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Clips from Uncoupled - Chapter 2 (S01E01)

My partner and I are excited

"My partner and I are excited"

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to be showing you the presentation we put together for your apartment.

"to be showing you the presentation we put together for your apartment."

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Um, your timing of the market is just top-notch.

"Um, your timing of the market is just top-notch."

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Well, I've always been known for my perfect timing.

"Well, I've always been known for my perfect timing."

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Right as he left,

"Right as he left,"

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I asked my husband why he started shaving his balls all of a sudden.

"I asked my husband why he started shaving his balls all of a sudden."

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Did he want them to match his hairless head?

"Did he want them to match his hairless head?"

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Do you know what he said to me?

"Do you know what he said to me?"

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"I'm so glad you asked, Claire."

""I'm so glad you asked, Claire.""

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"Perfect timing. I did it for Layla."

""Perfect timing. I did it for Layla.""

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-This is where you say, "Who's Layla?" -Oh.

"-This is where you say, "Who's Layla?" -Oh."

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Who's Layla?

"Who's Layla?"

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His 25-year-old Pilates instructor

"His 25-year-old Pilates instructor"

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with whom he's decided to spend the second half of his life.

"with whom he's decided to spend the second half of his life."

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The second half!

"The second half!"

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Because clinically obese men often live to 130.

"Because clinically obese men often live to 130."

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-Where are you sitting? -Oh, over there with some friends.

"-Where are you sitting? -Oh, over there with some friends."

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My shrink told me it's important for me to start going out,

"My shrink told me it's important for me to start going out,"

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even when I don't feel like it, which is what I am doing here.

"even when I don't feel like it, which is what I am doing here."

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Well, I'm glad that you are,

"Well, I'm glad that you are,"

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-because you look amazing.

"-because you look amazing."

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And you should not be denying the world the pleasure of you.

"And you should not be denying the world the pleasure of you."

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You've already got the meeting.

"You've already got the meeting."

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-I'm gonna go find my table. -All right. Have a great evening.

"-I'm gonna go find my table. -All right. Have a great evening."

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Don't outbid me now.

"Don't outbid me now."

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I promise not to.

"I promise not to."

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Adopt a bench,

"Adopt a bench,"

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dedicate a paving stone, donate flowers, endow a tree.

"dedicate a paving stone, donate flowers, endow a tree."

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There are so many ways

"There are so many ways"

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to support this glorious park that belongs to all New Yorkers.

"to support this glorious park that belongs to all New Yorkers."

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Now, please, enjoy your meal.

"Now, please, enjoy your meal."

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-Looks like Tyler is a no-show. -Yeah, no surprise.

"-Looks like Tyler is a no-show. -Yeah, no surprise."

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-He doesn't wanna face me.

"-He doesn't wanna face me."

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But he can't keep running forever.

"But he can't keep running forever."

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You'd be amazed the lengths people will go to avoid confrontation.

"You'd be amazed the lengths people will go to avoid confrontation."

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-Textbook narcissistic behavior. -Yeah!

"-Textbook narcissistic behavior. -Yeah!"

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Some will even secretly move their things out of your apartment

"Some will even secretly move their things out of your apartment"

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before breaking up with you.

"before breaking up with you."

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Ugh.

"Ugh."

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There he is.

"There he is."

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I'm sure that he saw me and now he's afraid to come to our table.

"I'm sure that he saw me and now he's afraid to come to our table."

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-No. -What are you doing?

"-No. -What are you doing?"

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I gotta talk to him. I mean, that is bullshit, right?

"I gotta talk to him. I mean, that is bullshit, right?"

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-Not here. You've been drinking all night. -Let go of me.

"-Not here. You've been drinking all night. -Let go of me."

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Don't get into a fight at a charity event.

"Don't get into a fight at a charity event."

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-It's tacky. -Stop handling my--

"-It's tacky. -Stop handling my--"

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You can't possibly know how to fight! Gah--

"You can't possibly know how to fight! Gah--"

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Tyler! Tyler.

"Tyler! Tyler."

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Hello, Michael.

"Hello, Michael."

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I'd really like to know exactly when this started.

"I'd really like to know exactly when this started."

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When what started?

"When what started?"

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Please. You know you're avoiding me.

"Please. You know you're avoiding me."

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You're too much of a coward to sit in your own seat.

"You're too much of a coward to sit in your own seat."

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I'm sitting with my mother.

"I'm sitting with my mother."

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She's a co-host of this event, and we have our own table.

"She's a co-host of this event, and we have our own table."

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The only reason Empire Realty bought a table is thanks to me.

"The only reason Empire Realty bought a table is thanks to me."

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That's why you're here.

"That's why you're here."

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I know what's going on with you and Colin.

"I know what's going on with you and Colin."

