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Clips from Shameless - Nana Gallagher Had an Affair (S01E01)

"and then her mom walked in and freaked out"
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"when she saw Mindy in the shower with a big,"
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"black strap-on dildo."
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"Whores don't get cars!"
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"Okay."
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"There, I hope everybody's hungry."
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"There you go, Ian, it's your favorite."
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"What is it?"
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"Lasagna."
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"Carl, could you start passing the salad, please?"
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"Monica is Liam's mother, and I know you won't"
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"be happy, but... Jesus,"
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"Talk about what?"
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"please."
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"Where's Lip?"
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"He's not coming?"
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"Did I miss the chow?"
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"Ooh... looks good."
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"we don't want to hear it. Fiona,"
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"I was married to Frank for 18 years."
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"Your mother said 6:30."
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"You lose your watch?"
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"Haven't opened it yet. Figured we should do it together."
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"Me and Ian decided"
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"to get our DNA tests done, too,"
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"What?"
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"get to have all the fun?"
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"Holy shit."
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"Congratulations, Ian."
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"Karen?"
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"Sweetie..."
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"Honey?"
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"Honey?"
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"Karen?"
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"He promised me the fucking car!"
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"You remind me of my first communion!"
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"Honestly, sweetie,"
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"I don't know."
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"There was that week in the summer of '95"
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"that I did a lot of PCP."
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"Without me?!"
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"You promised we would do that together!"
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"Excuse me. Can we get back to who Ian's father is?"
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"I like the idea of Monica cheating on Frank, you know?"
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"It really keeps my image of you right on track, Mom."
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"Will somebody please"
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"tell me what we're talking about?"
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"All right, the results say"
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"But my father is a close relative,"
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"most likely one of your brothers."
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"Dad has brothers?"
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"Three."
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"that sells smoked sausage and razor blades"
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"I-I honestly don't know."
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"Not only did you lie to me about the PC,"
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"you fucked my brother! What's next?"
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"You gonna take up with a black lady/man?"
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"How can we get back together now?"
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"I have never, ever had any intention of getting back"
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"together with you, Frank."
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"For Chrissake, you only tricked me into coming here"
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"to get some settlement money!"
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"I wanted to see you again."
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"So you pretended that she won a teddy bear?"
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"You know how much I love teddy bears."
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"You and Monica are over, Frank."
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"Me and Monica are getting married."
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"Aah! She's still married to me."
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"You two are still married?"
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"How can two ladies get married?"
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"They're lesbians."
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"Penetration isn't required for sex to occur."
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"What? It's legal now in several states."
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"Divorce, Frank."
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"You owe her at least that much."
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"What about what she owes me?!"
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"She gonna leave me again with six kids?"
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"Leave me to deal with all the shit?"
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"I didn't leave you!"
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"You drove me out!"
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"No self-respecting person could stay with you, Frank!"
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"Hey, hey!"
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"You need to let us raise Liam."
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"I don't care what the test results say."
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"Me and Bob deserve a family of our own."
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"You should have protected us!"
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"I tried, but I couldn't!"
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"Oh, cut the shit, Myrna Loy."
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"You have no idea what it was like being married to him."
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"You have no idea how bad it is!"
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"Yeah? Try me."
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"Oh, come on now!"
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"Okay, I know that he tortured you."
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"I know that he ruined you, but we didn't marry him, Mom."
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"You did."
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"If you love us, any of us in any way,"
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"you'll leave Liam, take your girlfriend,"
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"get in your truck and never come back."
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"But..."
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"I..."
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"What's the matter with you?"
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"She tell you?"
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"She tell you what she said?"
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"How about what she did to me?!"
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"Get out. Out."
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"What...? Just get out!"
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"Get out! Did she mention what she did to me?!"
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"You understand? Get out!"
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"She's a human being!"
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"She deserves love, not hate!"
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"You weren't there. I know all those people?"
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"What's the matter with you?! Don't ever come back!"
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"Just keep going on and on! Don't ever come back! Go!"
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"Forever!"
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"Frank! Frank, did you see what Eddie did to my Karen?"
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"What?"
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"You're out of the house."
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"I got so mad, I-I-I came out of the house."
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"What are they doing?"
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"Looks like packing."
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