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Clips from Hogan's Heroes - Kommandant of the Year (S01E01)

"A Colonel Schneider and his staff"
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"A scroll. That's pretty fancy."
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"Probably even have cupids on it."
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"Very common name."
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"Yes, I know, but..."
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"I once knew a George Schneider in Chicago."
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"He was a butcher."
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"Had a thumb that weighed a pound and half."
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"Wilhelm Klink, Kommandant of the Year."
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"Has a good, nasty ring to it, sir."
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"I worked hard to get this."
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"I deserve it."
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"Stalag 13 should be in the top ten."
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"A formation of the command..."
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"Sir, request permission for the prisoners to parade?"
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"After all, you belong to us, too."
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"Just a simple ceremony, presentation of the awards,"
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"that made us famous here at Stalag 13."
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"After your acceptance speech, of course."
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"Acceptance speech?"
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"Oh, nothing elaborate."
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"Just a half an hour, 40 minutes."
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"Just the essentials."
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"But I'd leave out the ugly incident"
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"with the Munich police, if I were you."
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"Split the difference."
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"Do you really feel it's necessary?"
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"Don't you, General Klink?"
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"I know what you mean."
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"Colonel Hogan, this is against regulations,"
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"Thanks."
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"And what does it say in your little Geneva book about that?"
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"Well, let's see."
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"Schnapps?"
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"Here it is, page five, Chapter four, Section one."
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"Only the good stuff."
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"( chuckles )"
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"All right, you got everything?"
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"Map, walkie-talkie. Oui, Colonel."
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"Hello, I am the Big, Bad Wolf."
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"And they must answer, We are Little Red Riding Hood."
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"It's terrible. No imagination."
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"If you wanted to be a writer,"
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"go into Special Services."
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"and good luck."
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"Big Bad Wolf calling Red Riding Hood."
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"Need your position. Come in."
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"Come in, Red."
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"Hey, Red Riding Hood, stop fooling around."
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"I'm waiting at M-14. Where are you?"
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"Goldilocks to Big Bad Wolf, what's the problem, Wolf?"
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"Can't find Little Red Riding Hood,"
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"Carter, tell Schultz one of our men is missing."
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"Right, Colonel."
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"Hey, Schultz!"
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"Schultz!"
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"Schultz, come here."
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"Schultz, the Colonel just took count."
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"He went over the wire."
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"Not so loud. You are waking everybody up."
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"I thought you might want the credit."
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"Oh, yeah. Danke."
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"Achtung! Achtung!"
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"Prisoner went over the wire!"
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"Report made by Sergeant Schultz,"
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"serial number zwei, sieben, ach..."
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"( bell ringing )"
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"( barking )"
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"What took you so long?"
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"Ecoutez-moi."
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"Commandos-- four parachutes."
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"( whistles )"
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"Comprenez?"
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"Okay, find them."
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"Find them! Commandos!"
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"Ah, come on, you call yourselves guard dogs"
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"I'm ashamed of you."
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"( dogs whining )"
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"( barks )"
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"Little Red Riding Hood calling Big Bad Wolf."
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"Come in, Big Bad Wolf."
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"Come in."
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"Any luck?"
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"Perhaps you can do something with it, Dr. Schneider?"
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"No, no, no. We didn't use walkie-talkies at Cal Tech."
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"Little Red Riding Hood."
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"I suppose that's rather hard to believe, too."
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"I'm Corporal Lebeau, Stalag 13."
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"LEBEAU: What happened?"
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"The wind blew our chutes away from M-14"
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"and the radio got smashed."
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"Oh, may I see you a little closer, please?"
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"Stand natural, please."
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"No, hands at your side."
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"Thank you."
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"15½."
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"15½."
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"What's that for?"
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"German uniforms."
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"You're going into Stalag 13 tomorrow in a staff car."
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"32½."
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"32½."
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"You like a belt or suspenders?"
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"Figured."
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"41½."
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"41½."
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"Nicht schiessen!"
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"You want them to think you're pussy cats?"
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"Colonel Schneider?"
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"I'm Colonel Klink."
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"It is a great honor and privilege"
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"to welcome you to Stalag 13."
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"Danke Schoen, Klink."
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"My officers: Captain Hockenburg,"
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"Lieutenant Brauer, Lieutenant Smith... berg."
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"Jawohl. Excellent."
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"So far, so good."
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"Oui, but I wish we had more time."
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"Why?"
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"Schneider's uniform needs a little work around the collar."
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