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Clips from Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021) - New Tricks (S01E01)

"Yeah."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Yellow Gatorade and tequila."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"-With a maraschino cherry. -Ugh."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Of all the drinks I miss, that one's pretty high up there."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Mm."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"So, you wanted to talk?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"About?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Uh..."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Something that isn't the weather,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"or my aunt's foot ailments, or the feud with the neighbors."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"decade, really."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Like, I can't believe how much time"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I've spent talking about nothing."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"And now that I feel like I actually have something to say,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"um, the closest thing that I have"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"to someone who cares is a dog."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I care."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Just that you knew me before --"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"W-When we were younger."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I had friends, right?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Yeah."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Yeah, I feel like they all had names"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"that started with J, K, and L."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Katie, Kelly, Lauren, Lindsay --"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"They liked church."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"They loved church. Mm."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"And your friends in the swim team."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Well, no."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Those girls didn't really like me."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I was a bit --"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
""Was"?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Okay."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"and I had you."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I just don't know when I got so isolated from everyone."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Wish you'd been here for the last 10 years."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I mean, I'm not sure that would've actually helped."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Why?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"People who think they're cut off from everyone"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Okay, can we not? 'Cause I've already"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"turned down therapy once this week, so --"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"No, yeah. Sure."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I'm just saying,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"you're the one who pulled away."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Okay, I mean, you were gone"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"way before I got married, okay?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Uh-- How are we talking about this?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I just wanted someone to talk with."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Did you, though?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"'Cause from where I'm sitting, you wanted someone"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"to listen and nod and agree with you."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I take it back."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I'm good. How are you?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Wha-- Have we been robbed?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"That is absolutely correct."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Shouldn't we be calling the police?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Oh, simple Allison."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"This is all a part of my master plan."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Okay, well, the last time you said that,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"we had to cut down the oak tree to get you out of it."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"That tree was an eyesore for 300 years."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Paul Revere planted it."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"The security system picked up some of those damn neighbors"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"lurking outside the house last night."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Really?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Wh-- How do you know it was them?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Uh, he was wearing the hoodie."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"That's tough, babe."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"But as I was trying to lure an entire family of skunks"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"under the neighbor's house,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I need to go to the insurance company."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"So, ta-dah!"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"when that playing card punctured your eardrum."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"This is the magic of insurance."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Guy's coming down later today to take claims on everything."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"TV, Wade Boggs rookie card, your father's ashes."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"-Kevin. -I'm just kidding."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"He's not worth anything."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"No way."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Our stuff is actually missing."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I mean, maybe if you went over to Neil's garage..."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Ugh....it might all be in there, but who knows?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Y-- No, no, no! And not you!"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I am not going in Neil's garage."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"-I am taking Bill out. -Whoa, whoa."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Who's Bill, and where are you taking him?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Oh, uh, that whole security system wasn't working."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"The cameras were blurry, the dog was a bum,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"and the bat broke when Neil and I were smashing watermelons."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I scrapped all of it."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"All of it?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"-Even the dog? -I took him back to my guy."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"once he finds "Bill" tied to his porch."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"You abandoned the dog?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"If that's abandonment, abandon me every morning."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"With that insurance money, I can get the hoodie"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"that Belichick wore in the 2017 playoffs."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"So, that other hoodie --Keep it, foreigners!"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Put another win on the board!"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"In the game of life, it's Kevin 632,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Life 3."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"New Belichick Hoodie Day, baby!"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Oh, um, excuse me."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Is there a therapist office in here?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Therapist?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"She'll hook you up."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"She'll "hook me"..."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Oh, it's drugs."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"One sec."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Seeing you again makes me feel a little guilty."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Oh, yeah?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Jenn, this is Alison. Alison, my wife, Jenn."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"We've actually met before."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"What the hell's been going on with you?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Aw, man, I really need this hoodie."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Hope you also told 'em who's the beta."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Um..."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Um, I was hoping to do some computer research."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Very pathetic."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"and buy a bus ticket to Jersey?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Sure."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
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