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Clips from Dave Chappelle: The Closer

"[audience murmuring]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[murmuring continues]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience clapping in unison]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[sudden silence]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[vinyl pops]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ Listen carefully ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ This is for my favorite band Of human beings ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ The faithful, the graceful, The tragic, the classic ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ The evidence of things unseen, The book of light ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ The mansions of the moon The bones are for their own ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ Recently discovered And everything but no ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ The doubtest doubts about it Never made it unsure, life! ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ The gift, peace out the pressure Can't remember how you came ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ When I am better, How you exit from the start ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ The only thing certain is the end ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ Promise to all and none, Knowing not when ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ Heartbreak from yesterday, A fret for tomorrow ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ I leave you now filled with anxiety And hollow ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ If you break don't worry, If you worry don't break ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ My homie told it to me Just the other day ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ From the tall castle walls To the mean teeth streets ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"♪ I hope you get what you are And that you are what you need ♪"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Thank you."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience cheers]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Everybody have a seat, be comfortable, relax."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I got to tell you... let's go."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience cheers]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Thank you."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I need you guys to know something."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"And I'm gonna tell you the truth, and don't get freaked out."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"This is going to be my last special for a minute."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience screams]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"It is all good. Listen to me."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I did it in Detroit for that reason."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience cheers]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"That's right."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"You wanna know why?"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"'Cause I talked so much shit about Detroit in the first special"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I figured, I might as well, do the last special here."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Sorry about that, by the way."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience laughs]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"First of all, before I even start, I'm gonna say that "I'm rich and famous.""
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience laughs]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"And the only reason I say that"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"is 'cause the last 17 months were hell, and I cannot imagine"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"what everybody went through."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Well, I'm happy to see you"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"and I'm happy you're well and I hope everyone you love is okay."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience cheers]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I don't want you to worry about me, I'm..."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"vaccinated, I..."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience laughs]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"got the Johnson & Johnson vaccine."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience laughs]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I got to admit, that's probably the most"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"niggaish decision I've made in a long time."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[applause]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I walk in to the doc like, "Give me the third best option.""
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience laughs]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I'll have what the homeless people are having."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"So far, so good."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"And I know you probably heard on the news, I did get coronavirus."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"And it was something else."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Like, okay first of all, when the doctor told me I had coronavirus"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I got to tell you, I was surprised how it made me feel."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I felt dirty."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[laughter]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I felt gross."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"'Cause I've been walking around Texas"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"just touching door knobs and shit, hands all moist."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Tipping niggas with cash. "Here, take this to your family.""
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[laughter]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I must have killed thousands of people."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Just trying to get tonight's show together"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"so I hope you appreciate it"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"'cause a lot of niggas died for me to get this one off."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[applause]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[cheering]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I hadn't felt that dirty in a long time."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Last time I can remember, feeling dirty like that,"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"man, I must have been a little boy."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I was being molested by a preacher."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[laughter]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"But don't feel bad for me, I liked it."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[laughter]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I used to get a kick out of cumming in that fellows face."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience laughs]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Well, he asked me to do it."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"They make you quarantine."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I had to quarantine for ten days at least."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"They said "You're gonna have to stay in the room," I didn't go nowhere."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"And it started making me nuts, 'cause I would just sit in the room"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"and watch videos all day."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Now, do you know what I was watching?"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"And I hate to say this, but there was a lot of videos"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"sadly, of Black people..."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"beating up Asians for no reason."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"These attacks were unprovoked, I couldn't believe it."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"And I was sitting in the room"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"watching this shit, it would stress me out."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I was stressed already because the whole time"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"when you get coronavirus, at least the first five days"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"you wait, and see how sick you're gonna get."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"And it turns out, and this is true..."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I didn't get sick at all."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[laughter]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Not a cough, not a booger, not a fever, nothing."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"Look at me"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I am the Magic Johnson of coronavirus."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience cheers]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"I just sat in the crib and got stronger all week."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"But I was stressed, 'cause I kept watching these videos of my beloved Black people"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"beating up my beloved Asian people, and being so cruel."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"And the whole time I watched those videos, this is fucked up"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"but I couldn't help but feel like--"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"When I saw these brothers beating these Asians up."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"It's probably what's happening inside of my body."
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[laughter]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[audience cheers]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
"[applause]"
Dave Chappelle: The Closer
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