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My neighbor saw you helping him move out of my building.

"My neighbor saw you helping him move out of my building."

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I thought Colin not telling you about me might make things awkward.

"I thought Colin not telling you about me might make things awkward."

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"Awkward"? Are you fucking kidding me?

""Awkward"? Are you fucking kidding me?"

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You break up my relationship, and you think it might be awkward?

"You break up my relationship, and you think it might be awkward?"

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What the hell are you talking about?

"What the hell are you talking about?"

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I'm sorry Colin left you,

"I'm sorry Colin left you,"

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but the only thing going on between us is that I found an apartment for him.

"but the only thing going on between us is that I found an apartment for him."

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Wh-- And you expect me to believe that?

"Wh-- And you expect me to believe that?"

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Suzanne saw you with him in his apartment on the High Line, dude.

"Suzanne saw you with him in his apartment on the High Line, dude."

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I helped him move a few things in.

"I helped him move a few things in."

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I provide that level of service to all of my clients.

"I provide that level of service to all of my clients."

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It's called going the extra mile.

"It's called going the extra mile."

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-I-- -But I am not having an affair with Colin.

"-I-- -But I am not having an affair with Colin."

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He's old.

"He's old."

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Not that old. A few years older than me.

"Not that old. A few years older than me."

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Really? You're the younger one?

"Really? You're the younger one?"

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Look, if it makes you feel any better, I've seen no evidence of another guy.

"Look, if it makes you feel any better, I've seen no evidence of another guy."

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I really don't think he left you for anybody.

"I really don't think he left you for anybody."

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I've gotta get to my table. Sorry.

"I've gotta get to my table. Sorry."

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Oh, uh, one more thing.

"Oh, uh, one more thing."

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Would you stop bugging Claire Lewis about her apartment?

"Would you stop bugging Claire Lewis about her apartment?"

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It's really embarrassing.

"It's really embarrassing."

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I've told you before, she's my mother's friend.

"I've told you before, she's my mother's friend."

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I'm getting the listing.

"I'm getting the listing."

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You look gorgeous enough to make me straight tonight.

"You look gorgeous enough to make me straight tonight."

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Oh!

"Oh!"

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You are so…

"You are so…"

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-How'd it go? -Ah…

"-How'd it go? -Ah…"

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Colin's not having a fling.

"Colin's not having a fling."

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He didn't leave me for Tyler. He didn't leave me for anyone.

"He didn't leave me for Tyler. He didn't leave me for anyone."

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He just wanted to leave me.

"He just wanted to leave me."

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Which somehow feels even worse.

"Which somehow feels even worse."

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It felt so satisfying

"It felt so satisfying"

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to tell myself this story that Colin left me for Tyler

"to tell myself this story that Colin left me for Tyler"

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because it made him look so shallow,

"because it made him look so shallow,"

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but really Tyler was just helping him plot his escape

"but really Tyler was just helping him plot his escape"

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like I was holding him hostage.

"like I was holding him hostage."

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I just don't know what to do with all this anger.

"I just don't know what to do with all this anger."

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You know what? You're gonna put it into your work.

"You know what? You're gonna put it into your work."

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Wait until Claire sees the presentation we put together for her.

"Wait until Claire sees the presentation we put together for her."

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I don't care what kind of friend she is to his mother.

"I don't care what kind of friend she is to his mother."

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There's no way she's entrusting her apartment to that millennial fraud.

"There's no way she's entrusting her apartment to that millennial fraud."

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-Mm. -We're not getting played on this one.

"-Mm. -We're not getting played on this one."

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Shit.

"Shit."

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"Unfortunately, Miss Lewis is unable to meet with you at this time."

""Unfortunately, Miss Lewis is unable to meet with you at this time.""

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"Thank you for your consideration."

""Thank you for your consideration.""

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"Dictated, not read."

""Dictated, not read.""

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We got played.

"We got played."

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Not this time.

"Not this time."

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Excuse me, sorry. Emergency.

"Excuse me, sorry. Emergency."

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71st and Park.

"71st and Park."

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Claire!

"Claire!"

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Claire!

"Claire!"

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Michael, what did I say about loud voices in the lobby?

"Michael, what did I say about loud voices in the lobby?"

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I'm sorry.

"I'm sorry."

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It's okay, Freddy.

"It's okay, Freddy."

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Claire, don't list your apartment with Tyler.

"Claire, don't list your apartment with Tyler."

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Nobody is going to work harder for you

"Nobody is going to work harder for you"

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or understand more about what you are going through than I will.

"or understand more about what you are going through than I will."

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Oh really? You? You understand what I'm going through?

"Oh really? You? You understand what I'm going through?"

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Yes. I just got left, too,

"Yes. I just got left, too,"

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after 17 years.

"after 17 years."

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