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Clips from South Park - Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy (S10E10)

"And so then, I put my finger up my butthole, right?"
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"And I walked up to Kelly Nelson and I said, "Do you smell lemon grrass?""
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"And she smelled my finger and puked! Oh, guys, you should have been there."
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"Eric, I have to take you to the principal's office."
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"What?! I didn't do it. Kelly Nelson is a lair!"
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"I've been instructed to bring you to the principals office."
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"Oh, suck my balls you ginger Jew rat hall monitor!"
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"Punkass stoolie, who the fuck do you think you are?!"
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"I just doing my job. - I just dadededeh."
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"You why you are a hallway monitor? Because you don't have any friends."
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"You should kill yourself. You should kill yourself!"
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"Eric Cartman, report to the principals office immediately."
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"Ah, goddamnit!"
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"Come on in, Eric."
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"I'm sorry, principal Victoria. I didn't mean to do it, how could I been so foolish."
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"Eric, the reason why we called you in here is"
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"because it's your turn to be the school hallway monitor."
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"The hall monitor, me? - You need to watch for bad behaviour."
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"And make that anyone in the hall during class has an hall pass, m'okay."
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"If anyone doesn't, you have the authority to bring them to me."
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"A... authority?"
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"Now Eric, being the school hallway monitor is a big responsibility, m'okay."
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"It is important you take the job seriously and that you don't abuse the power."
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"Me?"
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"There's fear and darkness all around you"
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"The criminals are on the run"
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"No use in not having your hall pass"
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"I'll take you to the principal 'cause I'm the Dawg"
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"I am the Dawg, the big bad Dawg"
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"The Hallway Monitor!"
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"Hey, kid, get outta there."
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"That's cool, im done making my video anyways."
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"Hallpass! Show me your hallpass!"
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"What?!"
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"You know what this is? This is the mace they use on bears, faggot!"
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"Now let me see your hallpass. - It's right here."
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"Allright, cool, Rob. Go with Christ."
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"What?!"
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"You can't just push me up against the-"
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"I am the dawg. The big bad."
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"Oh, my god."
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"What the fuck is this?"
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"And so this shape with four sides, is what class?"
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"Ike Browlofski. You littering my hallway brah?"
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"What are you doing?"
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"I found this in the hallway. Apparently your student Ike has an crush on you."
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"You got an crush on your teacher, brah? Keep it out of my hallway. Go with Christ."
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"Here you go. - I don't think that's really necessary."
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"Hey! I don't tell you how to run your class. Don't tell me how to run my hallway."
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"Ike has a crush on teacher. - Ike has a crush on teacher."
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"That's enough class."
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"Okay, we'll see you tomorrow everybody."
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"Ike, could you stay just a few minutes please?"
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"Ike, i'm very flattered by all of your love notes."
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"But I need to be clear."
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"See there's been alot of female teachers on the news lately."
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"Who have been having relationships with young male students and..."
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"people might get the wrong idea."
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"Even though, I do admire you."
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"You are so smart and gifted."
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"So mature for your age."
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"I don't like Mason."
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"You listen and you really care about what I have to say."
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"You make me feel things, I never... felt before."
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"Ike, this is crazy. I'm your teacher."
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"How can we been having these feelings for eachother?"
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"Your so mysterious."
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"And I can't... And I can't..."
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"And I can't fight this feelin' anymore"
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"I've forgotten what I started fightin' for"
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"And if I have to crawl upon the floor"
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"Come crashin' through your door"
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"Baby, I cant fight this feelin' anymore"
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"That was unbelievable."
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"I've never felt like such a woman before."
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"They'll say our love is wrong, but we can't let anybody know,they'll never understand."
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"We were ment to be, I know it. How else can sex be that incredible?"
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"Ike, made an nanoo."
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"Hey, there mr weener what ya know. Do you need to tinkle tinkle?"
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"Yes, I do think so."
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"Hands! Let me see those hands!"
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"Show me your hallpass, brah. - It's, it's... I just had it."
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"I knew it."
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"Look brah, I had to bring you in. But I don't have any hard feelings against you, allright?"
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"Huh? - You need a smoke, brah?"
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"Okay."
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"You gotta give yourself over to Christ, brah. - I do?"
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"Jesus is Lord."
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"You can one direction in life or you just walk around in hallways without hallpass."
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"Or you can see the light, brah."
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"Kyle, I need you to go get your brother over at his teachers house."
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"Huh?"
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"Tell his teacher i'm sorry, but I forgot he has an doctors appointment today."
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"What's he doing at his teachers house?"
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"He's been going there in the afternoons for private turdering"
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"Hello?"
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"Excuse me. I'm here to pickup Ike."
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"Uh, hallo. Is Ike here?"
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"Hallo?"
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"Oh God, i'm sorry. I didn't mean to, I was looking for my brother."
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"Ike?"
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"What the hell is going on?"
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"Oh, what's the use Ike... were caught."
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"Hold on, please. You don't understand."
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"Really? What's there not to understand?"
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"Your brother and I..."
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"are in love."
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"He's a little young, don't you think?"
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"Ike is very mature for his age and you know it."
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"He makes me feel like nobody else does."
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"He loves me and only me. And I know I'm a godness to him."
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"When we make love he can give it to me hard or soft and gentle-"
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"Allright! We're getting the hell out of here!"
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"Ike! You can't possible want this? We have to tell mom!"
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"Is it so hard to believe that true love exists?"
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"This is nuts."
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"Mom, dad, have you ever met Ike's kindergarten teacher?"
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"Miss Stevensen? Yes, she's very nice."
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"Yes, well she likes Ike a whole lot. - That's great."
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"Yeah, except maybe it's not perfectly great."
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