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Clips from The Great North - Tusk in the Wind Adventure (S01E01)

"Uh-oh. Is this a warning?"
The Great North
"(gasps) Do we need to pack our things and go on the run?"
The Great North
"What? (laughs) No."
The Great North
"You've never heard of"
The Great North
"The Alaskan Adventures of Tusk Johnson?"
The Great North
"It was a hit TV show for years."
The Great North
"Local Alaska public access."
The Great North
"He's basically Dad's favorite person."
The Great North
"And Wolf's favorite person who isn't Dad."
The Great North
"I can't believe he's actually here in Lone Moose."
The Great North
"Word is he's been living in the woods"
The Great North
"with a pack of wolves since his show ended."
The Great North
"Apparently, he's actually faster running on four legs"
The Great North
"-than on two now. -This was a TV show that people actually watched?"
The Great North
"Just a guy wandering around in the woods?"
The Great North
"Hell yeah. But, oh, how he wandered."
The Great North
"How... he... wandered."
The Great North
"Okay, you know I don't like to throw around the phrase"
The Great North
""white nonsense," but this definitely qualifies."
The Great North
"The man was a legend, unmatched in the Alaskan arts."
The Great North
"And unmatched in kick-ass theme songs."
The Great North
"-Check this out. -♪ He lives in the woods ♪"
The Great North
"♪ And survives on the land ♪"
The Great North
"♪ And he never met a beast that he couldn't tame ♪"
The Great North
"♪ He'll take down a bear, fight a wolf in his lair ♪"
The Great North
"♪ If you live in the wild then you know his name ♪"
The Great North
"♪ It's Tusk Johnson, mountain man ♪"
The Great North
"♪ Living in the woods just because he can ♪"
The Great North
"♪ Tusk Johnson, mountain man ♪"
The Great North
"♪ Did we mention that Tusk has a sidekick, Dan? ♪"
The Great North
"Wait, I have seen this guy,"
The Great North
"at the Russian restaurant yesterday."
The Great North
"According to Zoya, he's been hanging out there"
The Great North
"every night this week, but his hair was grayer"
The Great North
"and he had a shirt on."
The Great North
"I noticed him because he ordered a "soup cup of ranch,""
The Great North
"and I thought to myself, "Uh-huh, game recognize game.""
The Great North
"He's been here all week? I knew there was something in the air."
The Great North
"I thought it was just another accident"
The Great North
"they were covering up at the oil refinery."
The Great North
"But it must have been Tusk."
The Great North
"And he's hanging out at our very own Russian restaurant?"
The Great North
"Dad, are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
The Great North
"-We should leave him alone. -We should go meet him."
The Great North
"Well, I guess it might be okay to look at him"
The Great North
"from across the room."
The Great North
"Wait, Dad, it's your night to pick the movie."
The Great North
"Yes, and I take that role seriously, which is why"
The Great North
"I keep this box of preapproved VHS recorded movies"
The Great North
"for the family, ready to go in the event"
The Great North
"of my untimely death."
The Great North
"Wow, we would be devastated. But the show must go on."
The Great North
"(sighs) Fine."
The Great North
"I guess we'll start the movie without you guys."
The Great North
"That's the spirit."
The Great North
"(gasps) What's Dy-nasty?"
The Great North
"-Oh, Dynasty. -Mm."
The Great North
"There are a bunch in here with that written on them"
The Great North
"in Mom's handwriting."
The Great North
"We'll just give it five minutes, then pop it out"
The Great North
"and watch a real mov... (gasps)"
The Great North
"What strange glamour is this?"
The Great North
"Look at those office buildings."
The Great North
"Denver. We have to go there."
The Great North
"She calls to me."
The Great North
"Oh, hello, Wayne Northrop. And good day, John Forsythe."
The Great North
"-Dad, it's him. -Oh!"
The Great North
"-Wow. -Am I crazy,"
The Great North
"or does he have a glow?"
The Great North
"BEEF: Oh, he's gorgeous."
The Great North
"-We gotta say hi. -Wait, Wolf!"
The Great North
"(shuddering): Ha... ha..."
The Great North
"Uh, hi?"
The Great North
"(squeakily): Ha-ha-ha... Hi."
The Great North
"(high-pitched): Ha..."
The Great North
"-(clears throat) Hi. -Hi."
The Great North
"-(stammering): Hi. Hi. Ha. -(clears throat) Hi. Hi..."
The Great North
"A-Are you guys singing?"
The Great North
"Are you, like, the male Judds?"
The Great North
"BOTH (straining): You're Tusk Johnson."
The Great North
"Yes, I am. (sniffs)"
The Great North
"That smell, is that..."
The Great North
"It's probably me. When I'm nervous,"
The Great North
"my sweat smells like Cheetos and Brut for men."
The Great North
"No, no, this is more like oil and Damascus steel."
The Great North
"The kind of a scent you might give off"
The Great North
"if you were carrying a full-tang fixed bobcat knife"
The Great North
"with a one-piece wood handle."
The Great North
"Hammer-forged blade, grain leather,"
The Great North
"with an aniline-finish sheath."
The Great North
"The C-17 Beast Tracker. Nice."
The Great North
"Uh, I have one, too. It's broken and I lost it."
The Great North
"Let me buy you fellas a drink. Three whiskeys."
The Great North
"I'll have my whiskey with a root beer back"
The Great North
"and a Sprite chaser, and then"
The Great North
"another Sprite, just separately."
The Great North
"Wait, so Adam was lying to Claudia about Blake"
The Great North
"-the whole time? -Yeah."
The Great North
"He just wanted to take over her father's company."
The Great North
"I've learned so much about how to be an adult tonight."
The Great North
"There's more face slapping than I'd ever dared dream."
The Great North
"(all singing): ♪ Tusk Johnson, mountain man ♪"
The Great North
"♪ Did we mention that Tusk has a sidekick, Dan? ♪"
The Great North
"-Man, I have so many questions about the show. -Me, too."
The Great North
"Did you really eat all those bees,"
The Great North
"-even though you're allergic? -You have that backwards."
The Great North
"Bees are actually allergic to me."
The Great North
"Man, it is good to meet folks"
The Great North
"with a real enthusiasm for the wild."
The Great North
"That's why I came back to Alaska to shoot my new show."
The Great North
"-No... way. -Wait. What?!"
The Great North
"-No... no way! -What?!"
The Great North
"Yes way. I am making The New Alaskan Adventures"
The Great North
"of Tusk Johnson, but I'm shooting this one myself."
The Great North
"-Down and dirty. -Oh, that is so cool."
The Great North
"Oh, man, Mr. Johnson, we didn't just watch your show."
The Great North
"We actually tried some of your wildest outdoor challenges."
The Great North
"I even rafted down some rapids on a single log, just like you."
The Great North
"Well, we both did it. Father and son,"
The Great North
"side by side on the river, mounted upon logs,"
The Great North
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