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Clips from Superstore - Spokesman Scandal (S02E02)

"when I got back last night."
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"I'd prefer to have them."
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"- Just louder. - I'm hungry."
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"What is wrong with her?"
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"I'm hungry."
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"Amy."
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"What are you wearing that for?"
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"Be... Jonah..."
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"Ah, buh, buh, buh, buh."
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"I'm dressed in this costume to show my support"
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"for the cannibal lifestyle."
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"Oh."
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"Oh, well, as it turns out,"
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"Kyle was not a cannibal."
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"He was only killing and eating people"
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"because he was high on marijuana."
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"What?"
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"It's just that I don't think that marijuana turns people into murderers."
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"Otherwise we'd literally be surrounded by killers."
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"I mean..."
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"Uh, probably."
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"Well, how... how many of them?"
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"Like..."
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"Half."
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"Half?"
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"Wait, half do, or half don't?"
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"It's both."
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"Okay, so, tummy time is literally just a baby"
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"spending time on its tummy."
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"Hmm."
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"Wait, she's gonna turn her head..."
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"Nope, now."
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"Nope, now."
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"Nope."
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"Oh, sorry, guys, bad timing."
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"Hi, Bo, I was just showing them the tummy time video."
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"No, not that one, the good one."
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"This has got to stop."
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"Thank you."
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"She is breaking an unspoken social contract."
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"You show one photo."
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"One."
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"even if it's creepy, which it is,"
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"because it's a shrunken-down human,"
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"and then we all move on with our lives."
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"I mean, I have a ton of photos of my dogs,"
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"but no one wants to see those."
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"All right, you know I got to see that."
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"Okay, come on now."
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"Oh, no."
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"Yeah."
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"Little Ewok dog."
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"You stealing a speeder?"
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"Hey. Just ignore me."
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"Just wanted to tell you I value you."
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"Thank you."
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"I appreciate that."
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"I'm going to go over there, okay?"
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"If you're smelling the workers, you gotta smell Elias."
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"On Thursdays he smells like ham."
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"It's hilarious."
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"Dina, do you think that marijuana could've had anything"
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"to do with what Kyle did?"
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"That's just about the stupidest thing"
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"you've ever said."
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"Fine."
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"I'm just wondering if I have to start"
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"drug testing the employees."
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"But you always say that you don't want to do that."
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"I know, but if the alternative is someone in this store getting eaten."
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"Oh, wow. Ooh."
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"Well, to be safe, I mean, I could do a surprise"
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"comprehensive drug test, but that's your call."
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"I mean, I could go either way."
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"Do it, don't do it."
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"Yes. Okay."
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"Go for it."
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"It's up to you."
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"I'm coming for you, Tommy Chong."
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"I'm coming for you."
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"Three minutes."
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"You can just give up."
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"Nope!"
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"I take not being a chicken very seriously."
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"I'm winning."
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"The test will detect any drugs in your system."
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"We're talking marijuana, cocaine, heroin, methamphetamines."
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"What about power pellets?"
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"Ah..."
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"I don't see that. What are they?"
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"Oh, you just take some big boppers,"
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"you cut in some fetty wap, you put a little disco shake"
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"Smoke it."
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"Get real high."
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"All right, we're gonna be testing for everything, okay?"
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"Excuse me, I just remembered I have to leave early."
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"- I have a thing at the place. - What place?"
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"You talked to me about it?"
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"Yeah, I filled out an application and Brett saw it, he said it's cool, so..."
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"Okay, nobody is leaving until I get three ounces of yellow, all right?"
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"Okay, look, everyone, Dina has my full support on this."
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"Okay, this is for your protection."
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"Look, people, if you haven't done any drugs"
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"in the last 72 hours, you have nothing to worry about."
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"What about way too much wine?"
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"Justine, you're not an alcoholic."
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"Stop bragging."
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"Attention Cloud 9 shoppers:"
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"We hope you're having a lovely day."
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"If you have any questions or concerns,"
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"please find our lead salesman, Charles."
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"Is there anything we should know about him?"
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"He is in charge."
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"♪ Charles in charge ♪"
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"♪ Of our days ♪"
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"♪ And our nights ♪"
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"♪ Charles in charge ♪"
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"♪ Of our wrongs ♪"
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"♪ And our rights ♪"
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"♪ And I sing ♪"
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