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Clips from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015) - Kimmy Goes to Church! (S03E03)

"One of my aunts, Ernestine, melted, Kimmy."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Titus, don't ruin this for me."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Ain't no way Morgan Fairchild is shopping there."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"That woman's a user, a gossip, and a snake in the grass."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I wish this neighborhood had enough grass to support snakes."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Maybe they'd eat the spiders that are eating all the birds."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Next step: table manners."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"That is a table."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Forget it, Blondie. I am outta here."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Everything hurts in this monkey suit."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I hope so; those shoes are genuine white-faced capuchin."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Let me ask you a question. Who is all this for?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Is it to impress that Deirdre lady?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"'Cause that woman is like Domino's pizza..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"hot but terrible."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"At school pickups, Easter egg hunts,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So excuse me if I care what I look like."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Well, I don't give a rip for outer beauty"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"It's disgusting in there."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Thanks, but no, thanks."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Thank you. Thank you."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Guess some people don't know gluttony is one of the Seven Deadly Sins."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I heard he had the Al Roker procedure,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"but it just fwoomped right back."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh. Who are we to judge, right?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Mostly catalogs."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"He doesn't have any friends and can't afford anything in there."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm just worried."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And I'm still getting used to her."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Thinks she can come down here from Boston"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"and tell me my grandson can't use the Mimeo machine?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"He got a mixtape to get out there."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"but I don't care for a female pastor."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Um, women can do anything."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Saint Paul said women should be silent in church."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh... Reuben!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"about that new person."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I have an arrangement to finish. Can this wait?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I just think you need to know some things"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"about your new high-ass tenor, Titus."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But okay, I'll find you after service tomorrow."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Which is better than somewhere else."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But spare the rod and spoil the child."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm gon' be like Naomi and go to bingo."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Glory to God!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Titus, you were right about Miss Clara."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"She is not a good person."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Well, I hate to say I told you so,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"because I prefer the less formal "toldja.""
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Toldja!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"She used the Bible to manipulate me."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Basically. That and cut-up doughnuts."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Uh-huh. Well, Clara's gonna talk to Reuben tomorrow."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"About you."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Well, unlike Jesus, I'm not just gonna give up."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"-We've gotta stop her! -But how?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"We've gotta tell on her before she tells on you."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I saw Clara steal a coat from the clothing drive."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Except no one's gonna believe us over her."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"We need to catch her red-handed."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Then we can expose her to the whole church."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But first, off to the hat store."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Lillian! We need to talk."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh, for Pete's sake. This again?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I couldn't stop thinking about you meeting the Goodmans"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"looking like a sack full of other sacks."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You are like me. You're exactly like me!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"What are you talking about?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Not long after I moved to New York,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I was asked out by a hideous but very wealthy man"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"who first mistook me for a prostitute."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"He invited me to the ballet, but I didn't realize that."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Because back home, Swan Lake was just a lake."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I was humiliated."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And that young, impressionable girl in the fishing gear..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"was me."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Yeah, I know. That was the whole story."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I just don't want that to happen to you."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Especially if you care about Artie."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"After that night, I never saw 15-year-old Eric Trump again."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Come downstairs."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"No."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Did you know he made a bunch of shoes once during a cocaine bender?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- Mm. - Yeah."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Whoa, comfy, huh?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"My mind is so clear!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"It works on two levels, Lillian."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Does that dress have no waist?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Yeah!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You look like a black guy on Easter."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"to prove I'm a good person."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But we almost forgot our bait."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"To the clothing drive!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"The clothes just took me here, Lillian."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Like where you got that nice coat."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I like it how the rest of the mall is closed."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"That's your coat?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Listen, honey, I believe you know my nephew, Reuben?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"The choir director's your nephew?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"He's... a nerd?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Saint Paul says, "Love does no harm to a neighbor.""
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Hold up."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Miss Clara, are you trying to set me up with Reuben?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I don't know..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Miss Clara, this is the greatest miracle to ever happen on Easter."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Well, I always say,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"if you give love to the world, you'll get twice the love back."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Which is why I brought you this."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Bunny, Kitty, get into my office."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"White lady!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Wait. What time is it?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Well, my 18-hour bra busted out about four hours ago,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"so I wanna say... 2:30."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"It's after two? I'll be late to pick up Buckley."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"My bags! I left them here by the door."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And I'm dumb enough to take Jacqueline's bags for no reason!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You're right, Lillian."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Okay, I'll just call an Uber."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh, no."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I have to go to the Benedict Arnold Club dressed like this?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
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