our potbellied elephant? - Well, I'm sorry, children."
South Park
"Pig and elephant DNA won't splice. Have you heard that song by Loverboy?"
South Park
"Keep your hands off of Fluffy!"
South Park
"It's amazing what we can do with a little blood sample these days."
South Park
"- What? Excuse me. - Why are you taking Stan's blood?"
South Park
"Pardon me, I tripped. Could I have some hair?"
South Park
"- Watch out, genetic engineers are crazy! - Come on, Fluffy!"
South Park
"- This gas is hurting my anus. - That's pretty fresh."
South Park
"I sure am hungry."
South Park
"My father's family name being Pirrip and my name, Phillip..."
South Park
"French people piss me off."
South Park
"- No, we're already halfway done. - Then all you've got is a stupid pig."
South Park
"Hello, children."
South Park
"- A pig-elephant? That's not a bad idea. - I told you guys."
South Park
"Imagine a pint-sized elephant that you could keep in the house."
South Park
"Children, we could make a fortune with this."
South Park
"Forget about that genetic engineering."
South Park
"If you want to combine a pig and an elephant, get them to make sweet love."
South Park
"Sure they would, if you get them in the mood."
South Park
"An elephant takes a while to get drunk."
South Park
"Use family love as a weapon against her."
South Park
"Next time she kicks your ass, tell her, "Shelly, you're my sister. I love you.""
South Park
"No elephant is gonna make love to Fluffy! I will kick you in the nuts!"
South Park
"Crap!"
South Park
"And now back to Jesus and Pals..."
South Park
"Beautiful, it's absolutely beautiful. My son, I think we've finally done it."
South Park
"Yes, we have, Dad. My very own human clone."
South Park
"- Hope it's not a gay clone. - Yeah. That's so stupid."
South Park
"- Damn it! This won't work! - Hello, children."
South Park
"I'm checking to see how our little entrepreneurial adventure is going."
South Park
"Children, you can't stick a drunk pig with a drunk elephant..."
South Park
"...and expect them to do the mattress mambo."
South Park
"Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Elton John!"
South Park
"Thank you, Elton."
South Park
"Look, it's working!"
South Park
"Now, children, gather around and watch the wonders of life."
South Park
"The beauty of mother nature."
South Park
"How luscious, our creature has come to fruition."
South Park
"- Dad, you're the best. - Oh, my God! He only has one ass!"
South Park
"He's of no use to me. I'll have to burn the room."
South Park
"This entire experiment is turning out very bad."
South Park
"Me bad?"
South Park
"- He's too dangerous, son. - But, Dad, I want a human clone!"
South Park
"Son, no!"
South Park
"They're all stupid anyway. Come on, guys, let's go."
South Park
"They're all gay."
South Park
"Aren't they ever gonna wake up?"
South Park
"They will. It's gonna be one ugly sight."
South Park
"Usually about 9:30 a.m., children."
South Park
"Here we go."
South Park
"There's nothing worse than getting drunk and waking up next to a pig."
South Park
"- Or an elephant. - How do we know if she's pregnant?"
South Park
"We might not know for a couple of days."
South Park
"Good job, Einstein! Why don't we build a rocket?"
South Park
"An elephant have sex with a pig."
South Park
"- No, I said odd. - You're that crazy cracker from the hill."
South Park
"Never mind. There's been an incident at the ranch."
South Park
"I created a large mutant clone of that little boy there, and he's broken free."
South Park
"Stan, are you wearing a different hat?"
South Park
"How big is he? I bet he weighs 400 pounds!"
South Park
"Come on, Stan, don't you know where you would go?"
South Park
"Oh, my God!"
South Park
"It appears that the destructive creature is 8-year-old Stan Marsh of South Park."
South Park
"Asked why he was wreaking havoc on his hometown..."
South Park
"Police request that if you see this boy..."
South Park
"...you immediately kill him and burn his body."
South Park
"Now back to Jesus and Pals."
South Park
"You boys watch The X Files too much."
South Park
"There's no such thing as genetic clone..."
South Park
"- Come on, let's go! - There you are!"
South Park
"It wasn't me, it was my evil clone."
South Park
"What the hell has gotten into you? You have got severe lunchroom duty!"
South Park
"I'm gonna have a word with your father!"
South Park
"- Wait till your father hears about this. - Wait, Stan, there he goes."
South Park
"Stop!"
South Park
"Shelly has a wire in her mouth and a metal plate on her back."
South Park
"When you see Shelly, kick her ass. Shelly very bad!"
South Park
"- Me bad? - No, Shelly bad. You good."
South Park
"He's tearing up the house. Stop him!"
South Park
"What the hell do you want?"
South Park
"- I'm lusciously sorry for everything. - They got our clone. He belongs to us."
South Park
"I tried to play God and I failed."
South Park
"Daddy, no!"
South Park
"All I wanted was to genetically engineer something useful. I failed."
South Park
"Perhaps we shouldn't toy with God's creations."
South Park
"Perhaps we should leave nature alone to its simple one-assed schematics."
South Park
"I ain't helping. I wanna eat pie."
South Park
"- You can't leave me here alone! - Watch me."
South Park
"We have to find out if Cartman's pig is pregnant."
South Park
"It isn't fair. Everybody hates me."
South Park
"The whole town wants me killed. Mom and Dad are gonna send me away."
South Park
"What in God's name have you been doing?"
South Park
"Everybody in town is upset with you."
South Park
"It's not Stan's fault. It wasn't Stan. He was..."
South Park
"He was with me the whole time."
South Park
"Well, we're sorry we jumped to conclusions."
South Park
"Oh, honey. Please forgive us, son."
South Park
"Shelly, you saved my life. And yet you've done so much more."
South Park
"Everyone, let's give Casey and his weed a big hand."
South Park
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