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Clips from American Dad! - Frannie 911 (S03E03)

"Steve, it's a beautiful afternoon."
American Dad!
"...or something heartbreaking?"
American Dad!
"I've given up that dorky pastime..."
American Dad!
"Work it, Dad. You're the star."
American Dad!
"Thrust it. Thrust it. Thrust it."
American Dad!
"Then hide the reveal."
American Dad!
"My sanctuary is ruined."
American Dad!
"- Roger painted me in my sleep. - My canvas is life. I'm an artist."
American Dad!
"The bitch was OD'ing on me, I gave her a shot in the heart."
American Dad!
"He knew Stockard Channing when she was in her late 40s."
American Dad!
"Oh, Roger. No, he doesn't."
American Dad!
"...if I live or die."
American Dad!
"See what I did? I bleeped myself. I took the joy away from the censors."
American Dad!
"- Hello. - We have Roger."
American Dad!
"If I were writing a play, which I am, but not about kidnapping, I'd set it here."
American Dad!
""Interior. Lanceton Ice Factory. Magic hour.""
American Dad!
"Hurry and tie me up. He'll be here any minute."
American Dad!
"- That'll be 8.50. - 8.50? In the newspaper it says 5.50."
American Dad!
"Where is he? Stan should have been here with the ransom hours ago."
American Dad!
"Lanceton makes Idledale look like West Hemmitberg."
American Dad!
"Look, just calm down. I'll go home and try to find out what happened."
American Dad!
"- Hungry. - Okay."
American Dad!
"Well, I have a Baggie of grapes in my purse."
American Dad!
"Stan, what are you doing here?"
American Dad!
"Who's getting married?"
American Dad!
"Ken."
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"Oh, God, he's looking at me. Say something."
American Dad!
"- Just a friend. - A work friend?"
American Dad!
"No, we didn't kill him. Yet."
American Dad!
"But we hear what you're saying. Times are tough."
American Dad!
"- For what? - You called it "our change jar.""
American Dad!
"Of course it's hard for him with you not working, not contributing."
American Dad!
"No. I hate it here. It's drafty."
American Dad!
"A motel? You think I'm a prostitute, but I'm not."
American Dad!
"...but sometimes the things we take for granted disappear..."
American Dad!
"- Yes. - Roger's going back to his planet?"
American Dad!
"...he'd fly over and send us a goodbye message."
American Dad!
"What's he saying to you?"
American Dad!
"I guess pretty much the same thing he's saying to you."
American Dad!
"Adjust your pot. Come on, what's he saying?"
American Dad!
"- I think... - Is he saying, "We have caller ID"?"
American Dad!
"I just wanted to show him you cared, but it turned into a nightmare."
American Dad!
"Hey, look."
American Dad!
"- So there is no Amanda? - There is, but she's fat."
American Dad!
"That's right. Because you're a spoiled brat."
American Dad!
"...you're gonna have to change. You have to be nice."
American Dad!
"I can't be nice all the time. It's not in my nature."
American Dad!
"- That's not what this is about. - Thank God."
American Dad!
"Should keep it in your study."
American Dad!
"Help! Raccoons took my penis."
American Dad!
"- Allow me, my dear. - Oh, thank you, Roger."
American Dad!
"Well, Roger, tell Steve what you think."
American Dad!
"He made me laugh for 10 minutes straight."
American Dad!
"When I'd had enough, he stopped."
American Dad!
"A little tough love turned out to be just what he needed."
American Dad!
"I am livid, Francine. Now I know how bears feel."
American Dad!
"Surprise. Your study's reborn."
American Dad!
"You'll remember that."
American Dad!
"Oh, Klaus dared me to dress like Captain Stubing for 14 months."
American Dad!
"That is really stupid."
American Dad!
"- Oh, God. Is this all my fault? - Yes."
American Dad!
"Send me Steve."
American Dad!
"I've seen two epileptics share a bowl of noodles with more grace."
American Dad!
"Yeah, kind of like how Stan is a giant douche bag."
American Dad!
"- Hey, take that back. - Don't have to. That's not who I am."
American Dad!
"Oh, I am."
American Dad!
"And I'll be your enabler as soon as Stan finishes being who he is:"
American Dad!
"This door is stuck. Can you get it for me?"
American Dad!
"God, what was I thinking? I don't wanna be an organ donor."
American Dad!
"People out there just rooting for me to die."
American Dad!
"Shouldn't you be outside with your friends..."
American Dad!
"...turning my tool shed into Mordor or Endor..."
American Dad!
"...and decided to follow my true passion:"
American Dad!
"We really should have spaced out your vaccinations."
American Dad!
"What the...?"
American Dad!
"- My study. - And my Turkish bath. Have a fig."
American Dad!
"You are so dead."
American Dad!
"Hold on."
American Dad!
"- You destroyed my study. - You barged into my sauna."
American Dad!
"What are you talking about? I offered you a fig."
American Dad!
"I offered him a fig, Francine."
American Dad!
"Is that true, Stan? Did he offer you a fig?"
American Dad!
"Because that sounds like the opposite of selfish."
American Dad!
"That sounds nutritious."
American Dad!
"- All you ever do is defend him. - Oh, I do not."
American Dad!
"Please, you're always doing it."
American Dad!
"Leave him alone, honey. He's an artist."
American Dad!
"- Roger stuck a syringe in my chest. - I was playing Pulp Fiction."
American Dad!
"- He took my hair. - He took my land."
American Dad!
"You have to stop making excuses for him. You're an enabler."
American Dad!
"He doesn't understand how things work here."
American Dad!
"He's been on this planet for 60 years."
American Dad!
"No, I knew Stockard Channing in the late '40s. She was 50."
American Dad!
"God, I'm sick of you."
American Dad!
"Francine, if you wanna deal with Roger, be my guest, but I am through."
American Dad!
"- You're dead to me. - Well, you're dead to me too."
American Dad!
"You hear me? I don't care what you think."
American Dad!
"Please don't cry."
American Dad!
"He doesn't care..."
American Dad!
"I'm gonna kill myself."
American Dad!
"I'm gonna go to Europe and throw myself in the Baltic Sea."
American Dad!
"Roger, please, don't talk like that. Of course Stan cares."
American Dad!
"- I'll prove it to you. - Really? How?"
American Dad!
"Don't worry. I'll come up with a plan."
American Dad!
"Yes, a plan."
American Dad!
"I was gonna say, "Let's just let stuff happen"..."
American Dad!
"...but, yes, a plan."
American Dad!
"- Will you carry me? - Aren't you a little big for...?"
American Dad!
"- I'm sad. - Okay. Okay."
American Dad!
"You're a big boy."
American Dad!
"I like being carried."
American Dad!
"Hey, Klaus, check it out. My dad is gonna hit the roof."
American Dad!
"Oh, a temporary henna tattoo. How daring."
American Dad!
"Like you're so daring. You won't even go into the deep end of your own bowl."
American Dad!
"How about Dare or Dare?"
American Dad!
"How about I punch you in the bleeping face?"
American Dad!
"Okay, I'll go first. I dare you to kiss me."
American Dad!
"Now I'll never know how that ghost left footprints."
American Dad!
"- What? Who is this? - The kidnappers."
American Dad!
"- Cinnabon. - You savages."
American Dad!
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