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Clips from MacGyver - Awl (S01E01)

"we're gonna lose our only chance"
MacGyver
"to stop them."
MacGyver
"Which leaves the unofficial route:"
MacGyver
"us."
MacGyver
"Yeah."
MacGyver
"Exile?"
MacGyver
"Are you kidding me, bro?"
MacGyver
"Even if I wasn't a wanted man,"
MacGyver
"I'd still be living in Lubuan, yo."
MacGyver
"I'm like God down here."
MacGyver
"Kanye."
MacGyver
"I'm telling you, you got to come"
MacGyver
"join me, brah."
MacGyver
"Hitting the hottest clubs, the finest honeys,"
MacGyver
"making more cheddar than any of you hedge fund chumps back home."
MacGyver
""Is it safe?" Listen to you."
MacGyver
"Of course it's safe. I just fired my bodyguards"
MacGyver
"and pocketed their salaries, yo."
MacGyver
"Trust me, Uncle Sam don't have a clue"
MacGyver
"where I am."
MacGyver
"I mean, unless being parked outside your house"
MacGyver
"watching you on thermal and visible"
MacGyver
"and tracking your GPS counts as having a clue."
MacGyver
"Guy's place looks like a Kardashian exploded."
MacGyver
"Straight cheese."
MacGyver
"Secret system?"
MacGyver
"Oh..."
MacGyver
"Oh, I want to punch this guy in the face so bad."
MacGyver
"Well, I want that for you, too, buddy,"
MacGyver
"but the trick's to do it without tipping off the local police,"
MacGyver
"which could tip off D-77."
MacGyver
"Take a look."
MacGyver
"Okay."
MacGyver
"Huh."
MacGyver
"Ralph may be too arrogant to pay for bodyguards,"
MacGyver
"but his security system is state-of-the-art."
MacGyver
"It's on a wireless network, but with this kind of encryption,"
MacGyver
"it could take days to break in."
MacGyver
"Which is time we don't have."
MacGyver
"Maybe we don't have to break in..."
MacGyver
"Okay, cards on the table,"
MacGyver
"I'm not great with computers."
MacGyver
"While most kids were learning how to use their first laptop,"
MacGyver
"I was taking mine apart to see how it worked."
MacGyver
"I never quite figured that out,"
MacGyver
"but I did learn enough to know this:"
MacGyver
"the biggest flaw in any computer system"
MacGyver
"is usually the person controlling it."
MacGyver
"So why hack a computer when you can hack a human being?"
MacGyver
"Using a handful of Wi-Fi chips and a soda can"
MacGyver
"as a directional antenna,"
MacGyver
"I can disrupt the Wi-Fi signal to Ralph's alarm keypad."
MacGyver
"Wireless signal interrupted."
MacGyver
"Which triggers the alarm,"
MacGyver
"which gets Ralph to type in his code,"
MacGyver
"which we can see."
MacGyver
"Lonely?"
MacGyver
"Bro, your mom is lonely."
MacGyver
"I'm just trying to get you in"
MacGyver
"on that sweet Malaysian transaction action."
MacGyver
"Nice."
MacGyver
"Now we just have to wait for him to go to sleep."
MacGyver
"I'm brushing my teeth with caviar and foie gras."
MacGyver
"Hey, do I seriously"
MacGyver
"have to listen to this asshat for the rest of the day?"
MacGyver
"Uh, actually, Ralphie times his sleep to the American markets."
MacGyver
"You have to listen to this asshat all night."
MacGyver
"Noise canceling. Beyoncé."
MacGyver
"Have fun."
MacGyver
"I'm gonna knock the curls off this kid, I'm telling you."
MacGyver
"Hello?"
MacGyver
"Aah! Son of a..."
MacGyver
"Aw, man."
MacGyver
"- Look, I had to do it, you know? - I'm just saying,"
MacGyver
"Riley does all the computer stuff,"
MacGyver
"you do your thing, and I do the punching, all right?"
MacGyver
"You don't see me going around making bombs out of paper clips"
MacGyver
"and chewing gum, do you? No."
MacGyver
"It frustrates me, man."
MacGyver
"I mean..."
MacGyver
"What?"
MacGyver
"How much is the government paying you guys, huh?"
MacGyver
"I'll triple it"
MacGyver
"and throw in a rare Wu-Tang album for free."
MacGyver
"Look, all we need from you is intel on the D-77 terrorists"
MacGyver
"and their next attack."
MacGyver
"Attack? I don't know anything."
MacGyver
"I'm just their money man."
MacGyver
"Yeah, I'm punching him anyway."
MacGyver
"It's coming, fool."
MacGyver
"It's coming."
MacGyver
"Now, let's get out of here."
MacGyver
"You are gonna tell us how to find D-77 right now."
MacGyver
"Bro, I told you,"
MacGyver
"I just handle their money, all right?"
MacGyver
"not where they are or what they're planning."
MacGyver
"But, hey, you guys like boats?"
MacGyver
"I can get you two brand-new, murdered out..."
MacGyver
"Sniper!"
MacGyver
"Please don't let me die."
MacGyver
"Riley, we're taking sniper fire."
MacGyver
"Can you get a visual on the shooter?"
MacGyver
"Got him. One dude,"
MacGyver
"Looks like D-77 was keeping an eye on their money man."
MacGyver
"It's gonna take months to sift through this stuff"
MacGyver
"without Ralph to explain it."
MacGyver
"We get him and his intel to the FBI"
MacGyver
"before these mercs take their money and run."
MacGyver
"Does a doctor factor into this plan at all?"
MacGyver
"Because in case you haven't noticed, I just got shot!"
MacGyver
"We're not gonna make it to you, Riley,"
MacGyver
"and Ralph isn't gonna make it home without medical attention."
MacGyver
"Find a doctor and meet us at the exfil."
MacGyver
"What are you guys gonna do, walk?"
MacGyver
"- Yeah. - Let's go. No, no!"
MacGyver
"Diddy's got one just like it."
MacGyver
"Is that really what you're worried about right now?!"
MacGyver
"Aw, dude!"
MacGyver
"I have the key!"
MacGyver
"and missed your heart, looks like you got lucky."
MacGyver
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