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Clips from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt - Kimmy Is Bad at Math! (S01E01)

"The things you say You're unbelievable"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Simply molasses Told Mimi Kanassis"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Pushing up the radishes, bring..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Ugh! Unbelievable."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"This is the Cherry Hill Fountain."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"You probably recognize it"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"from the opening of the show Friends."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Great Chandler's ghost! From TV?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Right here in Central Park?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Central Perk. I just got that!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"And there's George and Jerry from Seinfeld?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Only in New York, kids."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Unbreakable"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"They alive, damn it"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"It's a miracle"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Unbreakable"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"They alive, damn it"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"But females are strong as hell"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Unbreakable"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"They alive, damn it"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"It's a miracle"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Unbreakable"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"They alive, damn it"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"That's gonna be, uh..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"you know, a fascinating transition."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Damn it"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Jeez, we were supposed to start 20 minutes ago, Sonja!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Where's the rest of study group?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"You shouldn't be able to see me."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm wearing the hat."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Has everyone dropped out?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I know Fatima got deported."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Jason is stuck on that missing G train."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Steve Harwell is back on tour as the lead singer of Smash Mouth."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"He's not gonna learn English that way!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"And that guy Dong hasn't shown up once!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm never going to pass this thing if I don't get some help,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"especially with math."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'll give you some true mathematics."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"The Olsen twins, they're four people."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Think about it."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Well, this is a disaster."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I guess you and I might as well just..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Sonja? Where are you?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I put on my hat."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Kimmy residence, Kimmy speaking."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Well, he's gone."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Julian checked into the Dominique Strauss-Kahn Suite"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"at the Sofitel."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm so sorry."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"But it's for the best."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"He's been sending me gifts all day, trying to get me back."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"A diamond necklace, a bouquet of dogs."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"You have to stay strong."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"He cheated on you with your couples therapist."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Right, people get divorced all the time."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Like my friend, Mimi Kanassis."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"She's doing great."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"She just got back from Italy with her boyfriend."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"And her ex-husband died on top of his new wife."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"- Like in bunk beds? - Listen."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm meeting my lawyer in an hour."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I know it's your day off, and you're probably doing something"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"in New Jersey, but I need you there to hold my hand."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Of course, I'm here for you."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'll have my girl text you the lawyer's address."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"- You mean me? - Thank you!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Well, I'm off to"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Professor Dracula's Spooky Laboratory and Bar and Grill."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Cool, you're a werewolf, like in the bible!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Actually, I'm not exactly a werewolf,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm a Frankenwolf."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"And before you say anything,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"yes, I know my name isn't really Frankenwolf,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm just a creature created by Dr. Frankenwolf."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Give it a break, nerds."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Wait, why aren't you at the libbary?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"My study group has already fallen apart."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Can you teach me math?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Girl, didn't you just hear me say "libbary"?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I went to public school in Mississippi."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"They told us dinosaurs went extinct"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"because an asteroid turned them gay."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Well, this blows chunks."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm never gonna get my high school diploma."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I need Dong."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Trust me, that's not going to solve all your problems."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Dong is the name of the Vietnamese guy in my class."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"- He's good at math. - That's racist."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"But he is good at math."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I don't make the rules."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Well, there goes the neighborhood,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"they covered that open manhole."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"So we can stop carrying around an old oar to keep"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"from falling in?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Kids, this can only mean one thing."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Gentrification is coming."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I mean, pretty soon, we'll be out on our asses"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"'cause some yuppie thinks the building has "good bones.""
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"We can't let them find my husband's bones."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"So Julian agrees to cede primary custody,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"but he gets weekends and holidays."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"But that's not fair to Vera."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Housekeepers need structure and stability."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Sorry, but this prenup is pretty ironclad."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"The good news is you never violated the infidelity clause."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"But Julian did."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Unfortunately, it only pertained to you."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Pursuant to the codicil, paragraph three, Mr. Voorhees"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"retained the right to..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
""stick it wherever.""
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"At the end of the day, the financial settlement"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"is what it is."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Oh, God, it's peanuts!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Mrs. Voorhees, I live with a very serious peanut allergy,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"so excuse me if I don't find that funny."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I don't think I can do this."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Don't say that."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"You're stronger than you think."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"Look, the only thing that matters is your freedom."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
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