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Clips from Peep Show - The William Morris Years (S09E09)

"You punch him. Maybe you could sit on him, intimidate him, yeah?"
Peep Show
"Fart on his face. Psychological warfare. Yeah, grind him down."
Peep Show
"Attack his beliefs. Yeah. That, plus we fart."
Peep Show
"What is this, farty Guantanamo?"
Peep Show
"No, I..."
Peep Show
"I think we have to wake him up, just tell him to leave, like men."
Peep Show
"Or... He is sort of bagged for our convenience."
Peep Show
"Hm! What? We could just..."
Peep Show
"'I'm definitely going to agree to this."
Peep Show
"'I just need to put up an acceptable level of objection"
Peep Show
"'so I can be all reproachful if it proves to be a disaster,"
Peep Show
"Well..."
Peep Show
"OK, but on your heads be it. Bag him, Hans."
Peep Show
"Argh!"
Peep Show
"Hey, hey! Hey, hey, hey! I got him. He's bagged."
Peep Show
"You fucking... What's going on?! Sorry, pal."
Peep Show
"You are surplus to requirements. Put him out."
Peep Show
"I'm sorry, Jerry."
Peep Show
"CRASH Argh! Ow!"
Peep Show
"That's the normal way. The normal way?"
Peep Show
"None of this is normal! I've got a verbal contract!"
Peep Show
"He doesn't. You don't, Jerry. Yes, I do!"
Peep Show
"Put him in the lift, Hans. The lift?"
Peep Show
"Fucking hell. You got a wheelbarrow?"
Peep Show
"Why are you doing this, Mark?"
Peep Show
"AND watch Storage Hunters. Does that make me a bad person?"
Peep Show
"Don't put me in the lift! Stop wriggling."
Peep Show
"Should I give him a kick? Don't kick him!"
Peep Show
"Do not kick me! Jerry, stay still."
Peep Show
"This will all be over soon."
Peep Show
"I'm being kidnapped! All good here. It's just a prank."
Peep Show
"It's hijinks. We're the Croydon Bullingdon. It's not a prank!"
Peep Show
"I'm calling the police! Shut it or you're getting waterboarded."
Peep Show
"HE SPLUTTERS"
Peep Show
"This is horrible!"
Peep Show
"You two, seriously - you need to take a look at yourselves."
Peep Show
"He's right! Offensive behaviour! In he goes."
Peep Show
"This is against the Geneva Convention!"
Peep Show
"I'm contacting the Citizens Advice Bureau!"
Peep Show
"'I'm back, baby. The bitch is back.'"
Peep Show
"Bye, Jerry. See you at work tomorrow."
Peep Show
"Well, this is it. Super Hans' stag."
Peep Show
"Oi-oi, it's Snoopy and the Red Baron,"
Peep Show
"They've got a new waxwork of Zoella and some other wicked YouTubers."
Peep Show
"in their tiny flat?"
Peep Show
"but it suits me down to the ground."
Peep Show
"SUPER HANS WHIMPERS"
Peep Show
"'I might actually die."
Peep Show
"I work at a bank now, Johnson got me in."
Peep Show
"'you total fucking arsehole.'"
Peep Show
"So, what was it you wanted to say?"
Peep Show
"..sorrel soup."
Peep Show
"'I really don't think you could call my life a failure,"
Peep Show
"KNOCK ON DOOR"
Peep Show
"She'll break it off if she finds out I've been coke-ing."
Peep Show
"Jez... Uh, yeah, yeah, I'm a spiker, it's just one of my things."
Peep Show
"'But it is still a bank.' HE CHUCKLES"
Peep Show
"Hey, hey, hey, Marco. How you going, good buddy?"
Peep Show
"I thought you might be feeling like a guy"
Peep Show
"and I realised it was actually your sales record. Oh."
Peep Show
"'that starts the next financial meltdown.'"
Peep Show
"Brilliant. 'Ugh, more William Morris!"
Peep Show
"I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about."
Peep Show
"Mark, the embroidery is over."
Peep Show
"which is actually great, because then it never gets boring."
Peep Show
"'The Aldi Poirot with his CBBC magnifying glass.'"
Peep Show
"He said, like he was joking, that your coffee tastes like horse piss."
Peep Show
"Is this the Dobby thing?"
Peep Show
"And even... Apology accepted."
Peep Show
"Maybe I do sometimes wonder about Jerry,"
Peep Show
"Well, maybe I can help with that."
Peep Show
""Here's your tea, Jerry. God, you must get better soon.""
Peep Show
"THEY LAUGH"
Peep Show
"Jez, I thought you were going to grab the other end."
Peep Show
"Small claims court! I'm not part of this, Jerry."
Peep Show
"Yes. So basically, it is free, really."
Peep Show
"You're pumping out invites every time you play."
Peep Show
"# I'm not sick but I'm not well"
Peep Show
"fucking additions and let's detox till we've got mega cocks."
Peep Show
"'Finally! Let the apologathon commence.'"
Peep Show
"Oh, man, so you're in the shit. Yeah."
Peep Show
"Three grand? Free? It's not quite free..."
Peep Show
"could we have a chat about living arrangements?"
Peep Show
"'Crush! Crush the candy."
Peep Show
"HE CHUCKLES"
Peep Show
"which makes it better, but also means"
Peep Show
"'Crushing candy, quoting Shakespeare, hiding in a toilet in my own home."
Peep Show
"Yeah, listen, I'm afraid I have an announcement to make."
Peep Show
"'This stag is one load of PG-rated, Disney-assed,"
Peep Show
"then I look like a sausage dog fucker. Do you get me?"
Peep Show
"'Oh, my God, there he is.'"
Peep Show
"If it's just to wet the whistle..."
Peep Show
"LESS ENTHUSIASTIC: Boing."
Peep Show
"Yeah, after you've had three or four really big juices... Whatever."
Peep Show
"I guess I'm just a terrible, terrible shithead."
Peep Show
"'Yeah, right. He doesn't read the large print."
Peep Show
"Unless, erm... One little siparoo?"
Peep Show
"Jerry moved in a few weeks back. Yeah, I've just split from my ex."
Peep Show
"Yeah, so...howz youz? I'm most content."
Peep Show
"I know you like to pretend that you're this stuffed shirt"
Peep Show
"Do not bloody waterboard me! I warned you."
Peep Show
"'which it almost certainly will.' No!"
Peep Show
"'Hope he's not too horrible."
Peep Show
"'I'll never forget he tried to steal my girlfriend."
Peep Show
"'With the aid of a self-help CD I loathe, I've reached acceptance."
Peep Show
"Good to see you. Likewise, I'm sure. So..."
Peep Show
"(I would think it'll degenerate soon.)"
Peep Show
"'there's no way we can talk more about juice.'"
Peep Show
"Sleep it off. I fucking hate a futon."
Peep Show
"Drink from the tap, and when I need to,"
Peep Show
"I love it. Clever."
Peep Show
"MARK CLEARS HIS THROAT"
Peep Show
"I'm sorry, Jez, but you broke... You broke our trust."
Peep Show
"I thought it was a high-definition photo of some dog shit."
Peep Show
"I've watched Grand Designs with you."
Peep Show
"You tried to profess your love to my girlfriend"
Peep Show
"No. No, we couldn't."
Peep Show
"Shush, Jerry."
Peep Show
"but I've made my bed, so I've just got to..."
Peep Show
"'Oh, pissing pure Innocent smoothie,"
Peep Show